So there's this girl im really into @ my college, been having a crush on her for more than 2 years so far. I wasn't planning on finding a girl that time, but for some reason when that girl just passed by once, I ALMOST FELL APART!!! So i started asking alot of people that i know that know her friends about her, WHO IS THAT CHICK? , i came out with a lil bit of info about her. Unfortunatly she's not in the same department im in, apparently she studies Architecture and im studying Electrical Engineering which rly sucks. Every time i see her during gaps and break times, i feel like my heart's sinking. It pisses me off, im just standing there not doing anything. Apparently in my country, walking up to a girl n randomly talking 2 her is actually kinda CREEPY according to most females no matter what u look like and thats what makes it really hard. I've been told that she's a shy person. I am shy sometimes when i meet NEW girls but then it gets better when i get to know them better [ working on NOT getting shy at all ]. According to the girls i know, once i catch them eye contacting me, i do the opening n it goes well after all. Now according to the chick i like, i could tell we make eye contact most of the time. We also do the '' i look away she looks '' n vice versa. I have seen her a few times outside college and YEAH im pretty sure she recognised me but won't do anything cuz she doesn't really know me. If she doesn't get freaked out when i approach her, things would be alot easier. I mean i don't mind walking up 2 her, sayin '' Hi '' or w/e, but my greatest fear, is that she gets all creeped out. I know ima nice n a polite person, n alot of people know that, im also good looking and satisfied. I just don't know what i should do. Having a crush on her for more than 2 years and not able to tell her really pisses me off. She already met most of my requirements, i only gotta befriend her 1st. I really hate doing nothing, im also afraid she gets taken any time soon. Does any1 have any solutions to my problem?

You can talk to her on facebook..is more simple if you have approach anxiety.Something like:Hi/i saw you at college/in what department you are?:D.She says ''at architecture''..and you can expand the subject(how is there?/how was your finals?)....it worked for me;)

Take her off the pedestal.

It's just a girl. Her shit stinks just like yours.

You don't want to creep her out? Don't creep her out then. Be normal and go talk to her. Your constant eye contact games and then running off without saying anything are what's going to creep her out in the end...

If your gut tells you she finds you attractive - then just walk up and say hello. Introduce yourself and talk to her casually for a few mins. Tell her you've got to run to another class in 2 mins but just wanted to say hi cause you've seen her around, if it helps.

Good luck.

You have two options:

1. FInd a way to get her. Then she'll make you feel like your value has increased. But if you lose her, you'll be back to square one.. in fact, you'll be back to square -1 as you won't have worked on your inner-game for the duration of your relationship with this girl.

2. Develop the feelings of self-appreciation and self-reliance within yourself, so that girls like her naturally come into your life and stay there. If she leaves... you're still the same high-value guy.


Which one sounds better? And which one implies the greater degree of responsibility?

Have at it!

CoolHand.

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Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
- Mark Twain

I sometimes find the simpler you make it in your mind the easier it is. She's a human-being just like you are, and if you don't talk to her won't you regret it? Personally I'd rather talk to her and give it a shot then regret it for an unspecified amount of time. Get used to rejection, it happens. The sooner you do that the less scared you will be to talk to women. If she rejects you so what? Not the end of the world.

Don't over think it. Personally I'd just introduce yourself to her with a simple "Hello, I'm such and such" and go from there. Ask her about her major, hobbies, etc. if you are in a setting to do so. If you aren't just introduce yourself, get her name, and make up something. Ask her for directions. Then at least you know her name and can talk to her again in the future.

You remind me of myself, falling for girls and thinking there are no better or other ones like "this one" out there. Over-thinking and over-chasing.There are women just as good or better.

Good luck!

That. Right there. You have psyched yourself out. You have taken that bit of "information" and made yourself believe it's true.

Do this for me: DON'T EVER TAKE ADVICE FROM WOMEN ABOUT PICK UP, EVER!!!! The reason is because most women don't even know what they want or what they like. They don't choose what line their future husband introduces himself with, they only choose him after the fact. They will usually lead your ass astray with bullshit that winds up making you AFC. Read your post once again with that info... do you sound AFC?

Wise up and act fast, man. If this girl is as hot/beautiful as you claim she is, she will be snatched up by someone without those self-limiting beliefs you have. NO QUESTION ABOUT IT. You think you're the only one eyeing this girl? HELL NO. Someone on this board quoted Gretzky, and is so right on "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." You better take it, bro.

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"You ain't accustomed of going through customs. You ain't been nowhere, huh?"

General tips:

-If you're shy, just ask a friend to introduce you to her. Arrange some sort of get together and make sure your friend gets her to go.

-You can introduce yourself to her, have a brief conversation, get a her number, go out on a date with her

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The ultimate lesson of psychoanalysis is that human life is never "just life": we are possessed by the strange drive to enjoy life in excess, attached to a surplus which derails the ordinary run of things.
-Slavoj Zizek