Hey Guys

Well I have been out with this girl a couple times, I thought it was going pretty well then she texts me today saying roughly

"Iv been doing some thinking and I don't think I want to take this further, I like you its just I'm too busy to give you the attention you deserve. I'm just enjoying my freedom at the moment and I want to continue doing my own thing"

to which I responded

"Yeah I can totally respect that need for freedom I feel the same way, I think your a great person and I have allot of respect for you, I would be open to some no strings attached fun if that's your thing?"

To which she responded

"Thanks for understanding, I do like you I'm just not at that place right now, I'm a bit of an all or nothing kinda girl so not sure about the no strings attached thing but you never know"


I literally have no clue how to approach a reply to this. Any you guys help?. I'm not long back into game and I'v not been having the success I used to enjoy. Need to get out there more but I really want to close with this girl.

Leave it like it is, you've made your points clear. If she's interested she'll be in touch. If she doesn't contact you, try again in a couple of months.

Sound advice, thanks man

its like, you said, "you are bla bla bla bla can we have sex sometimes", she probably thought, "another sucker, lets use him a bit, to get the daily attention portion, sex is the last thing he going to get".
she FZed you, let it go, if she going to contact you first, then game her.

You're looking to her to lead and thats the biggest no no too many men are making today. She doesn't want to LEAD she just wants to know how you feel about her; so she can feel comfortable with you LEADING.

Everything a woman says is either a test or a celebration and this my friend was a test. Its a woman's way of seeing what is going on in your head. Its her way of seeing how you feel about her and what direction you want things to go in.

Do you know how many times a girl has said to me " This isn't working out. We should break up" and I just said "No" and they said " What do you mean no? " And I'm like " I like you. We're not breaking up".

They respond with this little " Oh " type face. As if their relieved to know I care about them and then we move forward.

Don't look for a woman to okay your decision. She's looking for you to make the final call.

All you have to do is say " I'll give you a call; we'll talk later"

I wouldn't hash things like this out over a message that could be interpreted a thousand different ways.

Be stronger man and more importantly.. Be a leader.

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I think I will just leave it and move on for now, maybe give her a shout in a month or two. If she gets in touch then good, but if like you said i'v been fz'd I think chasing her more will just put her further into the zone.
What you guys think. Should I leave it without replying, or should I respond with a "Ok, i'll call you sometime" and then leave it at that?

I just sent her a text with "Yeah, I'll give you a call. Talk later"

And that's the last shes going to hear from me for atleast a couple months

It's fascinating how people will take a suggestion that sounds manly and authoritative and water it down for no good reason. Eddie's suggestion was great because it twice contained the word WILL, or a contraction of it. The way he worded it, WILL was the essence of the statement, and that's exactly what it showed. You added in "yeah", which just makes you sound vague and distracted. And you took the "we'll" out of "we'll talk later".

Eddie's way, you've completed relieved her of the responsibility of having to figure the situation out. You've just told her what's going to happen. And believe it or not, I don't think women want to have their point of views taken THAT seriously. That's why I think the shit she was saying WAS a test. Eddie's text implied "you've got some ideas into your head, we'll discuss how you'll come back to my way of thinking later".

_________________
If something's not fun, it's not worth doing

If I ever need a lawyer, I'm giving you a call Cliff.

That was awesome

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Well its to late to mull over it now, I wasn't expecting her to be throwing tests at me at this stage. In the future I'll know to look out for this stuff a bit more. We've been talking mostly every day for like two weeks so when that dries up and she knows I'm not going to pine after her she might think a little differently.

What do you guys think, given a bit of time this might be a salvageable situation? I mean its not like I completely destroyed myself by saying anything out of order

Just call her man. You're thinking too much.

Its salvageable if YOU say its salvageable because you're the LEADER. Stop looking for someone else's approval or someone else's go ahead an be your own leader. Otherwise you'll find yourself in this same situation with the next girl and then the one after that.

Pick up your phone and call her right now.

Do it.

_________________
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To add to the earlier comments she may have been also thinking that perhaps you don't like her all that much depending on the level of physicality that was or wasn't present when you hung out. Hence the test of the waters to see how YOU really feel.

She stated "not sure about the no strings attached thing but you never know".

"BUT YOU NEVER KNOW." !!!!

The fact that she replied this way to such a factual statement of a booty call relationship indicates that she may be down if you lead things right.

Initially could have replied with "yeh im not really a no strings guy either etc etc" and worked in another meetup where the two of u could feel things out.

You think I should reinitiate and work it toward that?

You have a better feel for where things are but at that point in time she gave you an UNBELIEVABLE opening with the "but you never know", basically as far as many women will ever go to overtly stating "yes I'm down for FWB booty calls only."

She didn't like you so move on. You went out a couple of times and she was looking for something else. No tests here; from not making a move and caring abt a girl u went out with twice, honestly I can see why she wanted to call it quits. That's not an insult. Learn from it, escalate next time and get more girls. Call her and convince her if you want but ask yourself why it matters so much after 2 dates? If you had other girls you'd be used to girls falling off. And if you're after sex with her, should have made a move long before this.