Getting Depressed for various reasons. Help



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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 4:55 am 
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Okay, so to set everything up, we need to go over my past.

I went to an all guys high school which sucked ass and i never really did that well because i was depressed. Felt like i missed out on a decent HS experience. I then really liked this girl from my town and went after her the wrong way really hard and got friend zoned. This only made my depression worse. Then after sulking and hoping her slightly less attractive friend showed a ton of interest in me so i went for it.

I was 20, she was 16 and i finally lost my virginity. I ended up staying with her for four years. It sounds nice, but two years into it, without sounding like an asshole, she got really fat, really quickly and it turned me off. She gained over 40lbs in a year and started having health problems and there were seriously times where i couldn't get it up. The problem was, outside of her looks, she was seriously fucking cool. We liked the same music and movies and everything. The one part that REALLY helped me stay with her longer was that she was bi and went to school in NYC, so for awhile i was introduced to her very liberal, very sexually curious friends and in two years, i went from being a depressed virgin to having some threesomes and even an orgy.

The problem was i actually started getting a little more confident and actively started gaming girls. I claimed in my head it was "because i missed the thrill of the hunt" but in actuality, i just flat out wasn't attracted to my girl anymore. I never cheated physically, but i definitely just became the worlds biggest flirt. And like we can all assume, this situation couldn't be prolonged forever. While she loved me, she needed and deserved a guy who would not only love hanging out with her, but also loved her intimately too. So she dumped me and i was a bit bummed for a bit, simply because that tie was severed but i got over it pretty quickly. If i recall, it took me less than two months to fully be okay and realize that this was something i wanted anyway.

I actively started making efforts to better myself and get more involved with game. I lost my relationship weight and started dressing a lot better. I made it an effort to make more friends and get new hobbies and i made a lot of progress. After 3 months, I ended up nailing this one girl from a class of mine that i always kind of had a crush on until shit got weird when i found out she had a boyfriend and he later found out i fucked his girl (theyre still together)

September of last year, i ran into another girl i had a class with and we REALLY hit it off. I'm talking everything i learned in game i used and the whole thing played out like a sappy romance novel. She was definely the hottest girl and she was smart and had her head on her shoulders. She was pretty much everything i wanted. We dated for a year and throughout the relationship i became soooo fucking beta. Throwing tantrums when she had too much on her plate and couldn't hang out (She's a nursing student), got jealous if she hung around certain guys, got mad when she wouldn't come with me to hang out with my friends, and just like that, my dream girl dumped me.

She's now in a rebound relationship with a garbage man whos the total opposite of me after we had this stupid back and fourth that she wanted me back and felt like she made a mistake but never broke NC shit. Jumped into bed with this guy to make me jealous and professes all her love for him and i stayed fucking cool the whole time.

I sit here knowing that i have to move on, that she won't come back and i've been gaming again, but i can't seem to get it right. Everytime i talk to a new girl, my ex pops in my head. I just want to kind of fuck this pain away but i can't get it done.

It really comes in hot and heavy when i run into my sticking point. I can open like no other build attraction and raise my value, but getting her to qualify, i choke and start bragging or trying to show off and they get bored. I can see myself making the mistakes but i have yet to fix them. I feel dumb and pathetic and it just makes me realize how i blew it with my ex even more.

I just don't know what to do...


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 1:25 pm 
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Have you slept with anyone since your ex?

That's priority number 1, if you ask me.

To get over someone, I'll give you advice I've previously posted on this forum - works well:

1) Delete all traces of your ex. Dump her numbers, block her FB, Twitter, Insta, etc... Block her completely.

2) Join Tinder immediately. Easy way to get dates, and seeing 100+ matches will give your ego major props... It's instant validation that other good looking girls think you're hot and are potentially dates.

3) Flirt with everyone and everything that moves. Improve yourself and your game. Join a gym and improve your body and lifestyle while you're at it. You're not working on a relationship anymore, so work on yourself instead.

