So basically i have never had an issue with girls as i have always been able to gain interest from a girl who i wanted.
Im out of a 2 year rship and now i decided that i might start dating again. This one is really strange don't judge!
Ive focused on my career and not bothered with girls but my mother has been doing my head in and she met this girl who she wanted me to message but i refused as its lame!. so my mother bless her got this girl to message me.... so she did,we hit it off instantly! we talked for 2 weeks and i could tell she was interested she would call me to speak to me constantly laughing ect i would neg her in the right moments and she would message me all day... i could tell the interest was there. it had to be we would speak till early hours of the morning!!!!

So we decided we would go out on the tuesday! i picked her up and took her out, we had fun she was laughing most of the time spent over 5 hours on this first date. I know I'm not bad looking as i get enough interest from girls that don't have any material to them but i can't deal with boring girls!!. Nevertheless i dropped her home (parents were at home) and shortly after i got home she called me (she was driving her car somewhere) saying she has a lot of drama going on and if she calls me not to answer!

So i thought must be something to do with her ex boyfriend as her family was at home... anyway she messages me at 4am that same night saying she has had the worst night and only got home and she wouldn't tell me what this drama was.

I asked her the next day how her boy troubles were? to try and provoke her to tell me what this drama was. she said not boy troubles just troubles... we spoke all day some, gaps in talk but normal jokes. then the following day i messaged her and she replied but i replied to her at 11am and she didn't reply to my message.

my friends advice was to message her the next day and say " hey hope everything is ok"

she waited 12 hours and messaged me back saying.

"hey I'm sorry I've been dead I've had a really bad few days n i don't wanna be taking stuff out on people when they've not done anything n i know the timing is awk cuts it was the right after i saw you which doesn't help but I'm just trying get stuff sorted right now"

So i replied saying i understand blah blah if u need to talk to someone I'm here and i know you'll be ok cuts ur a strong girl. but if I'm someone you don't want to talk to then let me know so i know where i stand.

i haven't had a reply to this yet and its been 2 days. quite confused here because I'm starting to doubt myself. is this something to do with me? maybe she didn't have fun. but when you know know she is interested then this happens I'm just confused. I obviously can not message her now because that will make me look desperate what do you guys suggest i do?


A lot to read i appreciate it guys!

N

I think you need to learn the difference between a girl beinginterested in you as a buddy, and being interested in you as a lover.

You speak of laughs and jokes and fun, and say not one word about anything sexual. If the date is fun, and no sexual tension, you're friends, not lovers. Make sense?

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RSDTyler

You are being too available on the phone to text. The phone is meant to set dates, not be her male girlfriend and listen to all of her shit. Be shorter with her on texting, send one or two messages back and fourth, and see when she is free to get together.

Dude, personally im a nice guy. If she has shit going on and needs someone to be there for her then do it. Be a gentleman and a nice guy if you get friendzoned fuck it at least you helped her out. Sounds like shes having a rough time. Dont get hung up on it and by god dont get attached to her as she istnt investing in you alot,

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You can fail all your life but still achieve more than those who did not try.

Thanks guys, I know she was interested. maybe i didnt explain i made sure i escalated, my main priority was to make her feel comfortable with me which i succesfully did.

I know she is having a rough time, but do i message her even though she has not replied to my last message?

I wont get attached i know there is plenty more fish in the sea.

i wouldnt mind being friendzoned my issue is the way i am has always worked and i the response i got from her to me convinced me that she was interested but now its gone cold!

I dont want to seem pushy.. how long do i wait before i just forget about her?

Thanks guys for your help i appreciate the advice!

I would sarge other woman and hit her up in a couple of weeks and ask how shes doing if she has got everything sorted or what not.

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You can fail all your life but still achieve more than those who did not try.

It's not a big deal. Message her when you feel like it. Your biggest issue here, is over thinking and trying not to mess up.
Provided you're not messaging her multiple times per day, and asking her what's wrong, etc, etc, you're fine. Freezing her out is not effective. Just send her a text soon and see what happens. Nothing in the text or the existence of the text is going to matter. All it does is convey you're still interested.

When a girl goes cold on me, I'll usually send her a simple "what's up" type text, every few weeks for a couple of months. It costs me nothing, and sometimes she comes around. However, I think of her as a dead end, and just looking for a bonus.

You need to have your focus on finding new women, not this one.

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RSDTyler