Hey dudes. So I'be been using online with some success on and off for about 6mos. Emailed tons, got some numbers and met several. Generally if I can get them out on a date, I'm good. Now I'm at the point where I'm trying to get more proficent at it. I'don't say about 95% of my messages get read and at least 90% of those ladies will check out my profile, then that's where things fall off. My response rate is pretty low.....probably about 5-8%.

My openers are generally funny and somewhat teasing the girl. No compliments and no borderline insults. I message girls anywhere from 25-35 yrs old (34 myself)

So I'm assuming it's either my profile description or the pics themselves that lose these girls. Im hesitant to post a link directly to my profiles for fear of getting Googled but I will definitely give it in PM to anyone that wants to help. At the very least here is a cut and paste of the body of my profile. Keep in mind I'm 34, do I feel like going totally off the deep end with tons of purposely funny things doesn't really feel consistent with my age and maturit level. Amy thoughts on that?

Here you are, be nice, be fair and be constructive.

Match

I read somewhere that including a photo of your pet in a dating profile decreases your responses by 30%, which I think is completely ridiculous. If you can say no to 30lbs of furry cuteness, you’re probably a terrible person and we shouldn’t talk anyway. I’m kidding…. mostly.

Like most of us, my weeks are super busy. So by the time Friday rolls around, sometimes it's nice to sit on the couch with my chubby four legged friend and just eat a pizza....literally, an entire pizza. Yeah I know you hate me and my ridiculous metabolism.

Whether its flying down a hill with trees whizzing past and bugs in my teeth, or silently gliding through the water under a canopy of cypress trees in a kayak, I love to get out and experience everything this great state has to offer. Originally being from Michigan, having the ability to get outside and do things a majority of the year is simply something that can’t be taken for granted

In closing, I don't have a particular "type" per se. However, if you're an overall positive, optimistic person who is open minded and in search of someone with tons of personality, we should definitely talk.

And I cook.....boom.

-Till then




THANKS IN ADVANCE GUYS

You seem like a guy who is laid back, lacks confidence, has a weak social circle, a poor diet, lacks drive, and doesn't know what he wants in a woman. You're funny.

That's pretty much what you're saying with...what you're saying.

I'm not gonna lie. The words in my profile suck massive whale penis. So I took most of them out and let the pictures do the talking.

No selfies. All solo pictures are taken by someone else.

Pictures of activities will get the attention in your direction. Girls will approach you online if you have a picture with you and a cute animal, you at a specific concert of some sort, you doing yoga, you cycling or running a 5k. For me, I get a lot of girls commenting on pictures of me gardening.

That's right folks, the secret is out. If you want pussy online, go garden.

But really, if you are lacking social life, and life activity, online game is not going to be your magic pill. There is no magic pill. You have to put in the work. The confidence you lack in real life is going to have light shed upon it online. It'll actually get worse over time. Here's why.

And I am writing this shit like everyone is reading because you all should be thinking about this shit in your theory-wrapped minds.

I say this shit all the time but here's another way of putting it. Girls have online profiles. They get massive online attention. One girl I met online said she had 300 likes in the first week on OkCupid. I have like...300 likes on my OkCupid Career. I consider my profile somewhat successful, but sure I could be doing better. The point is this. You have a massive chop off the top when it comes to online dating. Hot girl is like..."Ok haha i'll give this a try." BOOM! Every guy in the state is clicking to fuck her. Creepy right? Now you have an even lower percentage of attractive looking women to operate with.

The ones that stick around are getting hit on by way more men. Their standard goes way up, your competition goes way up. It is infinitely easier to hit up a girl online than it is in person, for most. It shouldn't be but it is way more likely to happen, considering men can message a girl but simply will not force themselves to cold approach. Your in person experience is more effective, win or lose. You are going to win or lose harder in person. In person, she's already there to have the move made on her. You know what she looks like. She knows what you look like. Online...nothing can really happen until you meet in person anyway. It's like adding obstacles before you start. In person, you don't have to worry about response frequency. You can just let her do the talking, you can even escalate kino while talking.

It's just easier in person to show your personality if that is your selling feature. There is way less competition because anything you're doing trumps whatever the other guy is doing online.

_________________
Attraction is a choice.
ITS YOUR CHOICE!
Spread Love
-Ders


www.facebook.com/spreadloveders

I appreciate your response, however if you can't give me anything specific youre not really helping and pretty much just telling me, and whoever reads this, how awesome YOU are.

The point for me posting is that I don't feel like I'm conveying my personality at all. The only two points your are correct on is me being pretty laid back, and my social circle is definitely small. Just moved to a new city for a giant raise.

Any specific advice you can give us definitely appreciated, but if you can't tell me "x makes you sound like y", or change this wording, shorten that....than all your doing is spouting theory to make yourself sound smart and not really helping

Are you going for a relationship with this or are you going for having a social life that includes an option of a few girls that you spend time with and have fun with?

Because it reads to me like your a guy in your 50's in a viagra commercial that wants a wife. You're talking way too much about your dog. Don't talk about the dog, it sounds like you have issues. Instead, include an adorable picture of you and your dog. Drop the pizza line. I think you went for mature and over shot it. Even mature girls like some fun.

