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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2014 5:39 pm 
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I've been flirting with a girl from college in the library in the build up to our exams however she finished last week and I finish tomorrow and despite me inviting her to come with her and my friends to go for a drink after she probably isn't able to come. So I just said, okay maybe I'll see you some other time.

We're going to a festival in the same festival group in 2 weeks time, however I'm worried as we won't speak it'll fizzle out before then. She also seems the type of girl with whom if I were to express a romantic interest blatantly, she'd be rather put off.

I don't know what to do here guys.

I'd really appreciate some help right now.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2014 7:09 pm 
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Grow some balls be direct and ask her out on date.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2014 7:49 pm 
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Grow some balls be direct and ask her out on date.
I have no anxiety about asking girls out on dates, my only reluctance is that'll kill the attraction of me as I'm currently unattainable in her eyes.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 22, 2014 7:52 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Grow some balls be direct and ask her out on date.
I have no anxiety about asking girls out on dates, my only reluctance is that'll kill the attraction of me as I'm currently unattainable in her eyes.

Wow, really? And she told this, or you're a mind reader?

Reality Check: Women don't want "unattainable" guys, at all, EVER. Why pursue something you know is a waste of energy (no possibility of a beneficial outcome)? Being a bit elusive is one thing, being inaccessible or "unattainable" another entirely.


Here's what happens when you look "unattainable" to women:

-you look like a pussy, too afraid to make a move, and when she realizes whatever attraction she may have had towards you will be gone, poof, and you won't ever get it back; if you aren't willing to escalate things, another guy will and she'll have plenty of those if not already
-you look like a buddy because the relationship is completely asexual
-she thinks you're disinterested (or gay, or both)

So young fellow, you see, when you say "unattainable" I can't help but laugh.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2014 7:15 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Grow some balls be direct and ask her out on date.
I have no anxiety about asking girls out on dates, my only reluctance is that'll kill the attraction of me as I'm currently unattainable in her eyes.

Wow, really? And she told this, or you're a mind reader?

Reality Check: Women don't want "unattainable" guys, at all, EVER. Why pursue something you know is a waste of energy (no possibility of a beneficial outcome)? Being a bit elusive is one thing, being inaccessible or "unattainable" another entirely.


Here's what happens when you look "unattainable" to women:

-you look like a pussy, too afraid to make a move, and when she realizes whatever attraction she may have had towards you will be gone, poof, and you won't ever get it back; if you aren't willing to escalate things, another guy will and she'll have plenty of those if not already
-you look like a buddy because the relationship is completely asexual
-she thinks you're disinterested (or gay, or both)

So young fellow, you see, when you say "unattainable" I can't help but laugh.
I took your advice and said "hey let's get a drink this week. When you free?" She saw this message half hour ago and hasn't replied. I did invite her to an end of exams celebration I organised today at a bar but she couldn't go as her sis was home from uni. This was Saturday I invited her, so was today too soon to ask her out.

I have depression and having been flaked on by another girl a few weeks I'm feeling pretty shit.

Any advice is appreciated again.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2014 7:19 pm 
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This is why it's best to act sooner rather than later. You'll at least find out if she's interested, also it's more attractive that a guy escalates rather than lingers (looks like low self-confidence).

I wouldn't take it personally it could be a variety of reasons she hasn't responded. Focus on your inner game, building a strong 'core' because right now it sounds like your every interaction AND MOOD is based on the woman's response to you or at least your perceptions of her response. This isn't a healthy way to get into the game. Start with YOU, have a solid relationship with yourself so you're grounded and not shaken by her lack of responsiveness, shit tests or whatever.

Take this as an indicator that the emphasis should be on you now, to get rid of the depression, to start feeling good about yourself again, having goals etc.. This is your opportunity.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2014 8:36 pm 
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This is only semi-related to your exact problem SPAM, but it stood out to me.

Girls with very, very rare exceptions are too busy to see a guy they're interested in. Have I heard friends say they were too busy to go on a date with some regular guy? Yes. But I've also heard them drop scheduled plans for the guy she's really into. And this assumes the girl always has something to do. Honestly, most hot girls spend their fair share of time slumped in a beanbag chain mindlessly watching tv for hours because she has nothing interesting to do.

If she really truly is too busy and likes you(say her sister's 18th birthday party is that time), she will tell you she's busy then, and then either ask how your schedule looks or tell you times when she's free. But only if she's actually interested in you. It sounds to me like this girl may have found you interesting, but she wasn't all that strongly attracted.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2014 11:19 pm 
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She replied saying she's busy in the evenings this week but asked if I'm out clubbing tomorrow night to which I said I'm probably not, but are you free next Monday? I let a girl friend of mine write the text. It sounded good. My friend has told me she likes me, and her phone died the other day and my my friend offered to text me on her behalf to let me know it's dead but she said "no that'll look too keen!" So she's defnitely one of those girls.


Also she took 4hrs to respond to my message and I accidentally opened it on facebook straight away so only took about 40 mins to respond. Was that shit?


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 23, 2014 11:58 pm 
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2 things of note to etch in your head:
-girls like being pursued
-we re often the last to know (she's interested) so just assume she is whether she actually is or isn't


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2014 12:10 pm 
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Quote:
2 things of note to etch in your head:
-girls like being pursued
-we re often the last to know (she's interested) so just assume she is whether she actually is or isn't

So should I stop pursuing? I'm going to see her at a festival in 2 weeks time so I could wait until then. I'm thinking about starting talking to another girl in order to spread out my risk (I'm not in the financial industry (yet)).


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2014 3:08 pm 
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Quote:
2 things of note to etch in your head:
-girls like being pursued
-we re often the last to know (she's interested) so just assume she is whether she actually is or isn't

So should I stop pursuing? I'm going to see her at a festival in 2 weeks time so I could wait until then. I'm thinking about starting talking to another girl in order to spread out my risk (I'm not in the financial industry (yet)).
Never. Always exhaust all leads u got nothing to lose. Never stop until she says fuck off


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 12:45 am 
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I usually call and ask for dates now, like the whole texting and asking for dates, she can ignore you. On the phone its alot harder to, either yes or no.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 1:56 am 
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I usually call and ask for dates now, like the whole texting and asking for dates, she can ignore you. On the phone its alot harder to, either yes or no.
I do too mate. I haven't actually got this girls number yet, it's all over facebook message. Should have got it really.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 2:03 am 
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Quote:
Here's what happens when you look "unattainable" to women:

-you look like a pussy, too afraid to make a move, and when she realizes whatever attraction she may have had towards you will be gone, poof, and you won't ever get it back; if you aren't willing to escalate things, another guy will and she'll have plenty of those if not already
-you look like a buddy because the relationship is completely asexual
-she thinks you're disinterested (or gay, or both)

So young fellow, you see, when you say "unattainable" I can't help but laugh.
Perfect!


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 2:06 am 
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Quote:
I usually call and ask for dates now, like the whole texting and asking for dates, she can ignore you. On the phone its alot harder to, either yes or no.
I do too mate. I haven't actually got this girls number yet, it's all over facebook message. Should have got it really.
You get it now! "Do you have SPAM/Viber/BBM/whatever else?" Then just exchange numbers. It really is that simple. Do it now!!


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