4) Fuck someone else. Fuck lots of other people. The more you do, the less important this ex will be.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 2:58 pm 
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Watch this video-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06UnHtD1ZbY

It's totally true...

As for your sticking point. If you can open and start conversation like no other. Cut the conversation short
before you qualify. "Hey, its been real nice talking with you...etc. How can we continue this conversation later?"

Good luck. PM if want to discuss further


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 7:58 pm 
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Quote:
Have you slept with anyone since your ex?

That's priority number 1, if you ask me.

To get over someone, I'll give you advice I've previously posted on this forum - works well:

1) Delete all traces of your ex. Dump her numbers, block her FB, Twitter, Insta, etc... Block her completely.

2) Join Tinder immediately. Easy way to get dates, and seeing 100+ matches will give your ego major props... It's instant validation that other good looking girls think you're hot and are potentially dates.

3) Flirt with everyone and everything that moves. Improve yourself and your game. Join a gym and improve your body and lifestyle while you're at it. You're not working on a relationship anymore, so work on yourself instead.

4) Fuck someone else. Fuck lots of other people. The more you do, the less important this ex will be.
Believe me I'm trying. I've been using my Tuesday and Thursdays strictly for approaching. I feel like a mad man but it's what i need to do.

I haven't fucked anybody since and it's getting to me. And i've been using Tinder but i can seriously swipe for hours without any response. I'm not all that certain but I have a really strong feeling that it hurts that I'm mixed race. Probably get swiped left a lot as a result. To be honest. It's actually after using Tinder for an hour that i get the most depressed. Seeing all these hot women that aren't swiping yes for me when i know that in real life i could at the very least easily start a conversation sucks.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 8:02 pm 
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Quote:
And i've been using Tinder but i can seriously swipe for hours without any response. I'm not all that certain but I have a really strong feeling that it hurts that I'm mixed race. Probably get swiped left a lot as a result. To be honest. It's actually after using Tinder for an hour that i get the most depressed. Seeing all these hot women that aren't swiping yes for me when i know that in real life i could at the very least easily start a conversation sucks.

Your profile is the problem then... Provided you're a normal looking guy.

Post up your pics or a screen shot (or PM it to me if you don't want to post it up). I can tell you what's wrong with it and what to change.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 8:09 pm 
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Quote:
Watch this video-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06UnHtD1ZbY

It's totally true...

As for your sticking point. If you can open and start conversation like no other. Cut the conversation short
before you qualify. "Hey, its been real nice talking with you...etc. How can we continue this conversation later?"

Good luck. PM if want to discuss further
Oh wow this is great actually. I think i'm just being so needy that i end up screwing my mid game up simply because i don't want the conversation to end and they end up getting bored. Just like the video said, I want to get back into my zone. I know what it is and what it feels like which makes it more frustrating but i'm not quite there. Maybe cutting it short would work better


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 8:23 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
And i've been using Tinder but i can seriously swipe for hours without any response. I'm not all that certain but I have a really strong feeling that it hurts that I'm mixed race. Probably get swiped left a lot as a result. To be honest. It's actually after using Tinder for an hour that i get the most depressed. Seeing all these hot women that aren't swiping yes for me when i know that in real life i could at the very least easily start a conversation sucks.

Your profile is the problem then... Provided you're a normal looking guy.

Post up your pics or a screen shot (or PM it to me if you don't want to post it up). I can tell you what's wrong with it and what to change.
Nah I got not shame. Here's my main picture http://postimg.org/image/878532uyj/


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 8:33 pm 
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Cool -

Well, it's a selfie. It doesn't seem all that complimentary to me either... Could probably be better... though you've got your own style going on, which is kind of cool, remember that this is the pic everyone sees when they swipe. Pick your BEST picture for the first one... This doesn't seem like a good first choice to me (granted I haven't seen the other pics).

You're going to want to limit your pics on Tinder to 1 selfie... And don't make it your first pic.

