FOCUSSES 15/05/2015

- Engage friends more for night game
- Stop leaning over (day game AND night game)
- Also stop walking backwards in order to accomodate the woman is walking forwards (day game)
- Balance between smooth and steady vs direct and agressive: tactile aggression
- Be sure to make a direct move at the high point of sexual escalation
- Challenge girls who are giving you shit tests
- Gunwitch method: a simple recognition of the fact that women have sexual instincts as well. This is the same mindset which drives you into acting on your OWN biologically ingrained sexual aggression WITHOUT violating your social intuition. THIS is the best and most results-oriented mindset and THIS is what Gunwitch talks about when he discusses the 'subtly-confident man'.
- Vocal projection and commands (the two go hand in hand)
- Communicate and establish a baseline of rules with your wingmen (ChocolatePUA's suggestion)
- Keep moving around / get the girl to follow you (Chocolate PUA)
- Don't take it too personally when girls get bitchy, this is what the night club environment does to them (Chocolate PUA)
- Don't apologise too much / don't display too many insecurities (mainly day game, e.g. "I'm sorry, you just caught my eye and I had to come over and say hi").

Ok, exercise that BlackPhantom suggested for me to improve natural approach for day game, I'm gonna post it here to remind myself to do it. And then Pebble can stick it.

NIGHT GAME 17/05/2015

Met up with a few wings last night. I'd been recommended by a previous wing who was coming along also - TG (tall guy). TG had asked me if he could pass my number on and I agreed. So TG passed my number on and before I knew it my phone was buzzing and I was talking to a massive chatterbox who said he'd done pick-up for 9 years. He wanted to know all of this stuff like, "what my 'level' is at pick-up", "how serious I am at improving at pick-up", "what my philosophy is on pick-up", etc.

"My 'philosophy' on pick-up is HAVE FUN, GET OUT THERE AND TALK TO SEXAY WIMMINZ!!!"

Is what I wanted to say but didn't.

When I got there most of the guys were late and to be honest I felt guilty for shying out of approaching during this solo window of opportunity. But when they arrived it soon became clear that these guys were significantly worse than me. Most of the night they were coming up with excuses not to approach and justifying with pick-up theory and shit like "don't want to give the girl too much male validation" or "this isn't a logistically friendly venue in which to approach". The chatterbox on the phone was a thin white guy, average height in a nice looking waist-coat. I'll call him WC.

For this reason I took it upon myself to go ahead and approach LIKE. FUCKING. CRAZY. I'm not interested in excuses not to talk to a woman. To be honest the music was loud and my wings were trying to say stuff to me but when I start to get into the zone I can slowly turn into something of a nobhead and just get totally absorbed into my whole world, singing, dancing and totally oblivious to anything that's not fun. It's just how I get into the vibe. It is, in fact, the ONLY way to get into the vibe.

I just kept dancing then did worked up some dancefloor routine. Getting behind the girls that are dancing and shouting "WOOOH" just seems to work like a fucking bomb. So I did this and then quickly turned my attention to the friend, gave her a spin and pulled her in. She was so compliant I was amazed and actually didn't know how to respond. I've decided not to go in for the kiss-close immediately when this happens, here's why: getting the kiss with dancefloor routine is too easy. When I do it, the interaction /escalation goes nowhere fast after the actual kiss.

In future what I'm going to do is go for the spin and then if she is into it, I will hoist her up like RSD Tyler does in this vid, see

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kx3rkgqTWJ8#t=5m15s

Some more dance routines and stuff that I seriously need to get practicing, since the whole twirl the girl and kiss her charade is getting pretty old and lame.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHG6YVaLIFQ

Next time I DO go in for a kiss, it's just going to be a peck on the lips: SHE can move in to ME if she wants more than that.

Well anyway, for a while I was mainly going in direct and stating attraction. It's way too loud to use anything complicated. What generally happens here is, most girls initially balk so I have to figure some way to work past the shit tests. Since we're in a night club, I generally do this non-verbally, then go to hold her hand. Either I will do this by introducing myself, or I will just move in. Whatever happens, there's no one-size-fits-all strategy. You just have to be prepared to get rejected and you have to prepare to persist and figure out how to defuse the occasional bitchy girl shield.

