saying what you think/putting a girl in her place



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PostPosted: Fri Jan 02, 2015 5:06 am 
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Joined: Tue Dec 23, 2014 12:34 am
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i work at a grocery store in a shopping center, i noticed this girl that would come in from time to time that worked at another retail store in the same shopping center. one day i need to go to her store to get something and she's working the register. anyway i get her number and we go out about a week later.

the date goes awesome. she likes drinking and so do i, we go to like 3 different bars including game works (she tells me she love gameworks and genuinely seems to enjoy her self there), lots of kino going on and we kiss close the date, could have gone further but decided not to rush things.

then later she's texting me like crazy, and ask when i work so that she maybe able to come see me when her shift ends. i work over night and her in the evening so one day she comes and see me at the end of her shift, this is when everything changes.

since i'm a manager, not the manager mind you, i'm giving the night crew orders on what needs to be accomplished etc... she see's me doing this and waits off to the side. i'm a very chill person, i don't yell at my employees, belittle them or chastise them, everyone says i'm the coolest to work with.

then we arrange another date, the date was very average, borderline bad. she seems distant and not the girl i took out the first time, then she ask me about being a manager, whats it like, how much i get paid etc... then ask about my education (i have a B.S. in business marketing and one in business management) this seems to amaze her, she says she never actually graduated high school, she got her GED and tells me about how all the other guys she dated were loosers, most never even graduated highschool or got a GED, were drug addicts, already had x amount of kids etc... losers like she said. then she goes on to disqualify herself. about how she works some entry level job with minimum wage pay, still lives at home, how her other sibling is much more successful than her etc... ya i know the red flags were all out.

at the end of date when i go to drop her off she looks very confused and almost disillusioned and says "well this was fun, maybe we can do it again" the whole time she is very awkward with her words, pauses a lot and keeps looking back and fourth. then she says "well your a sweet guy, you deserve better"

then that's when i kinda of put it all together and say "oh this isn't about me being a sweet guy, its about me not being like every other guy you dated and that scares you, you never been in this position and don't know what to do" the most awkward thing happens next because for about 2 minutes she just stays at her gate into her apartment complex looking like she cant decided between going in or going to me, not saying a word.

i'm just caught up in the whole awkward moment and tell her goodbye and leave.

so fellas should have told her something different? was i right tell her what i think about the situation? how would have you handle it?

btw she was a HB8 but i don't care if i ever see her or hear from here again, no love lost :D


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 02, 2015 5:34 am 
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Joined: Sat Jun 20, 2009 1:32 am
Posts: 3904
Should've taken her hand and led her to yours. This sounds like one of those times where she wanted you to take charge.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 02, 2015 6:42 am 
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Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 8:14 am
Posts: 134
Location: Bay Area, California
Not sure what you mean by "red flags." It seems to me that she was insecure, especially in reference to your position and education. Seems like she's attracted to you and doesn't think she's good enough for you. Got to read that and run "grounding" routines to signal that you're a "normal" person just like her, not someone out of her league. Also, maybe it would help to convey more M2F attraction and let her know she's cute/cool/funny/interesting/etc, that you enjoy hanging out with her and don't just want her for sex.
Quote:
Should've taken her hand and led her to yours. This sounds like one of those times where she wanted you to take charge.
Agreed on that, as well.

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:46 pm 
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The Coach
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Joined: Sun Jun 19, 2011 7:44 am
Posts: 4170
Location: Chicago, IL
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"well your a sweet guy, you deserve better"

Ouch lol

You need to make things more sexual. You're so caught up in DHVing and building attraction... you forgot to actually fuck the girl.

She was probably waiting for you to come inside with her. But you didn't.

Man... You're such a nice guy.

Look up the word "ruthless" and train yourself to be just that... ruthless ;)


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