Quote:
Quote:
which girl is the most likely to put out vs the girl with the most value..
-Derron Fox
Mr. Fox,
I was at a party tonight and couldn't stop thinking about your statement above. As an anthropology major it is quite fascinating.
You guys all want sex. Yet a woman who loves sex as much as you do and can't wait to have sex with you is not valuable. Rather, women who will make you jump through hoops and wait an arbitrary amount of time before having sex are "valuable." Presumably because they have had fewer sex partners and have less experience in the bedroom. Less experience, arbitrary waiting periods are valuable.
Logically, it doesn't make much sense unless you look at it from the viewpoint of evolutionary biology.
In any case, after lurking around here from time to time I've learned that if I am interested in a relationship with a guy, it is critical to wait at least 5 dates to have sex with him less I be perceived as low value.
This could not be any further from the truth, and you're going to be greatly disappointed when you make a guy wait until the 5th date or longer and he still leaves you the very next day, as if you had sex with him in the first five seconds.
I tell women all the time.. "Sex isn't all I want, unless that's all you have".
It is not for you to wait for a man to tell you what your value is. YOU have to know your value before you open your legs, and if you know that and openly display that it doesn't matter when you have sex with him.
The problem is that women think sex is all men want. And so they hold onto it like it's some treasure that can't be found anywhere else. But thats not what men truly want, they'll just take it if that's all you have to offer. But a woman that knows how to have sex with a man's mind outside of the bedroom is seldom pressured into sex or left after sex.
I did an entire 30 minute discussion on this in a live video recorded radio interview that you can look up on vimeo here:
https://vimeo.com/80705401
The problem is... women will hold on and not have sex with a guy that have nothing else to offer. And the guy is just sticking it out because he's already invested 3-4 dates into the girl. So he'll wait a few more just to cash in on his investment before he exits. So waiting or not waiting is no sure way to prevent it. If I dig in a gold mine that provides gold in the first five minutes, I don't leave the mine behind if there are more levels and more gold. I will continue to mine and mine so long as it is providing me with gold.
Now I will be angry at the mine that I dug for 2 months into just to find one lousy piece of gold. So if sex is your only piece of gold- your only understanding of what you can offer a man you're the 2 month mine.
But if you have a unlimited source of gold, it doesn't matter when you start coughing it up, i'm going to cherish and continue to mine for a life time.
Learn you value. Learn what you can provide a man with. And learn WHAT ELSE men want or you will be left after sex no matter how long you make a man wait. Because you will have nothing left to offer him.
I find it funny that as much as women study men they still have no idea what it is we want. Most men don't know either. They don't know what's driving their desire for women. They don't know what it is they really want them for. So they take sex and leave in disappointment when it's all over.
Edit:
Another thing you have to understand is that, no guy wants to hurt a woman. No guy wants to lose all his feelings for her after he has sex with her. He would love to have sex with the girl he's been pursuing and then fall completely in love with her. He would love for his search of "the one" to come to an end so he could completely focus on other areas of his life but if he doesn't FEEL that way after sex, because YOU become valueless from a lack of understanding what do you want him to do? One of the awkward things a man has to do is kick a woman out of his house right after sex. Some men will even let them stay the night, and cuddle with them even at the mercy of the mans own discomfort because he doesn't want to hurt her feelings. We don't want to hurt you, we don't want to leave you after sex, but if you have nothing else, what do you want us to do? Only a fool will continue drilling for oil in a place that has shown to have no more oil. You're asking us to be fools.
Too many women are trying to be men now, and you're getting all of these disappointing one night stands because of it. You haven't tapped into the power the lays within femininity. Our society hasn't highlighted it, and so women don't know they have it. All they see as "powerful" and "worthwhile" is trying to be a man. And thats great for you guys, but its awful when it comes to beginning a relationship. Opposites attract. A man needs to come together with his polar opposite to properly function. If both sides of the battery were flat or if both sides has the little point.. there would be no power.
So its not you guys fault necessarily. Its the construction of society. But it isn't necessarily mens fault either.
Just know your value, and study what men want more than you study what men are.
_________________
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