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The aim is to make the date good enough for her to be thinking about it, wanting you to get in touch, and the exact opposite of losing attraction is what has happened in my experience - most girls get impatient and call me, and we arrange a date. How different is that, compared to what most hot girls are used to? Every guy is asking for another date before the first one has even ended, which is communicating that you don't believe you're good enough to see her again. But thats just me.
Let's think about the logic you have here. Everyone has heard of the 3 day rule, so basically that's what most guys do. It's so overused that even women talk about it and expect it. However, if you're asking for a second date (and asking is pretty unconfident way of doing it) without already knowing what her answer would be, that can come off bad. But if you know that she is having a good time and can't get enough of you, you tell her that you want to do it again. Leave no doubt in her mind that a second date is going to happen and you can be man enough to say it's going to happen directly to her face without having to say "please" or "will you go out with me again" and she will leave her schedule open for you. But saying that it's communicating that you have no confidence is silly.
Perhaps it's that a lot of guys don't know how to come across direct without being needy is where they have a need to play a lot of these strategies. My success with women had significantly improved by saying what I wanted and how I want it to happen.
That is better than the typical way that I thought you meant it, but "the 3 day rule" isn't even a thing, lol. Most guys just hold out as long as possible and cave the next night at the latest... which I suppose, if you last 3-4 nights, makes you either look strong... or like you've got more options and you might be more of a challenge than she initially thought. I like to phone on say Monday, ask when shes free, then set a date for 3-5 days into the future if I'm available) ...then I'll call her the next week and do the same. I try not to date on weekends, and I call once a week to set a date, then get off the phone - I've got nothing else to talk about that wouldn't be better in person. Having read what you said above though, I wouldn't say that any of our opinions are wrong, or better. I do it my way, you do it yours... none of us drop the old "Will I see you again?" while waiting for that awkward end-of-date kiss. My way is what I learned from Corey Wayne when I was first getting into this stuff. "setting a date, also known as a romantic, fun-filled opportunity for sex to happen" lol. So I've just kind of always stuck to that. I have ended dates with "I've had a good time, lets do it again" and set another date in the past though... if its a girl that I'm already friends with or something, I'd probably set another date while I'm on the date, because I wouldn't be worrying so much about being mysterious and being a challenge and bla bla (unless I was struggling to get out of friend-zone) but if it was a new girl, I'd do mine and call a few days later. Again though, thats just what has worked for me.