Tonight is the big night, I think I'm stressing out because I know I have to make a move on the date at somepoint. If I just go out and have a good time I know I will not make a move and she will think I want to be friends with her. I'm rubbish at Kino. i'll try my best though. Wish me luck!

thanks for all the advice.

well it was a fun night, but she messaged me at the end of the night saying she enjoyed herself and thought we could be good friends.

story of my life I'm the most friend zoned guy in the world. do you think I should message her back or move on? I tried to kino by touching her leg but she didn't seem responsive. I moved my chair closer in and she moved away when my leg was near hers. should I have tried a bit harder? I threw in a few compliments and she seemed to smile.

I really need help with the first date. I still think I'm just putting out a friends vibe.

can people tell me exactly what they do on a drinks date play by play? I really need it explained.

It probably would be better for you to explain play by play of what you did. It would be easier to correct what you've done incorrectly rather than trying to adopt someone else's approach. One of the things I did notice that you've said is that you did kino by touching her leg and if that's where you started, you didn't do it correctly.

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Where are you meeting these women? (Online, daygame, night game)
If online, are you using current pictures?

I'm guessing you're using online stuff. Get out and learn how to flirt with women in person, ie club/bar game.

I agree. Or hit the streets during the day. You need to gain more experience when it comes to interacting with women as a whole, in a playful flirtatious manner.

I met this girl online. I did use a relatively new picture from the last year. I would be terrible at the day game lol.

Play for play. We met in bar for drinks it was kind of awkward when we first greeted each other as you do. When you meet someone online for first time so we hugged. We sat on a small table opposite each other. I asked how she was.

Then spoke about a few bad dates I has been online and complimented how nice she looked. This opened the conversation up for her to talk about her bad dates. We both laughed at the stories. After we ordered more drinks, I leaned my chair close to the table where my leg would be touching hers she kind of moved back. So I made reference to a story and gently touched her leg during it to explain something. Not sure how receptive she was.

After we just spoke about food, drink, her job, and travelling. I thought the date went ok but there was no opportunity for a kiss and ahe wasn't giving me the signals for it. Please tell me what im doing wrong??

She ended up texting at the end of the night saying she had a really great night and could be good friends. I might be wasting my time but there's something about this girl I really like. I need to win her over. She is currently away on holiday so I can arrange to see her just yet but can still text.
Thanks.

Sit right next to the girl so that it goes from 0 opportunities to kiss to 10000 opportunities to kiss.

And hit the streets during the day or hit the clubs at night. Online game is no shortcut because as you're finding out you still have to have the chops when you meet up with the girls IRL. A much better selection of girls is available out in the real world too, and, bonus! - she will actually believe you have a pair of balls because you approached her in the real world as opposed to hiding behind a tablet.

Speaking about bad dates is going to put you in a negative light. When she started talking about her bad dates, it can put her in a bad mindset as well with the lingering thought of maybe this will be another bad date.

Like oceanx said, sit right next to her. You can move from harmless kino and then escalate to playful touching to constant touch. You can find just about any reason to start without her putting her guard up. From showing her a picture on your phone to removing some lint on her shoulder. When you're getting to the point of a statement that you are making touch her on her arm while making that point. When you make a flirty type of joke, lean over and touch her shoulder with yours. It's the congruence of the touch relative to what you are doing is what makes it work. This is what she talks about when she goes out to drinks with one of her girlfriends and that's why she's telling you that you guys can be friends. If you want conversation that builds attraction you have to talk to her about things that she can open up and express emotion. Things like her goals in life, her family growing up, anything that is close to her heart. You in turn can join in give her feedback about any similar experiences or goals or even good advice if you have it. That way you can make a bond and move to the affectionate kino.

I'm not great when it comes to fixing lost attraction and I would rather take it as a learning experience and move on. However, if I were to try I would have answered that text with something along the lines of my intent wasn't to be her friend but I have made the mistake of moving too fast with women in the past, so I was trying to be respectful and trying to get to know her as a person blah blah blah.

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Girls are human beings. Not objects to fuck or bang and then play stupid, immature mind games with. You guys have a lot to learn.

LOL! Don't try to patronise me, Captain White Knight.

When you don't text a girl for a while (because you've been busy, nothing to do with mind games you sad, pathetic little betafemale) and then you do text, theyre very happy to hear from you. They LOVE it, they've missed you and had the chance to appreciate you! WHY should I prevent them from getting something that they love? Is that how selfish you are, you'd keep her emotional high from reaching its potential? You keep being available 24/7 and ruining attraction, I'll keep myself too busy to reply to every girl 24/7 - just DON'T judge me for it, get some experience with women, learn how they work, lose your virginity, then you can stop trolling on forums. I tell you what, we'll take an AFC section where guys like you can post Bruno Mars songs and play the violin to themselves about how "She wants a nice guy, so why did she choose that asshole over me? I'd tell he every morning how beautiful she is, she'd never be left wondering when I'll text back, I'd be nice and boring"

I've had hundreds of guys just like you, telling me that I've "got a lot to learn about women" - STOP WATCHING ROMANTIC COMEDIES AND WAKE UP!

