This is a bit of a tricky thing for me, but I was wondering if there were any techniques on how to prevent myself from falling into the Friend Zone when the "in love chemical" is running through our brains. I read that you should be having sex with the girl on the third date, but here's what I don't get....

When I was dating my ex wife, I remember we started making out and holding hands on the second week when we were dating, and we didn't have sex until the third month of our relationship. The reason why was because we were trying to follow religious teachings, and we didn't want to move too fast. One night we were in a motel, nature took its course, and we started going at it. We were together for seven years.

Now check this out, I dated a girl for 3 weeks that I didn't kiss or hold hands with (or have sex), and we fell into the Friend Zone. Why is it that this happened so quick compared to the situation with my ex wife? Was it because we were kissing, and holding hands for three months?

I'm just trying to figure out if there's a fool proof method of staying out of the Friend Zone when dating a girl. The reason I ask this is because I want to STD screen all the girls before I have sex with them so I can raw and cream pie them. My therapist told me not to do this, because she said I'm at risk for the Friend Zone if I wait and get women tested. Is there an escalation map I can follow, or does this all depend on instinct, and nature?

When you want to catch a deer, do you ask a deer or a deer hunter? I wouldn't consult a female therapist on dating advice no matter what her position. I wrote an article about this one way of the player.

Now, its not a time thing, its a vibe thing. I've had girls I had sex with on the first night and girls who i had sex with a month later because of logistics. I've had a girl friend zone me directly after having sex in public basically after just meeting her that day. When you give off that desperate " I need you to maintain my current level of happiness" vibe, women will want to distance themselves from that. Wether you've fucked a hundred times or not at all. The thing with a banging a girl is, it gives you as the guy some leverage. Each level of compliance increases your confidence. And the more leverage you have, the less likely you will be giving off that "help me maintain my happiness vibe".

My happiness is paramount. So if a girl starts behaving in a way that makes me feel "needy" in anyway, she either has to make a change or I have to leave. I'm not going to allow her to do anything thats going to affect my happiness, because my happiness is what this relationship is built upon. Happiness trickles from the top on downwards. When the king is happy, the kingdom is happy; he's hosting feast, sparring lives, and giving gifts. When the king is unhappy, he's cutting heads and rationing out the food. So it is his job to ensure that the kingdom is doing all it can to make him happy first so he is best fit to do his job as king.

Hold women to the standard of either helping you maintain your level of happiness or just staying out the way of it and you won't be friend zoned. Not to mention, the willingness to walk away will prevent a lot of this. See this link: viewtopic.php?f=25&t=190620

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So you're telling me there's no clear cut way to completely avoid the Friend Zone? Its all based on instinct, emotions, and nature?

Thats like saying is there a clear cut way to make every single woman you approach on the street your girlfriend everytime.

Just be willing to walk and hold women to the standard of making you happy and you won't have to worry about it. Give a woman jurisdiction over your life and happiness and you will get what you have gotten.

Control your emotions, they're just chemical reactions. Theres no real truth behind them, its just natures way of getting you to mate.

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What are you doing? Asking the girl if she has an STD? That takes you 3 months?

My guess is it actually has nothing to do with your desire to "cream pie a girl" and more so the fact of your religious up bringing. You've been told to wait to get to know each other and be in a relationship (if not married) before having sex. Girls don't like that.

Girls love to be desired. They love when a man loses control of what is "right or wrong" and worships her entire body like a Goddess.

You refusing a girl the ravishing of her pussy is something that a friend would do. A lover on the other hand... he would give the girl what she wants.

You need to change your frame of mind.

The way you don't fall into the friendzone is to make a move.

All the friendzone is, is a lack of sexual attraction. You can fade in and out of the "friendzone" as well.

Basically, the girl is initially interested and if you don't act, she may lose interest. How long it takes to lose interest is pretty random. It's partially based on how into you she is in the first place. But I've seen girls tepidly interested in a guy for months, and be intensely interested for all of a day. In my personal experience, I've had girls with windows that lasted between weeks and minutes(no joke).

It has nothing to do with religious anything. Most of the girls I date are good little church girls. They kiss on the first date, no exceptions. Many are up for sex on the first date.

As for STDs, stop worrying about it. STDs are no big deal. Seriously. Nearly all of them are either something you can treat with a pill or a shot, or you won't even know you have it. About the only thing that's serious is AIDs. Only about 1/25,000 white/asian women have it. So you should be good. Even among black women it's only 1/1,200. And it's strongly tied to poverty to boot.

I literally never wear a condom. Ever. If she insists the first time, I go ahead and oblige. Then tell her I think it broke, does she want me to stop, first thing she's really into it. Never had a "Yeah, stop" request. Tell her you're taking it off and keep going. She will never even request you wear one again.

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RSDTyler

I see. In other words, you have to let nature take its course. If you want to hold hands, then do it. If you want to kiss her, then do it. If you want to have sex with her, talk with her about it.

My therapist said dating is about risk taking. She says as a man, I need to be making the first move. I think as long as I get over fear of rejection and insecurities, I'll be good.

So when I'm dating a girl, just ask for sex on the third date? I just got done breaking up with a girl, and when she was laying in her room, I wanted to go pound her so bad. I need to act on my desires, and stop hesitating.

So in other words, I need to stop hesitating, and ask the girl for sex. I just broke up with a girl, and I wanted to have sex with her on the 3rd week, but I hesitated due to fear of rejection, and insecurities. Now, I am regretting not making any moves on her, because I lost her. Forever.

You forgot herpes. There's no cure for that, and condoms wont protect against that. My therapist said that I will get Friend Zoned if I ask a girl to get tested before sex. She gave the suggestion of asking the girl if she had any STDs, and then using condoms if that is my option. How do you not get paranoid when you're having sex with all these women without a condom? If you catch AIDs, you're dead. If you get herpes, you're stuck with it for life.

I didn't forget Herpes. Herpes is nothing. %80 of women aged 40 and over have it. And %7 of women die as virgins. SO, of women who ever have sex, about 5/6 have herpes. Take out women with only ONE sex partner, and you're sitting at nearly %100.

You WILL get Herpes. Odds are, you already have it, and don't notice it. The only way to not get herpes is to die a virgin or(at best) get married as a virgin and never have sex with anyone else and hope your wife doesn't either.

I'm not even slightly worried about AIDS. As I said, 1/25,000 white women have it. That's not a concern for me. And of them, most of them are likely overweight and poor. Considering I only date girls from a good background and slim, the odds are probably less than one in a hundred thousand. There are hundreds of things more likely to kill me than AIDS.

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RSDTyler

How bad is herpes? I heard its painful itching that comes and goes, and the medication is expensive. It looks like if I'm going to be a PUA, I will have to accept getting it.

Please stop using STD's an excuse. If you don't want the friendzone. You need to make a move. Worry about STD's when you get them.

That's like worrying about thieves before you even open up a business. Condoms and security guards will decrease the chance of theft and std but it happens.

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I have no idea. I'm sure I have it. Or else I'm immune to it. But in either case, I'm not even aware I have it, aside from looking at numbers and being quite sure I have to. That's how herpes is for most people. They don't even realize they have it. Some people apparently get cold sores and outbreaks initially and I believe they are somewhat painful and tender. But they also go away after a few weeks and don't come back for like a year or two the first time and then become even more rare after that.
They do make some type of prescription for year round SPAM, but I've never taken it or know anyone who has. I don't think most people actually need it.

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RSDTyler