I realised that one of the guys in the pick-up crowd had more balls than I had given him credit for. His style was indirect and conversational and he would be in sets for anything from 10 minutes to half an hour. I on the other hand generally just approach A LOT and find out pretty quickly if the girl is interested or not. I can't really be bothered chewing the fat and running elaborate game routines like the cube. Sometimes it's ambiguous as to whether she likes me; I haven't really figured out what to do in these situations. I generally eject (somewhat uncertainly!) from the set because I really hate giving girls the opportunity to reject me directly! Generally I tell myself that I will go back over later on during the night when she might appreciate a second approach attempt from the mysterious guy that's just left her. But I rarely follow up on this so I'm seriously requiring a change of strategy here. Perhaps these are the types of situations where stronger verbal game is required.

I had also agreed to meet BT up that night and was looking forwards since there was only really me and WC doing any significant approaching. And I think WC felt like his ego and status as 'leader of the group' was being threatened by my being there a little. TG and another short guy (SG) approached some as well but they were still a low energy vibe. Two of the other guys in the group were pretty boring and unimpressionable on the whole. Harsh, but true. I tried to talk one of them into going up to a girl and getting down on one knee to propose but to no avail - even after I did this routine myself.

BT was on the other side of town with his mates so I persuaded the other guys to come and meet him and after some gentle persistence they agreed. So we went down and I remember WC immediately tried to rock my boat by walking into a different club as BT, putting me in a compromising position. One of the betas in the groups tried to move into the same club as WC but the bouncers wouldn't let him in - "too many guys", apparently. This worked to my favour and we ended up in the same club as BT. But I just told WC that we were trying desperately to get in to the same club as him or whatever, so he wouldn't feel like this was a challenge to his authority.

I'm being a bit too mean to WC because he didn't take it personally or anything and in all fairness to the man he had good game. Just a different style to my own. If I see him again I will have to navigate the social dynamics a bit better so that our egos don't collide as much.

Anyway, I saw BT in the club and he looked tired, for a change. He was telling me it was pretty dead but as far as I could see the night was still young and the club was full of hot babes. With the energy I brought to the table, BT was back in the zone and we were raving on the dance floor with his mates, while the other pick-up guys were talking to each other in the smoking area. BT had brought his friends with benefits and her hot friend. Both girls were making eyes at me at various points in the night but they both looked like the type of girls that would require pretty solid game to get with.

BT told me that he never does dancefloor routine unless I'm around and that this is my strong point so I should go and game some of the girls in that way and I do. I get a few flakes but then I see two 7s in an orange dress (OD) and a blue dress (BD) and tell one of them she is gorgeous. She is like,

"whatever"

BD gives me that 'what a weirdo' stare that I've seen one time too many and know how to defuse all to easy. Before I know it she is rubbing against me very deliberately and almost aggressively as I'm dancing with my mates. Eventually I turn around twirl her and pull her in for a kiss close. I think our lips maybe touch or something but she is soon pulling away, so I PUSH her away. Not hard, just playfully.

And then she is doing the same thing: dancing around me, pushing herself onto me, and I know that this charade is going to continue for a little while. Push-pull continues for a couple minutes between the two of us. I'm not sure if this is demonstrating higher or lower value to the girls that BT has brought along. She says to me

"You're trouble"

And don't I fucking know it.

Eventually BD walks in front of me and starts pushing my head down, telling me to get down on her. I don't want to obey her commands so I pull her hand off my head and she starts to get angry. She keeps on putting her hand on my head, trying to drive me down and I keep pulling it off, wondering what I've got myself into. She does it again and this time when I pull her hand off, she scratches my forehead cutting it so I tell her to go away and my friend (tall guy, pretty alpha) stands between us.

Do I want to fuck her? Yes. But do I give her the attention she wants? No, because I believe that that is just going to give her the validation she requires and repel her. I would prefer to simply maintain my own frame. Maybe I'm wrong, but I seriously HATE anything that fucks with my frame. If there is one thing I ask of my friends it's "don't fuck with my frame" - don't be all touchy-feely when I'm in the zone, don't make me lean down to your level, don't force me to be constantly making concessions, or breaking eye contact. That's all I ask: don't. fuck. with. my. frame.

Later in the night BD is drunk and she is cockteasing guys in my group and other guys around me on the dancefloor.

