Work Colleagues - Dealing with curiosity ?



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PostPosted: Tue Mar 11, 2014 10:03 am 
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Good afternon guys and tks for reading my topic. a good week, weekend to all.




This is more a social question, nonetheless here it goes.



Last weekend i brough an HB home, which i met in a club and that works in the same place than me. (In another departement) im not really into "work game" due to the risks but would say this was an exception....since she pushed it and always gave me very strong IOIs.... (we were out one ore two more times before)


Anyway we were in the club, so basically we hang out for an hour, i moved her, social proof with the same friends (co-workers) and isolated, and extract her. Brought her for a quick drink at my place, overcome RUm and that was it. In the club, Nevertheless, just before i isolated her, we shared a kiss, seen by two or three female friends of mine and co-workers. Then isolation and we left. So on monday one of the girls who saw it comes up to me and says

HB: Wanna telll me what happened last night ? How did your night ended ? You just disappered-...
Me: Not sure i remember, i was drunk...
HB: Come on, you dont drink so much, you re just ashamed/afraid to tell...
Me...
HB: I will find out........




So how show i act in this situation ? What woulld be the alpha position ? (I dont like playing the innocent but i frequently do) Has anyone came across something like this ?





Opinions are very welcomed


:)


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 11, 2014 10:18 am 
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Don't shit where you eat.

Everyone learns this, but office romances have the potential to be volatile. HR will take that woman's word over yours if things ever escalated out of hand. Even if you don't get to that point, you become the focal point of all the gossip. People will ask questions and, even if you don't answer, they will get the answers. Anonymity and privacy is every man's gift; don't piss it away.

Be known for your work ethic at work and not where you put your dick.

_________________
"Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 12, 2014 11:24 am 
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Thanks for the awesome feedback Jones. Like stated, i do agree with that, and value my privacy so i learned the lesson and believe it wont happen again.





Now, is there anyway to deal with these "icomments" ?





Opinions are welcomed


:)


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 13, 2014 12:06 am 
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First response gave good advice, but I get what you're saying, OP. It's spilled milk and "don't cry" isn't a great guide as to how to clean up milk.

Just act non-chalant and unphased. It's none of your co-worker's business and don't spill the beans, but be polite in refusing to give out information. Being slick about it and changing the topic subtly is a skill that everyone should learn. This is the time to practice it. Stick with your story and talk to your hookup about it. See where she stands about co-workers prying and finding out. If she's like you and really doesn't want it to happen, assure her that you'll keep it cool and smoothly rebuff all inquiries (and tell her exactly what your cover story that you told to your co-worker is) and get her to do the same. It can be done if you work together, don't get frazzled and succumb to pressure. Next time, just say something like "I'm not sure, I was drunk." and change the topic. If they persist, tell them something like "I wish I knew the answer to everything, too. Then I'd bet all my money in Vegas!", laugh and bring up something else.

This might end ugly, but in the future, try and be extra scrupulous about not letting co-workers see you kiss. Try and co-ordinate with her to somehow get out of there separately so that it doesn't look like you're leaving together, and then meet up somewhere else where you can take her back to your place. Not easy, but co-workers suck. They have no lives of their own, so they want to entertain themselves by interfering in yours.


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