Ok i accept that you don't usually get mind fucked. But this girl is mind fucking you right now, so all you need to do is have an answer for everything and build your self esteem.

Once you truly believe that you're awesome, very attractive and interesting, you will learn to love yourself MORE than the girls you're fucking. This is key. Your needs should always come before the girl's needs.

Mentally picture your perfect girl. Start with looks, then imagine the perfect behaviour of this girl (eg. amazing blow jobs, cooks for you, doesn't flirt with other guys etc). If a girl doesn't meet your requirements, either back off and date her casually (fuck buddy) or let her go and walk away. If you are obsessed with the girl and she is your one-itis, dumping her and walking away is the best option.

well, the thing is, i do find myself attractive and interesting lol. I reject tons of girls approaching me. 3 last weekend. i guess i do feel that i have some personal baggage in the past, so i do get a little more interested when i see other people are flawed and a little less interested when they are from seemingly perfect backgrounds.

But i guess the self esteem comes into play when i do find someone that i really like and meets those criteria you listed, that i have a hard time setting boundaries because i want them to like me and i dont want to create strife to turn them off. Which is why i think this situation got as bad as it got. Especially since i finally ran into someone who seemed to enjoy running over me when she saw weakness lol. And i think thats why im so hung up on her, she ran over me and it crushed myself esteem letting myself being treated that way.

So i almost want to fix it or in absence of that, Ive kinda like hearing people call her batshit. as its almost an excuse for my actions