| Truth is a lot of the time LESS is MORE.
Say you're going to purchase a car, and aren't quite sure on the one. Are you going to be inclined to buy car A that is being pushed heavily by the sales guy, or car B that is equally as attractive to you, but this sales guy isn't pushing it on you and letting the car (e.g. mileage, functionality, design) speak for itself?
That said, NOT escalating is a DLV, or at least gets you compartmentalized into the friend or non-interested group. Women want to FEEL sexy, masculine energy by default is the YIN to her YANG - it's whats going to push those buttons that make her feel gooey and wet inside; she needs US for that, our MASCULINE energy.
If you're not escalating, you aren't doing shit. Sure, there are times when you're friended only to realize later that she was dropping hints that she wanted more, and yes sometimes you can recover, other times not so much. But the reality is escalation is a key component in pushing those sexual buttons within her, it gets her fantasizing, it stimulates her on so many levels not just the physical (most orgasms are achieved through mental stimulation less so physical, so its not just about stimulating her clit or kissing the nape of her shoulders/neck.
Your friends stayed too long promoting comfort and did not pose as sexual threats to her, how boring. I feel bad for her cause she knows they're time wasters and its going nowhere. Completely ASEXUAL relationships - maybe she needs more friends though, who knows?!?
Escalation (so far as she'll let you go before stopping you) is extremely sexy, it's a MASSIVE DHV and shows you know how to take charge (DHV - most women want to be submissive in the bedroom to their man), are willing to take risks (DHV), are assertive (DHV), all of which are mentally turning her on by this point (DHV).
Also remember, which you seem to have down, is to NOT talk so much (less is more, remember). Talking a lot kills sexual tension, UNLESS the context of the talk is sexual in nature but even still keep it to a minimum. Talking can also be construed as you being anxious, or even narcissistic, or just annoying - seriously who wants to hear someone go into a monologue unless they're on stage performing a comedy act or skit. Talking though can be a good excuse to escalate...move in close to her, soft voice, speak a bit slower, be suggestive, close to her ear so she can smell you, feel your presence, be fluid about it if you're mechanical she'll sense it and you'll look like a fucking creeper (she'll blame you for her awkward feeling too, don't kid yourself). Most guys blow themselves out by talking too much - a man of action is far more attractive any day. Also, what most guys don't realize is they already had the girl (ironically) before they had begun running their mouthes and being circus clowns or magicians with a bag full of corny technique, lines, and other canned material.
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