Don't let it get to you

I tell myself

She is just trying to make you jealous

She is indeed trying to make me jealous, she gets other guys to drink from her bottle then she even tries to push the bottle in my face and I just push it out of the way, give her the v-sign and tell her to fuck right off. She looks pissed.

"FACK OFF"

She shouts back at me and then walks away temporarily acting like she is not phased but I can see she has been phased. All of this which signifies the fact she is highly interested in me but I would prefer to maintain a strong frame than to feed her ego by giving her the male validation she is seeking. I don't have perfect risk assessment, but I calculate that giving her any attention is not going to result in a pull for me and like I say, I don't want to damage my frame. So I just stand tall and keep dancing: no matter what, I'm in my own world AND THERE AIN'T NOBODY THAT'S GOING TO FUCK WITH IT. Besides all this attention I'm getting could be working to my favour since there is a girl in my group noticing (not BT's fuck-buddy - her friend) and making eyes. She is much hotter than BD but I'm making the mistake of putting her on a pedestal.

At one point, we are making eyes and I can feel the sexual escalation. Then BD spots this and she is moving in trying to get my attention.

Just ignore her, just ignore her

I think to myself. But I give in for just that nanosecond and that nanosecond is sufficient for BD to move in front of me to 'talk' to the girl I'm with.

"That girl was fucking annoying,"

BT says to me at a later point in the night, and I agree.

Since I can't seem to shake off BD, I head into the smoking area and find TG and SG. We talk for a bit before BT comes over and introduces himself. SG is kinda patronising at this point, which I find a bit annoying, and he's like,

"Sorryyyy...who are you?"

I immediately interject because I have high respect for BT:

"This is my friend, this is BT"

And then SG is just like,

"Oh...I seeee, he's your frieeend."

Which irks me again, I shoot BT a look that conveys a kind of apologetic excuse on SG's behalf. BT seems to understand and I calmly explain to SG,

"BT is into the whole pick-up thing as well."

"Oh right,"

SG responds.

5 minutes later, I'm talking with BT and BT asks if these guys are those kinds of quiet / reserved types and I pause and explain yes, but also trying to justify SG I explain that SG has made a few approaches. SG then comes over at this point and I turn around to him, directly, and say,

"I haven't seen you approach yet, go and approach someone."

SG gives me a curious glance and says,

"Not at all?"

"Well ... go and approach AGAIN."

I say. He looks hesitant, so I repeat it as a semi-humorous command which I know never fails in situations like these:

"Yes, go approach."

BT thinks this is funny so he starts doing the same, and we are both just like,

"Approach. Approach."

Until finally he succeeds to peer pressure and works his way into a group of hot girls.

This may sound cruel, but he WAS being highly patronising earlier and the way I see it, I was being kind by providing him an opportunity to prove he wasn't a total dick to BT. The rest of the night, I don't really approach much else but I'm in a high energy state and just dance with my mates which is fine. To be honest I'm too distracted by people talking to me and stuff to go out of my way to pick-up girls, but in any case I did a solid 20 approach minimum last night. Everything was so wild and chaotic I hardly have a clear picture of what happened, so what I'm writing now seems pretty frantic, but I'm just making a record of it all while it comes to my mind. Meeting BT tomorrow.

SELF-ANALYSIS

Fuck self-analysis. Everything I did was awesome and I'm awesome and you're awesome and I'm gonna keep on doing everything the way I've been doing and go get some pussy.

Ok...out.

FUCK YES.
:'(

You kids grow up so fast

[/quote]
Do that. You want to ensure that you guys are working together, feeding off each other's energy and best points rather than being concerned about whose dick is bigger.
Good, good. That's exactly what you need in the nightclub environment.
Fuck it. I think you should have made out with her and tried for a phone number. Likely that you wouldn't necessarily have gotten it, but pushing every interaction is what you should be doing here.
I know you were in your zone, having a good time, and trying to get everyone else to have a good time. But trying to force/demand someone to do something is not what should be happening here. As you said, you made it semi-humourous, but it may have had the opposite effect here

Anyway, great report. You had FUN and ENJOYED yourself. That's most important. Now the trick is to bring OTHER WOMEN into that zone, draw them in, pump their state then pull.

