I joined the forums because I have been having some trouble recently with the "mid-game" part of my game and wanted to get some advice and do some research online. I think it basically comes down to the fact that I'm 22 and coming out of a long term relationship (4 years) so I have less experience at this than I should at my age.

The majority of the times I go out, I get approached or get IOI's by 6s, 7s and 8s. Sometimes I can just tell there DTF right off the bat and that's great! The problem seems to arise when a hot girl starts "shit testing" me, it throws me for a big fucking loop because I'm not use to dealing with that.

For example I was recently at a club in Vancouver and this brunette chick with this seductive face, green eyes, fit stomach and the juiciest ass in this mini skirt that I'm still not over kept staring at me and smiling. My friend kept saying "she's into you bro" which was starting to fuck with me but anyways she ended up coming over and we started a little small talk about the music or whatever. After a few minutes I start reading her body language and she obviously wants me to do something so I start moving casually to the music to get her comfortable but it was a little weird because my friend and her friend were right there and were not dancing at all. I end up trying to dance/grind with her and essentially she wasn't into the full on grinding but she stayed very close in terms of proximity and was into talking so I didn't try to force anything or overcommit.

After a minute or two of this I knew that I had to say something in order to make my intentions known and to either get her number or get laid. I was pretty strung out from the night before and tipsy from the night at hand that all I could think of at the time was either A) Buy her a drink or B) Say the first thing that pops into my head. I went w/ option B... And for some godforsaken reason (probably from hitting to many strip clubs) I ask her if she "popped molly". In my head I thought that would go a little smoother than it did lol basically she just says "Uhhh No" and I was a little shell shocked that I even said that and even more shocked she said no. From there it wasn't actually all bad I just said "oh yeah neither... I was just kidding with you"

To make a long story short we chill for a bit longer then end up naturally parting, I think they went to look for her other friend or some bullshit and we went to go scan for other potential girls. After the club closed and right before she was about to get into a cab she sees me and gets me to put my number in her phone and calls my phone and tells me to text her... My phone was dead so I never got the number -_-

My Questions:

1) What are some fun and natural conversation topics to maintain attraction after that initial meet/greet?

2) What is all this kino stuff about? From the light browsing I've done it has intrigued me.

3) Sometimes I overthink things when I'm talking to the hottest girls in the club because I know every other guy is watching me and hoping I fuck up. What's your mindset to get past these irrational thoughts?


I know, I know tl;dr but I'd really appreciate any Advice!

Pat

Hey SPAM,
it seems like you have a very high level of calibration with is superb!
many guys who enter this field, lack even the slightest calibration and when learn that they should "persist", just keep persisting much after they lost the girl.
plus they cant seem to understand the need to move back a little bit. you do!

yeah, makes sense that with some girls, whom you feel more entitled to or the type of girls you have been with in the past, you will feel more relaxed. and with girls you feel less used to, like what you call "9" you may feel less relaxed.

well my friend,
in the interaction you just wrote about, the girl was with you and all you needed was to take matters to your own hands! yep, its weird when people are hovering next to you 2, so next time just take her hand and move her away. just tell her you want to show her the club or something.
the ability to move the interaction forward, to decide for the 2 of you(girls will rarely decide and act for you-her asking for your number is a rarity...) and to be assertive and go for what you want-is the most important thing.

regarding your questions:
1)the attraction is there, else she wouldn't be with you. the most attractive thing is to be relaxed as possible, just talk with her about what you talk with your friends about.

2)well, "kino" is physical touch. we go back to moving the interaction forward...the physicality is what makes you different than most guys. she understands she is talking with a man who is afraid of showing her he is attracted to her. hugs, proximity(stand very close to her) and holding her hand may be some examples.

3)that's ok man-just spend more time next to beautiful girls and make sure they understand why you are there(verbally-tell them) and you will feel more comfortable in no time. just remember-they are like you, they have their fears and low self-confidence. and...they poop also!

good luck man.

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