The background is pretty much straightforward. I'm trying to game a girl from my office wich has friendzoned me. And on the friendship level things are cool. In fact I'm pretty sure I'm her best friend and only constant in her life. So much that I allowed her some room, more than I allow anyone else. Now that has come to bite me in the ass.

The girl came into my office asking for help with something she coudn't do. I walked with her all the way to the other side of the building. When we were going into her office she veered towards the reception desk to look at some male model kind of dude. That was it for me. I turned my back and went back to my desk. A few minutes later she texted me:

"Where did you ran off to? I just saw a steaming hot guy on the receprion hahaha"

"Came back to finish my job. You know, the one I interupted on perpose to go help you. Now solve your own shit or ask the guy at the reception to help you"

"Looooooooool where did that came from?"

I left it at that. Later she came to my office to chat for a bit. I kept it civil but cold. I mean, even if I was not intersted in that girl I would have done the exact same thing. I don't take that kind of crap, and leaving me hanging in the hallway to go look at some random dude like she has never seen a man in her life after I had crossed the building and dropped my own work to help her, well, that is just disrespectfull, and I would not admit that crap from my supervisors, let alone a coworker who is on my level. Below me, if you count seniority.

Now, was that good? I think I displayed some alpha behaviour, but I'm worried it might have shown some insecurity. How would you have played it?

Also, if the matter ever comes up, I was thinking about saying what I just wrote, about me droping my work to help her and she leaving me hanging in the hallway, how that was disrespectfull, that I don't take crap like that from nobody and that she is no exception.

As a bonus, she dresses "colorfully" on an enviroment dominated by old ladys so she has heard more than one less than nice remarks. I was thinking about adding a "You went runing like you have never seen a man in your life, and then you wonder people talk. Have some self respect". How do you think that would turn out?

Thank you!

You handled that very, very poorly, sorry to say. There was nothing alpha about that at all. You handled it all with pure negative emotion and now you look whiny, not to mention random as fuck considering you went from being friends to some over-the-top jealous, aggressive monster. I don't know if this is your normal personality or if you're just reading into how pickup works improperly, but regardless, you need to make some serious changes to your inner game before you even consider finding a woman.

How should you have handled it, you ask? By not reacting at all. Women are going to be attracted to other men. Deal with it. There is no reason to have made a big deal about this at all.

Don't get angry with her, you need to laugh that shit off, don't be cold with her, act as if nothing's happened! That's a bad way to go showing that you care,need to be more laid back, flirt with the other women at your work!

Why did you want to become her girlfriend? Is that the only way you felt you could get close to her?
Your her girlfriend, that's what girlfriends do
Alpha? Oh fuck no not alpha! That was the girly-est public display worthy of revoking your Man-Card - You voluntarily turned your balls over to her from day one!

Chalk this one up to 'lost cause', the closest you'll ever get to her panties is scrubbing other dudes sperm out of them while your doing her laundry.
Now you got your titty pinched and you want to cry to her? God help us as men!
You can't have her, so join up with the other girls for your own moral support? Do you squat when you pee?

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Thank you all. Especially Snarg.

Yes, in retrospect I see I acted hot headedly. The thing that really got me pissed off was that I went out of my way to help her, when I had absolutely no obligation to do so, and she just left me hanging like I am her servant and should wait until she was done with it. I was not even thinking about game when I did it, I was just plain old pissed off.

So, I'll just pretend it did not happen. If she brings it up, I'll probably just explain I was swamped in work, went out of my way, over-reacted and was having a bad day. Would you do something diferent? Any more advice, I'm all ears.

You prob not gonna recover this 1 bro! But just make sure your in a good mood and smiling tomorrow, don't let her know things like that get to you! When she pulled you over to see that guy you should of said " I hope they bring out the female models next, cos we need some eye candy in here!, and that's when you should of walked off!

If she brings it up I'd apologize and let her know that I was having a bad day and shouldn't have taken it out on her. But as far as having any hope of getting with her, I'm sorry to say that's pretty much gone forever.

Best thing.
Leave the 'blame' out of it.


Then leave it completely.

Separate from her.

We know what you're thinking. You hate this part. You want to scream and cry and kick your legs and say, "No! I can't! I need her!!!" Well, crack addicts hate to stop doing crack, too. You're thinking, "If I'm not always in their face, she'll forget about me," when in fact the exact opposite is true. The more you're out of the picture, the more she will be thinking of you.


"The Separation" is the most important stage of getting out of the Friend Zone, and Bro that's where you are deeply rooted. If you don't give them a minute to miss you, they never, ever will. I promise you that.

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.