Fantastic fucking field report.

Haha, I totally should have said that. I remember at one point one SG was telling me why a certain approach was logistically impossible or some shit about pick-up theory that gets you way too much into your own head and makes it very difficult to approach. At the time, I was just like,

"Yah, yah. Totally,"

Not really hearing what he was saying because of how loud the music. I should have just been like,

"My 'philosophy' on pick-up is HAVE FUN, GET OUT THERE AND TALK TO SEXAY WIMMINZ!!!"
Haha. Getting the kiss IS easy, getting the lay ... now that's a challenge. I'm actually beginning to find that going for the kiss too soon can fuck up the escalation. The other night, BT suggested a set because he's trying to figure out my dancefloor routine. I normally tell people "just give the girl a twirl" when they ask, but I know there are a few other subtleties going on.

For example, the set BT suggested was difficult from the outset because she had her back turned to me and all her friends were surrounding her so it was impossible for me to make a direct approach from the front. I even had to lean over and tap her on the shoulder, then when I put my hand out, initially she was reluctant, so I gave her the rock eyebrow, which is often sufficient to break even the iciest shields and barriers. She complies and then I give her the twirl, which she does slowly, so I can feel this interaction isn't going anywhere so rather than pull her in, I use a bit of push-pull and give her the cheekiest playful push on the shoulder I think I've ever done. She laughs, and her friends all laugh and she turns around to demonstrate on her friend the exact same routine I just used on her.

So, these are little variables that the people around aren't going to see: they just see me spinning her around and think,

"Oh, well that looked easy, I wonder why he didn't pull her in for a kiss at this point - I TOTALLY would have."

But of course, there are all kind of logistical barriers and subtle movements, e.g. you don't just spin the girl round. First you lift her hand quite high and you have to have hold of her hand in the first place. And before you even approach, you need clear, steady eye contact. What messed up the above interaction was that I first needed to get her attention from behind. Everything needs to be done slow and steady, one step at a time, without losing your composure but keeping a positive / fun vibe.

But talking with you, Chocolate, this is just me teaching my grandma how to suck eggs, I'm sure. Still, anyone looking for solid dance routines would do well to check out the video link I posted. Highly simple but highly effective.
Sure, sure. This guy seems like he wants to be in control a lot though. I remember him keeping me on the phone for like 15 minutes before I met up so he could 'screen' me and figure out what my 'level' is at pick-up. And he is trying to organise collective trips and hotel rooms in other cities which I don't really have the money for. He sent me and a few other guys a bunch of emails / texts last night trying to establish 'ground rules' and 'trips' in advance for next weekend that we have to let him know about a few days in advance.

Like I say, he is a nice enough guy but a bit too much of a control freak. To be honest, I just want to meet up with wings like BT, and LJ and their friends for fun. I don't really want to go to other cities yet, or if I do it will be on my OWN terms and conditions and without all of these little agendas. Well, in any case, I told WC by email that I'm unlikely in the near future to go to other cities for pick-up (where I live is just fine!). However, if he wants to meet nearby again with his ego-validating little followers then that is fine, we can do so.
Funny thing - I WAS trying to make out with her, and came close a few times. But she was playing weird push-pull games to which I was responding with push-pull of my own until eventually she did that thing where she accidentally slashed my head with her gnarly finger nails - OUCH! At this point I was just so pissed off, I didn't give a fuck anymore and would prefer to maintain a solid frame rather than lose my integrity with push-pull that turns into a needy requirement for ego-validation. This is exactly what happened to her because she was constantly being a pest for like 30 minutes and even my friends thought she was annoying, cockteasing the other guys in my group, pushing her empty drink in our faces and constantly rubbing against us, 'accidentally on purpose'. I think I got the worst of the stick just because I told her to fuck off.
I know.