You should have a couple group shots. 1 having a lot of fun with others, and one just chillin... Be smiling.

No shirtless crap. Nobody cares.

Most important: PUPPY PICTURE. Find a puppy, man. Not joking. If you don't have a puppy, find one in a park and get a picture with it. Puppy pics have probably gotten me more responses than any other pic I've used - girls will either identify with it if they're dog fans, or they'll at least think it's cute. Beyond that, if the girl has a dog, it's a great point to open them with.

Another user on here - PEBBLE - has several threads where he critiques people's Tinder profiles with really, really good accuracy. He's kind of got it nailed down. You should search for them and have a look, if you want more insight.

EDIT: Found one -- post892884.html


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 8:44 pm 
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Quote:
Cool -

Well, it's a selfie. It doesn't seem all that complimentary to me either... Could probably be better... though you've got your own style going on, which is kind of cool, remember that this is the pic everyone sees when they swipe. Pick your BEST picture for the first one... This doesn't seem like a good first choice to me (granted I haven't seen the other pics).

You're going to want to limit your pics on Tinder to 1 selfie... And don't make it your first pic.

You should have a couple group shots. 1 having a lot of fun with others, and one just chillin... Be smiling.

No shirtless crap. Nobody cares.

Most important: PUPPY PICTURE. Find a puppy, man. Not joking. If you don't have a puppy, find one in a park and get a picture with it. Puppy pics have probably gotten me more responses than any other pic I've used - girls will either identify with it if they're dog fans, or they'll at least think it's cute. Beyond that, if the girl has a dog, it's a great point to open them with.

Another user on here - PEBBLE - has several threads where he critiques people's Tinder profiles with really, really good accuracy. He's kind of got it nailed down. You should search for them and have a look, if you want more insight.

EDIT: Found one -- post892884.html
Heh... I have one other picture and it's another selfie so I guess i can see what you're saying. My Tinder game is weak.

I got a couple friends who are out of work photography majors. Maybe i should hit them up haha

I'm also wondering why you may think this one isn't that flattering. Not thinking I'm being attacked, but genuinely curious


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 9:00 pm 
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Yeah definitely not attacking you man... Trying to help.

I think it's poorly lit - almost looks grainy - and your head is covered by a hat. Sorta looks like you took it in a basement washroom.

I just think even as a selfie it could be better.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2015 9:27 pm 
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Quote:
Yeah definitely not attacking you man... Trying to help.

I think it's poorly lit - almost looks grainy - and your head is covered by a hat. Sorta looks like you took it in a basement washroom.

I just think even as a selfie it could be better.
The grainy-ness might be the instagram filter haha

I can totally see what you mean about no selfie as the first picture. I need this revamped


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2015 10:51 pm 
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Quote:
Watch this video-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06UnHtD1ZbY

It's totally true...

As for your sticking point. If you can open and start conversation like no other. Cut the conversation short
before you qualify. "Hey, its been real nice talking with you...etc. How can we continue this conversation later?"

Good luck. PM if want to discuss further
So i cut the convo short on a new girl this time and got her number. Didn't make a solid date when to meet up again but said "we should get together and continue this conversation" Handed her my phone and she typed the number in and bounced. Texted her an hour later asking how her presentation went and got radio silence.

This is getting frustrating at this point


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 29, 2015 10:58 pm 
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Totally agree with above if you want to move on.

Delete everything about her from your life
Do positive things to improve your self image
Flirt with and fuck every girl possible

Done!

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USE THIS, GET LAID TONIGHT - IT'S THAT SIMPLE!: http://universityofpickup.com


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 30, 2015 12:07 am 
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Actually she texted back but it fizzled out. I figured I'd plow a bit but i guess i came off as very needy?

Image
Image
Image
Image
Image
Image

Oh well :oops:


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 30, 2015 12:14 am 
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That actually got painful to read...

So disinterested but you kept going.

Good for you for trying - but wow, she was not having it!


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