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That last part is the exact problem!! YOU have to love yourself, then a girl will love you. As cliche as that sounds, you have to be worthy of love before you get it, not after.
Try affirmations, and go watch some RSD videos...
But I'm so ugly!!! What is to love?
I'm an antisocial monster. I lack empathy. And I'm now just trying to feign empathy to get in women's pants.
So that I can fuck them for 2 minutes with my half-flaccid dick and then demand they give me a blowjob. Granted, I would eat them out all day.
(except for the times when I can go for an hour with the help of desensitizing spray and Canadian Viagra)
You need to find out what causes your ED - it might be stage freight from your low self esteem.
That's a good question to ask yourself: What's to love?
I tell this to everybody, ASK YOURSELF GOOD QUESTIONS!
Before I meet a girl, or go out approaching or whatever I may be doing... I ask myself things like:
1. Why do I have so much more chance than most guys? (Brain immediately says something like "97% of guys don't understand women, but you do")
2. What makes me a catch? (Brain: You're clever, witty, intelligent, fairly good looking, tall, and your game is great)
3. Why am I so confident? (Brain: Cause you've had good reactions from so many people, and you've given up caring if you get a bad reaction, cause you know that 90% of people will be impressed with what you have to say)
If you ask yourself a question, your brain will answer it. Ask yourself what your name is, your brain will tell you. Don't ask yourself stupid questions.
If you do end up asking yourself a bad question, you'll probably get some good advice on how to improve, though... if I ask myself "why wouldn't girls like me?"
Answer: I haven't been gaming as much lately so things like eye contact aren't as strong as they used to be, I have no job which may make me sound like I'm a benefit scrounger (I do make good enough money at the moment to keep me in college and buy me nice enough things, I quit my job...)