First gf since pua. getting doubts



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PostPosted: Sat Jun 28, 2014 9:16 pm 
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Joined: Wed Dec 28, 2011 12:24 pm
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hey guys

so first of all let me say i been doing pua for about 2 years with my wings. it has changed me a lot and really sorted me out. Before pua i never had a gf or sex or anything inbetween.

But last december i met a girl who i finally f closed.I made her a gf after a month. now im 8 months in a its just struck me that she is not at all a looker. Im talking a tyre on the belly enough to fit on a lorry. However she has an amazing personality and somehow isnt actually as crazy as women tend to go. And she has a sorta cute face. about 4 months i noticed the imperfections.

We were both getting dressed by the mirror the other day and it was then i really noticed that i am way too good looking for her (i am by no mean this narcisstic btw). And recently she met my parents and they was pretty dissapointed about my lack of standerds in choice.

Now the reason why i dont just want to leave her is delicate.
1) She has a rather dark and depressing backstory of child abuse and rape, shitty exs and i am the first kind of foundation in her life that she can depend on ( her words)
2) she literally has sorted out days out for the next two months. as in shes reserved stuff and put money in for events
3) Apart from the fact shes not good enough looks wise we do get along amazingly well

So guys what should i really do. I am struck as im not really looking to go all the way with her but at the same time i dont want to upset her.

I think she has the potiental to look sexy if she lost wieght and she has the rest of her life sorted out. so is it worth sticking it out for a while


Also i should mention i really have to force boners as i dont get naturall turned on by her at all anymore. Unless she give bjs but thats sometimes an issue due to her rapey past which make her go emotional


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 01, 2014 12:23 pm 
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If she loses weight ( and weight alone) can you see yourself marrying the girl?

If the answer is no; then leave her.

There is and old expression that goes " A pimple turns into a dimple when you're in love"

This happens to all of us man; you're exciting about the girl at first and then a few months later you see them for what they really are. I've been down the road many times; there has beens time when I left the girl immediately and other times where I toughed it out until past the point where I couldn't take it anymore. And all in all, it just made me unhappy. I even started to believe that the problem was me.. I found myself always looking for imperfections so I wouldn't be disappointed in the long run.

The magazine/porn industry has a lot to do with this aswell; subconsciously we are programmed to seek out perfection in women. So when we begin to see things that aren't falling inline with the models/celebrities/porn stars we instantly begin to lose attraction.

But where do you draw the line?

I think that it is important to communicate to the girl that you would like her to get into better shape, because if you don't you are just forces yourself to be with her and that is selfish on so many levels. She'll gain a false perception of the relationship and the break up thats inevitable will only hurt more when its time.

I tell all my girls I need them to stay in shape so that I can continue to feel attraction for them. And they tell me that they need to always be a man, stand strong and not take their bullshit so they can still feel attraction for me. Its in the job description; and if you aren't completing the job description, you lose the job.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 01, 2014 11:40 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2014 8:04 pm
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Location: Metro Detroit
Quote:
If she loses weight ( and weight alone) can you see yourself marrying the girl?

If the answer is no; then leave her.

There is and old expression that goes " A pimple turns into a dimple when you're in love"

This happens to all of us man; you're exciting about the girl at first and then a few months later you see them for what they really are. I've been down the road many times; there has beens time when I left the girl immediately and other times where I toughed it out until past the point where I couldn't take it anymore. And all in all, it just made me unhappy. I even started to believe that the problem was me.. I found myself always looking for imperfections so I wouldn't be disappointed in the long run.

The magazine/porn industry has a lot to do with this aswell; subconsciously we are programmed to seek out perfection in women. So when we begin to see things that aren't falling inline with the models/celebrities/porn stars we instantly begin to lose attraction.

But where do you draw the line?

I think that it is important to communicate to the girl that you would like her to get into better shape, because if you don't you are just forces yourself to be with her and that is selfish on so many levels. She'll gain a false perception of the relationship and the break up thats inevitable will only hurt more when its time.

I tell all my girls I need them to stay in shape so that I can continue to feel attraction for them. And they tell me that they need to always be a man, stand strong and not take their bullshit so they can still feel attraction for me. Its in the job description; and if you aren't completing the job description, you lose the job.
Great post.

I would like to add, after the 'honey moon' phase of a relationship, everyone starts to pick up flaws. I would argue looks only matter at first because you need to spend time with her after if you try for a relationship.

If you see no future, Eddie is absolutely right. But, from personal experience, finding a girl you click with is harder than finding a girl who is good looking and you want sex with.

She sounds like she has issues and you are sticking around for her benefit, not yours. Which is not the best thing for you.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 02, 2014 3:35 am 
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Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2013 6:34 pm
Posts: 3993
Quote:
If she loses weight ( and weight alone) can you see yourself marrying the girl?

If the answer is no; then leave her.

There is and old expression that goes " A pimple turns into a dimple when you're in love"

This happens to all of us man; you're exciting about the girl at first and then a few months later you see them for what they really are. I've been down the road many times; there has beens time when I left the girl immediately and other times where I toughed it out until past the point where I couldn't take it anymore. And all in all, it just made me unhappy. I even started to believe that the problem was me.. I found myself always looking for imperfections so I wouldn't be disappointed in the long run.

The magazine/porn industry has a lot to do with this aswell; subconsciously we are programmed to seek out perfection in women. So when we begin to see things that aren't falling inline with the models/celebrities/porn stars we instantly begin to lose attraction.

But where do you draw the line?

I think that it is important to communicate to the girl that you would like her to get into better shape, because if you don't you are just forces yourself to be with her and that is selfish on so many levels. She'll gain a false perception of the relationship and the break up thats inevitable will only hurt more when its time.

I tell all my girls I need them to stay in shape so that I can continue to feel attraction for them. And they tell me that they need to always be a man, stand strong and not take their bullshit so they can still feel attraction for me. Its in the job description; and if you aren't completing the job description, you lose the job.
My ex actually told me that if I lost my muscle/got out of shape she'd dump me. Thank god she's my EX.


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