I'm kinda new here. Been reviewing this forums more than posting. Let me introduce myself a little.
I'm 22, finished a long term relationship a few months ago - I was really broken, always hoped to get it back and never stopped thinking of her. I knew the best thing to do is move on and meet other girls. Years back I've heard about pickup, read a book or two, but never got to work on my game as I was in two long term relationships ever since the ago of 17.
Just recently I started to work as a bartender, the best opportunity to interact with beautiful girls. And this is where my journey begins:
#1 make-out: Super hot blonde waitress. (time: a few weeks ago):
It's my first shift at work, kinda busy at learning the job. The bar is almost empty, so once she gets in and sits outside I cannot not notice her. We hold a strong eye-contact (that was enough for me to go for number). She is a new waitress waiting to start her shift. As soon as my shift is done, I got to her and directly ask for her phone number - she is surprised by my confidence to be so direct. At the same night we started chatting, and the day after and the day after. Long interesting, flirty, and rapport building texts.
We set the date for a few days later - went for kiss, denied.
Kept talking and texting till second meet a few days later. Finished with make-out.
The day after she went cold, showed less investment, and I couldn't arrange a meet - So I finally asked what's up and she told me she has just finished a relationship and she feels like it's too fast for her. - Alright, it's all good.
A good point to maintain: She is really super hot, just my type. I was really surprised by myself to have something started with such a girl. She was super into me and made it really easy to maintain my good frame.
Despite all that she gone cold after we kissed, and I was not pursuing - keeping the abundance mentality feels really good, no hard emotions and needy behaviors. Of course she is still in my mind and we sometimes throw a bone one to each other, but for some reason we still haven't meet each other privately again.
#2 make out: A cool girl sitting with her friends on my bar (last weekend):
I was working, weekend, the place is full of people and good music! She is there with two more friends, drinking and flirting with me. All the way throwing me looks. I handed her a pen and a sheet, she writes her number. The day after - some texts, meeting at night having a drink, talking and building some rapport. I was focusing on maintaining kino (I noticed the I didn't do it enough it in the first date with the previous blond and set it as a goal to improve). I went for the kiss, closed. Kept talking, moving to somewhere else, isolated and some makeout. Drove her home, some more makeout in my car, no way to isolate farther to her home or my place.
We keep in touch, texting from time to time. I'm not in a rush on her and would be happier to meet more exciting girls rather than pushing it forword.
A good point to maintain: This girl isn't my defined "type" by the look. She isn't a blue eyes blond as I love - but yet
the thought that led me: "would I enjoy that girl? of course!".
#3 Instadate Fuck close: blue eyes chick sitting on my bar with a friend of her. (two days ago).Again, people, music, I'm working and the vibe is on. 2 places gets free and those two girls coming to sit on my bar. I looked her in the eyes and told her "I was waiting for you!" We have some strong eye contact and some discussions during my shift. When I'm done (the bar is still on with other bartenders) I sit besides her and starting to discuss and kino. At this point I notice she escalates me more than I go for her! she scratches my palm and gets really close to me face to face. I went for a kissed on the bar and denied, twice - playing hard to get huh? She told me she is going to a nearby club with her friend, I accepted to join and until we got it we touched each other like a couple (back hugging and such) and yet she denies my attempts for a kiss. When we're I wanted to ask what's wrong - I started thinking she has a boyfriend - but before I get to open my mouth she kisses me. Lot's of make out in the corner of the bar.
She starts talking about that she has never been like that with a stranger and such, I neutralize it by commenting that I believe people should do what's fun and not consider the shitty stereotypes and such (blah blah). Took her into the toilet and FC - no LMR.
A good point to maintain: I wasn't expecting it to get that far! From now on I should
push more forward and not get satisfied by number or kiss.
#4 make out - another girl I number closed from the bar a few days back (yesterday):
So I'll skip the number close, nothing different from the last one.
Met her yesterday's night. I meet a very hyper active and talking girls haha, she can't stop talking! We were sitting on the beach and talking for hours, some kino some step backs, she was so confident by herself it confused me - I thought alot about going for a kissed and didn't do. She offered a massage (why not haha), and after that she wanted some back - smooth for the kiss. Changed for a more private place and made out. Put her home, some more makeout in my car and bye bye.
A good point to maintain: Well, she was so confident that I started having stupid thought about her not even wanting something from me and it took me a lot to go for the kiss. She did the big step (massage routined me
). But
once I went for it, she was all over me. So for next time, just assume attraction and escalate.
The last three happened within the same week - from last Saturday to this.
I got tired of writing and made it not so detailed, but the important key notes for me are:
-As Eddie always says, and trust me there is nothing easier than this, you should do nothing but assuming. Assume attraction from the first contact you create, or even easier, if she creates that first contact.
-Don't strict yourself just for the type you love - I used to only open girls I'm highly attracted to them. But I found it really enjoyable even if she isn't the desired 10... As long as she is hot, you'd enjoy it.
-When I'm sitting with the girl I don't think of gaming - it just ruins it. Just let her talk, raise topic that you like, and focus on kino. It doesn't have to be indirect and accidental, you don't need to hide your intentions. But still keep it natural and when you feel like it's uncomfortable take a step back.
-Of course, the abundance - once you'll get into that loop, nothing should stop it. I have the possibility to meet new girls, or I can meet one of those and escalate farther. This creates a strong and a confidence frame that does most of the game for me without me thinking so much.
That was a damn long writing...
I hope it would cheer some guys up and I'd love to read your comments.
CHAT