Long story short, had sex with a pretty cute girl at my cousin's birthday party just under a month ago. Got her number afterwards, texted her we should meet up eventually.

Ended up seeing each other couple weeks after at a bar with my cousin and some mutual friends. Ended up making out at the end of the night but she had to go cause she had work early.

Spoke to my cousin after, he told me his girlfriend (who is friend with this chick) isnt sure about a relationship with me but is down to have a sexual relationship. No problems with me...

About a week later, after some heavy projects at work, i decided i need to go downtown and get some drinks in me to relax. I called said girl and she met me. We ate, drank and ended the night at a little bar. I was touching up on her, we were making out and then, she invited me back to her place.

I said I couldn't. I had a huge seminar to run early the next day at work, it was already midnight and I was miles from home. She said "really, youre turning me down"? and i said yea but ill make it up to u next time

Flash forward, we're hailing a cab kiss good night. she texts me a selfie when she gets home saying she has to cuddle alone now and I missed out. I told her to come by my area soon and she said "When I'm invited".

Texted her couple days later told her to come by my area. She said she was booked up all week but suggested the weekend. I told her sounds good and to hit me up if she frees up to which she hasnt replied.

My cousin calls and tells me "im messing up" with her and starts giving me a hard time that I didnt go home with her.

Few more things about this chick...

- She never initiates any texts ever
- She hasn't added me on Facebook (weird for most chicks at this point)
- Shes hot and cold in person

Anyway , was not going home with her such a big deal? it was like my 3rd time seeing her ever and we've already slept together

how should I proceed? should i hit her up this coming weekend as she suggested? she literally never messages or calls first though....seems kind of weird?

im all over the place...not getting any clear signals from her and what she wants.....warm when we meet but absent/uncommunicative when we're not

any input is appreciated

She wants your dick. Clear enough?

When you invited her out, she was expecting a night of drinking and then going back to your place to have a good fuck. Which you withheld from her. You let her down. A guy gets upset when a girl says no to sex right? Imagine a guy that has NEVER been told no his entire life being told no. He's going to pretty pissy and in a bad mood right? Well that's what your dealing with. A girl who's probably never been told no (If she's at least mildly attractive) in her entire life and you invited her out, the entire time thinking she was going home for a shag afterwards, and then you told her no. If you are inviting a girl that obviously wants the dick out for drinks, you should do it early enough to where you have time afterwards for sex. And if you don't have time for sex afterwards, you shouldn't have invited her.

Keep that in mind with her. She doesn't want to go out and hang out and be friends. She wants a fun night out followed by sex. So give her what she wants.

Don't act sorry that you had to turn her down. Don't act like you have to make it up to her. Get her out again or get her by your place and bang her brains in.

makes sense. Im not gonna take her anywhere or do anything from now on unless sex is the end result

Ive had sex many times in my life. Ive already boned this girl. Going back to her place and dying at work isnt worth a lay to me.....I literally just wanted to chill and get to know her, drink some stress away and go home....never in my life did I think that could work against me, especially since I kept it physical at the bar but i guess you learn something new every day

Thanks for your input though, you are definitely right

You did good keeping it physical, but again you have to think about it from her view. You went out, got her nice and horny, and then told her no that you're too busy for sex. Hind sight is 20/20, and trust me, it's hard to see this kinda shit coming, but you always have to be looking at the logistics.

In many scenarios you would have been perfectly fine. And at the end of the day you shouldn't be ruined. You turning her down might make her chase a bit more. You just have to keep her on the line.

Just from now on always plan ahead. If you only have an hour to meet up, tell the girl, "Hey, i have a quick hour, grab some coffee with me then I have to go do something". As long as she knows before hand there shouldn't be an issue with a sane girl. If she's a drama freak then there's no telling regardless.

In this case you should have told her that you'd have to cut the night early before meeting up. Maybe even ask her if she'd rather watch a movie at her place tonight since you have to leave kinda early then go out on a night where you can stay out late and still bang afterwards.

Really appreciate your words. This is basically what I worked out in my head.

I texted her and told her she needs to come to my area sometime this week. She said she was working all week with school and was booked mon - fri and asked what my deal for the weekend was. I told her id probably be around and to call me if she frees up and come over.

What should I do now? Let it cool till the weekend? I was thinking of hitting up a mutual friend we have for drinks then telling her we're together and meeting up that way.....or should i be more direct and just ask her what shes doing Saturday on Thursday night?

I think both could work, personally I'd be more direct. If she has a bar she loves to go to tell her that you want to go out on such n such night, meet me there. If she doesn't, tell her that such n such bar is having awesome drink specials this night, lets hang out. If she keeps saying no then freeze her out til the weekend after and then see whats up.

You did nothing wrong. Nothing like showing you can take or leave it with a girl to get her wondering. Also the part of her not initiating texting is not odd in some cases. Yeah hit her up for the weekend.

What signals do you need bro?

Text her whenever you wana get it in.

You sound like a desperate housewife.

Seeing as to how worried you seem about this one girl im guessin theres no more girls in your life?

Make plans, if she accepts good.

Who cares if she texts you first or not, your not brad pitt.

Get sum pussy

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