You have to understand I was slightly mirked with the guy's semi-pretentious attitude, especially after I introduced him to BT. People often think I'm a nice, unassuming guy but they see a different side to my personality in contexts such as these. I CAN be a dick sometimes, especially in a nightclub environment when I'm surrounded by hot-headed egos. Sometimes it is the only way to survive in these situations. It is not who I am naturally, I guess you could say that I'm still 'Mr. Nice Guy' on the whole but people need to realise that there is a limit to which you can push me. In any case, he went over and approached and the interaction seemed to go smoothly and he earned a little respect from us after showing a somewhat condescending attitude, so really and truly, this was me being kind to him.
Cheers buddy, hope you liked the casual fucking swearing as I was still slightly drunk and 'in the zone' when I wrote this haha

You're right about the kiss thing - If you get TOO physical on the dancefloor ironically that can fuck you up. The thing is here, after you get the attraction, time to move into qualifying/emotional connection stage. You don't want to stay on the dancefloor for too long. Location/venue bouncing is a great way to get away from the dancefloor and do that. Keep in mind, if she's got friends, you have to convince THEM to move with you as well, so it's imperative that you're friendly with her friends or else they WILL fuck up any chance of moving her away from the bright lights and stimuli.

Ok, found it:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gi5u4P_JzbU[/youtube]

This video along with the videos below are going to be my bibles for non-verbal seduction:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHG6YVaLIFQ[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emWQAPNztd4[/youtube]

I posted the latter two of them before, but I just want to make SURE I have them here as strong reference points, because THIS is the kind of shit that will make my game stronger.

I'm hoping to go through every video on the DanceFloorSeduction page at some point, because it is what will make my night game a lot stronger.

Ok, simple way to transition from nightclub to hotel room / your flat / whatever (I've been in need of this for a LONG time and didn't even realise it because I was waaaay too caught up with what was going on in the club and not thinking about the logistics of getting back to my place NEARLY enough ... LOL):

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNQLMygC98o[/youtube]

Ok, so to summarise, here is what to say:

1. Afterparty, after party, come on let's go!
2. Where is it? Just round the corner, come on, come on let's go!

Simples!

I love Julien Blanc...I don't give a damn what people say about him. He's the BEST. SMOOTHEST. MOFO. ON. THE. PLANET.

Peace out - JHA91.

DAYGAME 19/05/2015

This morning I planned to head out an hour earlier to do the observation exercise (see exercise recommended by Black Phantom at the top of the page) before I met BT to do some winging. But after a late night last night doing a few too many computer game (LOL) I ended up pushing the snooze button a bit too much for that. As I headed out to meet BT, there was some generally odd weather and occasional outpour of hail. I was thinking of cancelling the meet with BT (what women would be outside in this kind of weather?) when the hail stopped.

I got there, and BT was late - typical! So as the sun came out I put my jacket down next to the fountain to go and do some solo approaches. But I lost my nerve as the girl I chose gave me a funny stare. As I walked back, my jacket had been blown into the fountain...even more bad luck! BT turned up after a fashion and laughed at my misfortune, so we wounded up grabbing a plastic bag for from Morrison's to put my jacket into.

We are walking down the high-street and I am blabbering away at BT who is an exceptionally good listener (lol) when a hottie in a leather jacket walks past and BT tells me to go approach. She has already walked past and is walking briskly so I have to kind of awkwardly jog / power walk to catch up to her. Then I hold up my bag and say,

"Look at this, I'm having to drop my coat into puddles just to talk to you."

She just gives me that weird stare that informs me I have just been talking to a wall, not a person, so I persist with,

"Sorry, I just saw you and had to come over introduce myself."

To no avail.

Sigh, women are such fickle creatures...

BT asks about the approach and he tells me that he will hold my jacket for me when I do approaches in future. I pick a target for BT - a hot red head and BT follows her into a bookstore to talk with her. He casually stands near her for a few seconds looking at the books before he signals her to take the headphones out. I'm surreptitiously following behind, so I hear the opening line which is simply,

"This is random but I just saw you and had to say hello."

His interaction is a lot more successful: he has her talking for at least a minute then ejects with her number - what a dick!

Well, we do a few more approaches each, I remember BT even tells me to approach a girl on the phone but I'm not willing to do that so he goes over and does it instead, haha.

We are in the mall, when I see a woman leaning over the balcony looking at her phone. I walk over and standing next to her / leaning over the balcony ask her,

"How long have you been waiting for"

She laughs.

"A little while...why? Waiting for who?"

"The next handsome man to walk into your life, of course."

I reply. She laughs and tells me she's waiting for her boss. Looking up at the grey sky through the glass ceiling, I ask her what she is doing on a 'weatherly' day like this (yeah, I kinda just made up a word on the spot ).