Thats really annoyed me. Patronising me because I don't make myself readily available for every girl I date? Grow up and get some experience, kid.

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Your bad at kino, bad at escalation. Funny thing is it doesn't matter so much in this situation. You've got it wrong. It's counter intuitive, but if this is an online date that you met, you need to not hit on her. Because she's expecting it. You should especially not hit on her, if it's going to be very overt and obvious.

Generally, you want to be different from the norm. It's not always the case, but surprisingly, more often than not it's the right thing to do.

I understand that you regularly get friend-zoned. This is a different situation though. She's not friend zoning you for the reasons u think.

You think you got friend zoned because you didn't escalate, you didn't kino. In fact, you got friend zoned because you too overtly tried to escalate things and ultimately she overtly wanted you to know there's nothing between you. That is why she bothered saying that you can be good friends.

You moved your leg closer to hers and she moved away. This is not a sign to further escalate or attempt more romantic kino. Actually, you shouldn't have even gone into this with the mind set of wanting to escalate fast and physically. You see, she's expecting it. It's an online date presumably from some dating web site or app ? The context is a romantic one to begin with.

You need to stand out by NOT making the whole thing weird and trying to go for the leg touch, or the eventual kiss at the door step or whatever cliche thing she's expecting.

Next time, play it cool. Don't clue her into thinking you want anything from her at all. Be yourself, but your best self. Be confident, fun, relaxed, uninhibited and exciting. Simply put, generate some attraction. Naturally, you should also be a touchy person.
But not making it a "goal" like purposely moving closer towards her leg or whatever. You touch her when you make a point. You touch her firmly wen you meet. When you say goodbye. Hold her on the small of her back when first meet and give her a hug.

Most of all, don't make her the prize. You frame yourself as the prize. And don't pressure yourself into getting super physical or anything on the first date. You don't have to.

On a side note, you need to practice and be aware of micro calibrating your behaviour and actions.
If you move closer and she moves away, you need to adjust big time, and fast. Immediately pull back. Do Sth else.

Translation.

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Thanks translation for your reply you make a lot of sense. I spent a lot of time worrying about what she thought about me on the date instead of relaxing and just being myself. I think about things too much. The other problem I have is I can give too much away and it just turns into the girl becoming my best friend and not a girlfriend. I've been on a lot of first dates which have been a lot of fun but Never impressed a girl enough to think about a second date. I'm a bit confused where to go from here on and how to improve my game.

The girl who I went on a date with is on holiday. Don't know if I should text her now or wait a week when she is back.

Doesn't matter. Make a date with her then or later, who gives. Shit. As always it's about how you're asking, and how much attraction and connection you've generated.

Foresst for the trees my friend. If she finds you super attractive and you had a great time doesn't matter when u make that date.

In terms of kiss closing, again thats vague. Depends what yor goals are. You want to have this girl in your life ? Maybe as a sexual partner, or possible romantic partner... Than you don't have to focus on kiss closing. Don't think so short term. In my opinion the best thing to do is always to go out be attractive, generate attraction and connect. You'll always have a ton of girls in ur life and every girl u meet will just add to that. Once she's in ur life, the kiss will happen. No real need to rush it on the first date. She'll also be expecting it. But if the date ones well and u vibe and end up kissing, than great. Go for it.

But don't focus on going for the kiss, focus on making you a more touchy person. Someone who communicates with his sense of touch so you'll always be escalating.

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We have an extensive body of knowledge.

We have the BEST MINDS you will ever find on social-interaction and relationships.

Wish I saw this thread earlier.

I'm actually going to release a free 30-page ebook soon on how to have the perfect first date! It'll probably be ready in a few days. Keep an eye on my forum signature for updates!

One thing that I forgot to put in the report, though, is how you should wear your cologne. I learned the "proper" way to wear cologne a long time ago from my trusted wingman from when I was in New Orleans, Stormy (the dude with the epic inner game thread in the inner game board).

If you wear cologne this way, it brings out all of the "bass notes" and everything. It fully releases all of the awesome potential of a cologne or something like that. I don't know. I can't explain why it's awesome but I just do it and the responses from girls have been great.

1. After you shower, don't dry off your chest. Spray 3 or 4 times on your chest, mixing it with the remaining water on your chest, and air-dry.
2. After you've completely dried off your whole body, spray one time in each inner elbow. Rub your wrists in your inner elbows.
3. Spray once or twice on your neck. Swipe your fingers on your neck and rub behind your ears.

This might seem like way too much cologne at first but for some reason it ends up being exactly the perfect amount.

Need-to-know-for dates but I've also incorporated this into my daily routine.

You post some great stuff.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.