So if your at a social event and your interested in a girl and she's the center of attention what's the most effective way to kill the suitors? Be alpha, befriend them, or just all together dismiss them? I was at a birthday party of a girl I'm interested in and one of my more gossip saavy woman friends educated me to the fact that a certain man at the party was in favor of the birthday girl. "They've been talking" she tells me. Well in light of that I go over to him and introduce myself. I was drunk so the conversation turned into me clowning him about his hipster idealogies. Nothing too disrespectful, but I didn't take it in the direction I wanted. My original intent was to be chummy with him and have my presence next to his be a natural selector in my favor. I was just wondering what everyone on the forums thoughts were to this type of obstacle. BTW my choices didn't at all hinder or help my plans to get the girl, it was just something that , in hindsight, could've been handled better.

Focus on the girl, not the other dudes.

Why haven't you approached the girl and physically escalated?

All of that was going on and everything went well. I'm just curious what others thought on the subject.

I answered your question. You have appproach anxiety. You are mentally giving yourself excuses to not approach. Some guy who you heard that maybe she likes?? Why bother even talking to him??

Why didn't you approach the girl and physically escalate?

This isn't about any sticking point I have. I know this girl and have gone out with her several times. This was my first time being around her friends and that's where my question lies. theres no approach anxiety in question. Her and i were all over eachother. But being at a gathering i interacted with everyone. So the specific question is whether to discredit or to befriend the other possible choices for the target. Does that make more sense?

Define "all over each other". Do you mean kissing and grinding on the dance floor. Have you fucked her yet? You need to be more specific.

At this stage, it doesn't matter if she likes the other guy or not because she is not your girlfriend. She can like (and fuck) whoever she wants and so can you. You need to focus on getting your penis into her vagina ASAP, then she will quickly forget about the other guy.

Tooling rival guys always fails badly, because it shows you are intimidated by them. You are over analysing this too much. Until the girl actually tells you "I'm not into you, I like the other guy" then just ignore the guy and continue to escalate until she either fucks you or says "no".

There was no grinding or making out but it was as intimate as a birthday party with family present can be. Kissing on the cheak, holding her around the waist, whispering to each other. All that I'm not concerned with though and I think you misted my post several times now. I'm a very analytical guy. Its what I'm all about. Studying human nature and finding the splendor in putting the pieces together is my passion. This question was in accord with that passion. Im curious what others, curious about human nature, think about the given situation. This isn't a help me get fucked post.

Dude, you're on a pickup forum. Pickup is about....?? yep, you guessed it: Getting laid. Kissing girls on the cheek is cute, but it's kindergarten stuff which won't get you laid.

You do want to fuck this girl, you're lying to yourself and pretending that you don't. You're only problem is you're too scared to pull the trigger.

There is no way to "kill the suitors". You will ALWAYS come out looking weak, beta and in a much worse position than you were before. I can tell you from my own experience, I used to be like you when I started. Then I blew my chances with girl after girl, because I was so worried about other guys that I didn't focus on myself and getting the girl.

Go and make your own mistakes and learn from them. You continue to ignore good advice, hoping that some other guy on here will give you the magic answer you're looking for. There isn't one.

If you don't want to get laid, you shouldn't be here.

Truer words were never spoken.

Who cares about some tool "suitor". The proper response is to not even care about that. Why even engage him in conversation. As far as you're concerned he doesn't exist. Lay the pipe the way she wants it or someone else will, that is the only guarantee.

Man, your seriously not understanding what I'm trying to say. You've made outlandish assumptions that don't pertain to this post. But you've answered my question several times. You think its best to not pay attention to it. That's cool. That's the response that I was trying to get to. Do people on this forum think its best to, when trying to use social dynamics for pickup, think its best to ignore, dismiss, or befriend a dude that is a friend of the target? Was the question. And I really don't understand how I should go about posting something that doesn't elicit an egotistical response. I come on here to be able to conversate with people and hopefully gain some wisdom. What's your purpose in replying to a post asking for justification of events and throwing out discrediting assumptions? Correct me if I broke some sort of etiquite. Seriously because I like this forum but I can't take a step without being scrutinized rather tha get advice. Seriously educate me if I'm missing something.

I think I understand what you are trying to ask...


This is what i would do: Approach the woman like normal, if a guy makes conversation with you--- entertain the guy but don't INDULGE in the conversation with the guy.

If you are getting beef from a guy because he feels like you are intruding onto his "property", don't try to justify what you are doing to him, and don't come across as a dick.

Instead, Be the charismatic guy you were in the first place, play off his attitude towards you by being humourous, and if he is physically threatening you, look him in the eye and don't respond to his physical gestures unless he actually makes a swing at you.

This will show that you are the most confidant and make the other guy look like he is trying to prove a point to you; lowering his social value.

I hope that helps, but you will not be quite sure unless you apply the information.

_________________
PUA Maxim: Leave the woman better than you found her.