"Oh not much, blah, blah, why what about you?"

"Oh just chilling, talking to cute girls, chewing the fat with strangers."

I tell her with a devilish grin. She says something about spitting off the balcony at people walking underneath which is kinda weird but I tell her I'm always scared walking under these balconies of people dropping pennies.

"Or spit."

She says.

"Yah, but at least that way I get to keep my life."

I joked back. I ask her for her number but she says she has a boyfriend, so I use my standard line which is,

"No, you don't - that's a LIE."

She laughs and assures me that it isn't before I politely eject with,

"Nice to meet you."

I tell BT about the 'boyfriend destroyer' (lol I can't help using pick-up terminology these days) I just used and he tells me a few of his own lines.

"How long have you been in a relationship? What, 2 months? Well THAT'S not a serious relationship."

I laugh and add to that,

"Or if she says 2 years ... well THAT'S a pretty dull affair."

BT approaches his second ginger and gets his second number.

"You're doing pretty well with the gingers today,"

I tell him.

"I know, gingers are AWESOME."

He laughs.

Next up, me and BT are standing in front of a cake stall, and BT is asking me which one he should get. Then he asks the cute blonde girl next to us for her opinion and they flirt for 30 seconds or so, but she doesn't give him her number or anything.

Me and BT are then chatting / leaning against the pillar next to the cake stall when I see two girls with shades on their head. They walk past and I ask one of them,

"Are those shades fashion accessories or do they have a practical purpose?"

"What?"

She replies - she is European.

"Do you wear those shades to look good or do you actually use them to block out the sun?"

I rephrase.

"Yes, yes."

She taps me on the arm patronisingly while I attempt to state attraction / touch her arm back and then she walks off.

"Oh well, they aren't that great anyway."

BT reassures me. I don't get the impression he thinks I used the best of lines but he is not really one to judge verbal content on the whole, since his philosophy on 'opening lines' is simply, "it's not what you say...it's how you say it."

We're walking out of the department store, back into the main part of the mall when BT spots a cute mousey blonde walking past us BACK into the department store and commands me to approach. BT is ALWAYS with the awkward logistical situations, LOL. Well, I don't want to look like a pussy, so once again I find myself testing my own aerobic fitness to talk to a woman. She walks all the way around the corner and all the way into a clothing store.

I honestly can't remember my 'opening' line, I don't think about it so much these days, so it was probably, just

"I think you're cute."

Then I went to shake her hand after she told me her name and tried to get her to do a twirl (this ain't the dance floor I know - it just happens to be one of a very few successful moves in my personal arsenal, I know, HAH!). She won't do the twirl, and she tells me she has a 'boyfriend' when I awkwardly move in for the number, so I eject with another polite,

"Well, it was nice to meet you"

These kinds of responses are getting all too familiar.

BT tells me he had more issues with approach anxiety than me when he was at my stage. I tell him that my main sticking points are with conversation / escalation. Not really something I'm proud of tbh, I'd rather be a little shy and good at convo than an audacious robotic killing machine with no verbal prowess. He laughs,

"But you can hardly shut up when you're talking to me!"

I concede, but then shit about women and pick-up is not really something I would talk about to the girls I'm generally flirting with.

Next approach, me and BT spot a girl with glasses headed into a women's bag store. BT suggests her but I feel kinda awkward walking into a woman's bag store so he gives me an idea of what to do. I walk in and find two different bags that would suit a woman. The girl with glasses is filtering through the jewellery and I am shuffling through the bags delaying for time until she comes near me, which takes a little while! When she does walk past, I'm forced to awkwardly lean forwards at an odd angle to talk to her and I ask her jokingly which of the two bags would suit me better. She just looks at me kind of awkward then walks off.

This is another one of those situations where I might as well be talking to a wall.

