Ok guys so this is definitely one aspect of game that I find very confusing.

The game places great emphasis on making the girl wait, ending conversations first, not coming across as needy etc.

But, at the same time there is a very thin line between coming across as needy and coming across as uninterested.

My question basically centers around this topic. How do you guys know when to hold back and make the girl miss you and when do you know that this is when you should show interest by initiating a conversation?

And since we are on the topic of making her wait, how long should one wait for the girl to initiate contact? I've seen guys on the forums who wait up to 1 week after last contact and it seems to work for them but it doesn't make it any less confusing,

Idk who'd be kind enough to shed some light on this issue.

Here's my personal rules in regard to communication and time type shit.

Girl calls me to bullshit or wants to meet up but I'm busy... Talk with her for like 10 minutes. Then I've gotta go. I don't have time to pussy foot around like that. If we're meeting up... I'll figure out whether or not its gonna happen within the first few minutes of talking then cut it off.

Only talk when you're free, logistics are good, and can actually meet up with the girl. I've had some girls who I've stayed on the phone with them until they got to my house. Told them every single step of the way. "Okay now put your shoes on. Good. Now go out to your car and start driving." And keep bullshitting with them until the second they pull into my driveway and I answer the door. Otherwise, keep the conversations short. You don't want to give off the image of a guy who's got nothing better to do with his life than sit around on the phone with some girl all day.

Same rules apply for texting but even less communication. Alot of guys get a girls number then "game the shit out of her" forgetting that they even wanted to have sex with the girl. Texting is really for logistics purposes only. Little to no fluff talk. No "get to know you" conversations over text.

As far as time in between responses goes... respond when you can. But be busy. Dude, I honestly get text messages from people and if they aren't paying me or blowing me, they aren't really a priority to respond to. Sometimes it takes me a day or two... sometimes longer to get back to them. I've got alot of shit going on and really just don't have time to chase after people.

That, my friend, is how you think from a true state of "abundance." Just be so content and busy with life that you don't NEED anything else... and all the sudden, everyone will want to be a part of what you've got going on.

To be honest dude;

I don't consciously follow ANY of those rules.. Those are things that just usually NATURALLY happen with men who easily attract women. If you're trying to fake it or do it because its what you THINK works; a chick will sniff you out as being unauthentic, immature, dishonest etc.

What guys have to understand is that as long as you know who you are as a MAN the woman in your life will naturally submit to who you are.

Its never about what you do, what you say, or what you think; Its all about the place within you SOUL that your actions and words are coming from.

If I call a girl 10 times in a row, but in her heart and soul her intuition knows for a fact that I'm not needy she will not perceive my actions as being needy. Now on the flip side, if I call her a twice in a row and her intuition alarms her that i am needy I will be seen as needy.

Getting good with women isn't about faking some act or playing some game to attract them, getting good with women is all about cultivating a space WITHIN yourself that women find attractive. That way it doesn't really matter what you do on the outside(or what you look like) the women will be attracted to the light that shines from within you.

Women don't objectivity men the way that we objectify women. They're more interested in how we feel about our own selves than they are about how they feel about it. If you believe you are attractive, the women in your life will see that and believe it as well. If you think you're ugly the women in your life will sniff that out and believe that you are ugly as well. This is why the concept of INNERGAME is the only thing about the PUA community that I feel is actually important.

Fix the inside and the outside will take care of itself.

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It's the idea of what came first... the chicken or the egg?

I'm a big fan of all the "inner game" stuff too... But some people need some practical advice to be able to relate back to. You can't just tell everyone to think a certain way... Some guys need more than a pep talk. They need to be told what to do and what that way of thinking looks like in reality.

Jason Capital has one of the best step by step strategies for this in his book “Make Women Want You.”

You need to make sure you first initiate contact 10-30 minutes after you’ve finished your conversation with her. This will help get rid of the “cool down” period.

The rule of thumb is to wait 24 hours after that contact if it was a warm approach. (a friend of a friend, etc...)

If it was a cold approach, the rule of thumb is to wait about 36 hours to text/call her.

The difference between the two isn’t very big, but there is one very important part to these rules


Your next contact with her after waiting 24-36 hours should between about 12pm-3pm.

The reason for this is because if you text a girl earlier than 12, odds are she was one of the first things that popped into your mind when you woke up. A girl won’t consciously be aware of this, but she will get this feeling of neediness from you.

Alternatively, if you text her after 3, odds are you are either looking for a booty call that night or you don’t have any plans and are trying to quickly make some. This just flat out makes you come across as low status.

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I like to lay the foundation before I put up the building. Sure practical advice has it's place, but I find it to be ineffective in the end when the guys don't have their insides sorted out.

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Thanks guys, you have no idea how much this has helped. I agree with almost everything that has been said and even more so I will use your words as motivation to bring about radical change.

Just to round it off I have one more question though, and it is definitely very much relevant to to the point under discussion. The question is: how much talk is too much talk during the various stages of interacting with a beautiful woman?

I find myself acting like an absolute AFC in the initial stages of an interaction with a girl and I just literally talk too much (I think so). It has worked for me in the past sometimes and I guess that's why I keep persisting with this stupid behavior.

Now I think about it there are several drawbacks of this, firstly she gets used to something in the beginning that is just humanely impossible for a man to sustain, no one can keep up with that much talk lol.

Secondly, it's a big show of Low value because you're literally taking out loads of time to talk to a girl.

I guess I answered my own question there but would love to hear more if you guys have Anything to add.