when my action goes way out of the planned..



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PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2015 10:44 am 
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im Kevin, so recently 2 weeks ago its a new term in my campus, and ive been put in the class where everyone is stranger to each other (they're juniors and handful of seniors, i failed the class so i retake it again this year, only a small groups of people know each other like 3 or 2 around).

ive been setting it right from the first to explicit my values, i wear tidy and neat shirt sometimes, or sometimes i literally dress like hooligans from "green street hooligans" movies lol, i sit in the front row from the start and always active in class but i quickly befriend some bullish-looking guy and kind of live-of-a-party-girl there, the point is i want to look that i take responsibility of my study but also that i had social proof because i think i befriend with the right folks in class, i feel like i dont need to approach the geek/nerd in class at the moment because fortunately ive been able to keep ahead of them for a moment.

it only takes a day and they already get the message i think, they ask me for anything in class (strictly class subject topics for moment), some of them went to called me sir which really put me down, the bullish-looking guy started to take his class seriously too, so im on the right path i think to start picking up.

but then i just realized yesterday i think was very rude to my target, i was concentrated about the subject because its a bit hard for me, and i barely notice she talked with a very small voice that she couldnt understand what the subject is on about, i thought she was mumbling but as she increase her voice i explained it without looking at her eyes which i think i just missed an opportunity to use opener or some kind of ice breaking words or any kind of lines (i glimpse for a while when i was describing she was more concentrated at looking to my notes rather than my eyes anw). so when the class is over i put stuff in my bag, she said thanks kev, and i said your welcome but then i realized i didnt know her name.
my questions are :
1. have i gone wrong about this?
2. is there a chance for me to come up again and start over?


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:18 am 
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You did nothing rude. You can still game in between lectures and when you have a break from your thoughts. Keep gaming her normally. Greet her again next time you see her and qualify her on how's she doing. Break some rapport to spark attraction and some tension. Start talking about things outside of class and learn about her. Build commonalities and rapport and then set up plans to see her after class, which could be study, party, some fun activity, etc.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:05 am 
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Quote:
You did nothing rude. You can still game in between lectures and when you have a break from your thoughts. Keep gaming her normally. Greet her again next time you see her and qualify her on how's she doing. Break some rapport to spark attraction and some tension. Start talking about things outside of class and learn about her. Build commonalities and rapport and then set up plans to see her after class, which could be study, party, some fun activity, etc.
thankfully, i able to read this before meeting her, what do you mean by qualifying her on hows she doing? i did ask how was the day if thats what you mean, and thought i cant seem to build tension, i still made her laugh, and no spark attraction i guess (im not sure about this lol), im going to set up plans to see her next week like you said.
although this may sound weird i did get her friend number not her, because her friend are more talktive and i dont want to ignore, wouldnt want a mother hen get in my way haha.
thanks for the advice btw, it really clears my head :D


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2015 9:36 pm 
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Yes, you can ask how her day was or how she is to get the conversation going. You're qualifying her because you're asking her a question about herself and she is investing more in the interaction by answering. Laughter is good and can be one of the signs you're creating attraction by breaking rapport. That's good you're befriending everybody, just make sure you decide your target when you go out and meet. Isolate and escalate her.

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 4:11 am 
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Quote:
Yes, you can ask how her day was or how she is to get the conversation going. You're qualifying her because you're asking her a question about herself and she is investing more in the interaction by answering. Laughter is good and can be one of the signs you're creating attraction by breaking rapport. That's good you're befriending everybody, just make sure you decide your target when you go out and meet. Isolate and escalate her.
I see, i managed to do everything you said above i think, the good news is that apparently she invited me up for group studying, the bad news is i get her IM id's and add her just to found out she has a boyfriend. Now i think all i have to do at the next group studying was concentrate on building rapport between us right? No need to bring the subject abou t her bf, i can do that just fine i think though i highly doubt if i can match her bf value in terms of financial resource, so to sum it up, would doing it to her would be a bad idea?


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 12, 2015 9:24 am 
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If she has a boyfriend, depending on how serious or committed they are, I would just build rapport and have her in your social circle so you can meet more girls and have preselection.

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