The cashier who is hotter than this girl notices my failing pick-up approach but rather than deter I just proceed to state attraction / the reason for approaching to the girl with glasses (I'm used to random people overhearing my pick-up attempts at this stage in the game: I just power through when this happens because I know it demonstrates confidence). It has no effect and the girl with glasses simply walks off. Then the hot cashier asks if she may be of assistance so I tell her I'm fine. Who knows, maybe my approach would have been more successful on her

CONCLUSION
Not a bad day for approaches. I maybe did 10 approaches rather than my standard 20 approaches that I do when I'm with a wing but I feel I put more conscientious thought / effort into these approaches. Having BT as my wing is great but I should probably start doing solo daygame once in a while again because using wing men can become something of a crutch. I don't know what pointers/tips I can give myself except that I should maybe stand a bit taller / project my voice a bit more in general. Otherwise, I guess it's just good that I'm approaching and STILL staying with the game and for the most part enjoying it in spite of all these rejections.

Ok, this is an important video for me because I have been trying to bring high value to interactions but in a way that is slightly edgey / nervey. I think following this video will be good for that, and it will be good for my self-improvement in general:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lsdtt-7zukQ[/youtube]

I also want to announce something here: when I get to page ten of this journal, I will not be posting in the journal or on this forum here-on out. Page ten will be my last post in this thread. Why? Because I am not particularly feeling feeling the need to track my records for Pick-Up anymore. Approaching hot women, getting rejected by hot women ... it is all a part of who I am now. I have confidence that I will do it again, and again and again until I succeed. Not just because I want to succeed so badly but because it improves who I am as a person, it improves my interaction skills as a human being, it improves my confidence / is very empowering to do (as Mich mentioned earlier in this thread) and most importantly, it is FUN. I want to thank everyone who has given me advice and posted in this thread and will continue to do so until I reach this landmark.

Peace out.

You don't want to be ugly man. There's probably nothing wrong with your personality other than you THINK there's something wrong with it. You are communicating it to them. I'm boring, my personality is fucked, and they're gonna pick up on that vibe.

I'm no expert, someone else might have better advice.. but if you've tried, crashed and burned.. then why not 'give up' and when the interaction is done, they've declined.. ASK THEM WHY? You won't see them again and maybe you can get something useful.. "Look, you declined giving me your number. You're not interested. Can you tell me what it is about me that turned you against giving me your number? It won't help me with you but it might help me in the future."

At least you'd have an answer.

You know what? I think that's something I'm gonna try.

I've actually thought about this before but without exactly realising it. I don't know if you have much personal experience with approaching and getting rejected yourself, but in the beginning stages what happens is a very negative gut reaction to that rejection. You start to wonder,

"Why am I getting rejected?!?? What's wrong with me??"

For the same reason, when you are a beginner, mistakenly relying on dutch courage (alcohol) and asking that cute girl in a night club who just rejected you for her opinion, what some guys will give her is a ball of total emotion:

"Why would you say no to meeeeeee!?!!"

You don't even realise the real reason for asking this question and you make the error of going about it in such a fashion rather than a more 'salesman-like' approach:

"Ok...I'm sorry to have bothered you. But if you would be so kind, would you quickly give me your opinion on something..."

Even this can be very superficial, and on a deeper level again, it is possible to state such a thing by communicating your emotions more assertively:

"Ok, that is fair enough. Actually, I have been trying this sort of thing for some time now ... I'm a bit shit really. Maybe you can help a guy like me improve his overall approach ... what do you say?"

And I guess that's the reason this sort of idea has never really occurred to me: I mean, it HAS just not in a useful format and so instinctively the notion has often been more quickly REjected than ACcepted. But only because the notion did not come to me in an ideal form.

So ... I would actually like to thank you for this gem of insight, Poet, because without necessarily realising it, you have given me an epiphany into something deeper about my own approach style in general.

Thanks bud!

No problem, man.

I know what you mean on some level. I don't have very many approaches under my belt in this chapter of my life (getting out of an intense 2 year relationship where I thought I was gonna marry this girl). But, the feeling of "what is wrong with me? Why are you rejecting me?" is one that I fight with a lot.

See, I'm the not-very-good-looking guy, at least, I was, I don't know if I still am or if it is just a crutch that I put on myself (the anorexia nervosa thing). Since, I've dated some really cute/good looking girls. Its just I've always blamed looks but really I think my problem is taking risks, escalating and taking chances. I'm more afraid of being rejected and feeling ugly.

I'll be monitoring your journal to see how this epiphany fares for you.

That's a shame. I think quite a few people would be able to learn from your pickups. Of course it's your journal to do with as you wish. Cheers