So I'm talking to this girl on OkCupid, she seems ok, relatively cute. She's into Crossfit and I just started it, she messaged me initially when I put that in my profile.

Anyway, we've been talking about fitness and ourselves for a couple weeks now, on and off.

I've invited her out twice now, both casually. The first time she declined with no reschedule attempt. The second time she ignored it completely.

Yet she's still entirely responsive.

So what is going on here? My guess is that she feels we'll either move in the same circles, or she's waiting to see how dedicated I am to fitness (I'm not in bad shape, but I'm not muscular by any means)/Crossfit.

I can't think of any other reason a girl would be continually responsive while also ignoring any sort of invites out.


Any ideas? I'm just playing it cool now and ignoring her implicit rejections.

Ego trip for her, likes having a guy pursue her, has no immediate interest in you, has another guy she's more interested in and first wants to see where it goes…

The list goes on. It can be a number of causes. First of all, get her phone number and get off messaging on OKC. If she won't give you her phone number then that's a very strong sign she has no intent of every meeting you in person and you need to stop wasting your time.

have you checked to see if she is actually who she says she is? talked to her on phone, got her to take a picture of herself with something unique (holding up a sign or something) so you know it's her?

Oh I'm not worried about that, it doesn't come off as a catfish. I believe she is who she says she is. If she's using me for ego, then that's fine by me. I don't really see her as a "girlfriend" girl anyway, I'd have just seduced her and kept her as a FWB.

Except your chances of making her a FWB are just as faint and blurry as making her a girlfriend.

If you're talking to her on OKCupid and it's been weeks since you first started talking, you missed your window. Cut your losses and move on.

_________________
"Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"

She's not interested in you. Chalk it, walk it.

Well, that was if we had met up. I just found her behavior curious, as I've never had a girl keep talking when she lacked interest. Usually they just stop responding.

I'm seeing a few girls already, so I'm not exactly crying here.

I had the same thing before msg'd this girl we talked all was well then she stopped replying. I tried once more she seemed really interested both times that's why I thought maybe she was testing me by not replying, but then she stopped again I said fuck it and moved on I suggest you do the same.

When a girl stops responding to you, Gunfighter, that means she isn't interested. Though you can occasionally ping them every few months and sometimes get a response - cute girls on these sites get 20-50 messages a day from guys, and it's hard for them to respond to all of them. That's one reason why I was surprised at this girl responding consistently. Lack of response made sense in my reality, continued responsiveness with no desire to meet up didn't as much.

My ex who I dated for a few months, I didn't actually meet up with (and she didn't even respond) until I'd messaged her for the third time (I didn't even remember it, but she did, and brought it up after we had been dating a few weeks). So every now and again (if the girl is on the site for months), just ping the girl again. She may not be wholly uninterested - she may just have way too many messages, be busy, or already have some guys she sees as worthy catches that she's talking to.