Scenario 1: Girl standing outside a shop

Me: Hi, how's it going?
Girl: I'm fine thanks (guarded look)
Me: What are you doing standing out here?
Girl: I am just waiting for a friend. What do you want? (very suspicious and quite scared)
Me: Ah nothing. See ya later (tail between legs)

Ok, I did not expect her to quite react like this. It was broad daylight and there were lots of people around. Perhaps she misinterpreted my smile? I don't know. I hope I wasn't coming across as sleazy or something. She became super defensive and I didn't know what to do to make her lower her guard.

Scenario 2: Girl just leaving a cafe

Me: Hey hold up
Girl: Hi
Me: How you doing?
Girl: Fine thanks (smiles)
Me: (Noticed she was wearing a uniform) What's that uniform for?
Girl: I'm a nurse
Me: Wow, impressive. I have a lot of respect for nurses. You guys do all the hard work but the doctors get all the credit
Girl (laughs) Thanks

(Things appear to be going quite well!)

Me: So what do you specialise in?
Girl: I am a midwife.
Me: That's awesome. How many babies have you delivered!
Girl: I don't know! Must be getting up to a thousand

(Girl appears to be in a rush ... I'm guessing going to work or something. I didn't want to delay her)

Me: Hey, I'd like to catch up sometime. How about I grab your phone number?
Girl: Sorry, I don't give my phone number out to strangers.
Me: Oh come on now! Do I look that scary
Girl: (laughs) I'm sorry I just don't do that.
Me: (not sure what to do) Alright then. You have a nice day.

(we part company)

Well, there you go. A couple of opportunities blown.

What would you have done? I think bailing on the first girl was the right thing to do. You must have IOI to get something going. There appeared to be a bit of a connection with the nurse though.

I'm thinking perhaps with the nurse I should have said, "Alright, I respect that but I would like to get to know you better. What would it take for us to meet up where you would feel safe?". Is this good? I don't think it's that good because she probably would have said, "give me your number" and we don't want to do that now, do we? That's giving too much power to the girl. We want to be in control of this, right?

Any thoughts?

In both situations, you provided no plausible deniability or situational relevance for talking to her with an indirect opener; nor did you open directly and state your intent. It would have also helped to preserve the target's comfort levels if you provided a false time constraint or negged her. In scenario 2, the target tolerated you long enough for you to go into compliance/rapport seeking questions. You asked interview questions and intended to respond positively no matter what she said. Afterwards, you attempted a number close without building any attraction.
I think you're better off for not saying that. The interaction was already blown. Furthermore, it's try-hard (dlv).


Have you read any of the common seduction books?

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Ok, one thing at at time.

So you're saying that if I see a girl I like in a random place e.g. outside a shop, I should just go up to her and say "hi, I like you?". That's plain stupid man. If that wouldn't creep anyone out nothing would.

How would you have negged target 1? I barely got 2 sentences in before I was given the cold shoulder. Go on then, please enlighten us.

I've read some of David de Angelo's stuff (DYD). Obviously I need to read more ...

in the first situation you shouldnt have opend with "how are you doing", and not have said "what are you doing here"
both state you are interested in the girl

when we say neg, build comfort, we want to show we are NOT interested in the girl

for example

PUA: "hii, i need a female opinion on something, who lies more men or women?3
HB:whatever
PUA:"i can't stay long becaus ei need to go mee up with some friends" => move to next routine

or whatever it's just a plain example



and i would also advise to read mystery's books the mystery method or the Venusian arts or style's book 'the game'. You should know at least the theory of the game.

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greetz

ice_melter

In both cases you seem to have come across as kind of predatory, creeping the girls out. I'd agree to with most of what sydarm said. First of all you should have created a [u]false time constraint[/u] by saying something like "look I can only stay for a second because I'm meeting a friend". This lets the woman know that you're not going to be hanging around her all day. Once you do this, even if the woman is initially a bit creeped out by being approached by a stranger, her guard will drop because she knows he'll be gone in a second... This simple technique goes a long way towards cutting through her defenses.

Secondly you should have had a reason for approaching her, i.e. you should have used an [u]opener[/u] (A piece of canned material designed to get you talking to a target or group). Most people use opinion openers where you approach the target/group with a question (preferable one that will spark interest in women) eg. "Who lies more, men or women?", "Do you think guys wearing eye-liner is hot or not?". It's also important to have a reason for wanting her opinion on this in the first place... you and you're friends have been discussing this all afternoon and need a female opinion or something.

If executed well an opener will usually make the group or target much more comfortable with you and allow you to transition to a routine you have worked on.

If you haven't done already read the venusian arts handbook... It's broken down in an easy-to-follow, step-by-step way and really makes all this a lot easier.