When you say you don't have a type, your saying that you aren't picky and don't have options. Instead of saying "I don't have a type" you should instead be describing girls you want to meet in a way that is vague as shit but sounds deep.

"I'm looking for a mature but fun-loving girl who isn't in to drama but can keep me on my toes. etc. etc..."

This way it looks like you have high standards but if you ask every girl on earth "are you mature but love to have fun and hate drama" they will all say yes, especially the girls who don't even fit in these categories.

That's just my quick look over it. I'm sure you'll get some more advice.

And at the end of the day, your pics are going to be ten times more important than your bio, so get them up to snuff.

Sorry mate. I hit submit early after I was distracted for a bit. I get a bit ranty at times. Here is some randomly disorganized online dating advice. An online profile such as this, should help you take a look at yourself and whatever else is out there and get a different perspective of where you are. Include pictures of you partaking in activities. List some things you actually expect from a person, that may disqualify some. "On a typical Friday night, you are..." If you don't have anything that adds value here, leave it empty. You don't have to fill out every bit of your profile.

I feel like you are right about the humor and maturity being a factor. There should be a sense of seriousness that is still exciting. I think simply stating you enjoy hikes and kayaking might be better than your romantic descriptions of your adventures.

For your Friday, if you are typically more social on another day, segway your reference to that day instead.

I talked about my profile to give an example of how something increases success. More activity and being busy working on yourself does a lot. Staying alone on a Friday night with your dog eating pizza is only going to attract a certain audience. Think of it like that.

I like hippie girls who value certain things, so I emphasize the hippie hang outs i go to, my personal spirituality, and my garden....which is hilarious. But if you enjoy kayaking and hiking, post some pictures of you hiking. If you want the girl who stays home and eats pizza...you're already attracting her. And I am assuming you don't want that.

I feel like your profile sticks out but it's just lacking the attraction. People can see your funny nature through funny pictures doing attractive things.


Also, Other dating sights such as Tinder, and OkCupid are less profile oriented, and there is less pressure when it comes to a meet up.

Bah this is a mess but I hope it helps more than my last post.

_________________
Attraction is a choice.
ITS YOUR CHOICE!
Spread Love
-Ders


www.facebook.com/spreadloveders

Ok, there we go. Thanks guys. This is the feedback I needed. I didn't realize how other people were interpreting some of the things I was saying.

I have far from a boring "sit my ass on the couch" kind of life, but didn't realize that some of the shit I wrote says that unless you actually think about it. Which, let's be honest, chicks don't think about these profiles, they skim them and take what's on the surface.

So much advice on online profiles, some that I read said to be more descriptive with language to paint a mental picture, so tried it...aaannnndd moving on. I was questioning it myself, figured id give it a shot but I can def see how that makes it stand out in a not good way.

Guess I'm gonna be that dude that asks random strangers to take my photo when I'm out biking, kayaking or whatever. No harm in that either.

Any other words of wisdom ppl have feel free...thanks to those that have given already.

Draft 2.

I gave it another go with the feedback so far, though I do have some concerns.

Did I go from one extreme to the other? Does it seem like I'm trying too hard now? Any jokes I should take out?




I’ve been known to completely pick up and move on a whim. I'm a grammar nazi, which means something I've written will inevitably be missing some crucial punctuation. I can’t remember the last time I slept past 9am.

I love to kayak, mountain bike or do anything that allows me to get out experience everything this great state has to offer. Originally being from Michigan; having the ability to get outside and do things most of the year is just something that can’t be taken for granted.

Trivia:
-Staying fit and eating healthy is an important part of my life, taking care of yourself should be a part of yours
-Movie quotes and song lyrics are perfectly acceptable forms of communication
-Negativity and pessimism have no place in my life; I will always find a bright side. Cut off a finger? I say faster manicure. Your house burned down? New everything!!
-I’m professional, articulate, and have a wicked and inappropriate sense of humor. Better yet, I know when not to use it.
-Singing a terrible, karaoke version of “Total Eclipse of the Heart” is on my bucket list

I’m looking for a mature but fun-loving girl who is strong minded, has an good sense of humor and can keep me on my toes. One who’s adventurous, has just a touch of crazy and will act like a total kid with me.
-Talk Soon

Lol very true. A bit off topic, but THOSE SAME GUYS would NEVER approach IRL. RL is easy pickings gents.
I thought you said you sit and eat entire pizzas. Be yourself and own who you are, whatever that is. Women smell bullshit a mile away.

One doesn't negate the other.

In the first version with the pizza line, I'm counting on chicks reading elsewhere in my profile that I workout 5 days a week. Also...the "ridiculous metabolism" part directly after implies I can cheat my smashing an entire pizza without a problem...which agaib, is the truth.

I decided to heed the suggestions I've gotten and remove that line entirely and also mention more obviously I'm a fit, healthy dude.
I thought you said you sit and eat entire pizzas. Be yourself and own who you are, whatever that is. Women smell bullshit a mile away.[/quote]