So four days ago, I hit it off with a customer, we'll call her Katelyn, at the bar I tend at, on a Thursday night. She is GORGEOUS but a little punky (plugs, big glasses, side-of-the-head shave, all that bs) and very dorky. Worth mentioning that I'm a musician and a bit of a punk-rock style myself. I am a casual acquaintance with the female friend she showed up with, and was flirty with/did the friend a favor right off the bat, and flirting with all the other female customers openly, raising proof more. I flirted very obviously and heavily with Katelyn right in front of a group of her friends and a guy I presumed to be her boyfriend initially (he wasn't), having her put her number in my phone for me (entered her full name plus a <3). All is looking well.

That night I use her full name to do a quick Facebook scan. Turns out the girl is a career runway model. Okay, so maybe not the easy-to-impress dork I though I signed up for. Next afternoon I text her simply "hey Katelyn! it's [shurk] from [the bar]. save my number!" Positive response from her with a smiley, within a minute of my text sent. All is looking well.

The next day I send my next text to set up a meet. I have her come visit me at work during the day, a bit before I get off my shift. She shows up with the same female friend but seems a little distant this time. While her friend is still there, she's a little disengaged, body language not open to me, checks her phone a few times. I'm honestly convinced it's a lost cause. She starts to warm up a bit though, especially when the friend leaves -- responding to my jokes enthusiastically, playing with her hair INCESSANTLY, embracing my kino (hand on her back, she pushes her legs back against mine when I make contact, body language towards/open to me, warmly holding my hand when I turn her arm to view a tattoo) but very little kino instigated on her part. We stick at the bar for about another hour -- then I tell her I have to take the dog for a walk ( I did, but it was also a perfect excuse to change venues and get her to my apartment ). It's worth mentioning that at no time did I buy or offer her a drink, she took care of herself.

We walk up to my place and she continues vivid conversation, is very visibly impressed with my apartment, sits down on the couch and plays with my dog while I gather things, we stick around and sit and talk for a bit. I did notice however, that she specifically avoided the bedroom where I was grabbing things for a bit – women normally have no problem walking right in and hanging out – my room's very centrally located and honestly is sexy as fuck.

So at the bar she told me she has a nephew's birthday party to attend (this is all still quite early – she came to the bar around 4 pm). I assume it's simply a possible out she's inventing so she can bail early scott-free if needed. So it's clear after the dog walk this is going to end. I walk her back to her car and she drives back to my place, where I go in for the k-close. And this is where it gets weird -– she dead-lips me. I go in and she kisses back only slightly, so I pull back, smile, and go in again. Same shit. So I give her a giant grin and bang out the line "Just checking" (which I normally give girls, when the kiss goes very well it always gets them going and puts a little blush on their face). We talk for another minute or so, then I grab the dog and tell her I'll see her soon and go upstairs.

I was ready to call this a lost cause -– that kiss response was so weak I'm convinced she's not interested, despite the perceived IOIs throughout the day. So I take a shower and head back out to meet some friends and another lady who's around....and then, within a half hour of Katelyn leaving, I get a text from her, simply a photo of her nephew's birthday cake and the question: "cake?" (we made a lot of cake jokes during the day). I respond with a short answer a half hour later, within 5 minutes she replies, 20 mins later I message her a callback joke and she gives me a wordy reply.

So....physically, I feel she shot me down. But she kept not just engaging, but INITIATING contact. Enthusiastically.

So...worth a shot? I was planning on not even trying to set up a day 2. If it's worth it, how long should I wait to make contact, or should I even? I was thinking about a short text tomorrow for a meetup later this week, but I dunno at this point if I should bother.

thanks.

Well, ok it's not a perfect date. But how perfect do you need it to be? Ok, so the kiss was a little weak, but who knows what's going on in her life, it could be any one of a million things.. Perhaps you look like a guy who hurt her once, maybe she was shy, maybe she was worried about her breath because someone insulted her about it when she was 6 yrs old...

If you told us that she spent the evening insulting an ex boyfriend, or that she was constantly asking you about money etc etc then I'd say run for the hills. But as she didn't do anything terrible, I say see her again and allow for imperfections along the way!

CoolHand.

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Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
- Mark Twain

I think I hesitate largely because every girl I've been with recently has been a simple, instant lay. But this girl is, for sure, of a higher caliber than anyone I've come across since my last LTR. Perhaps it's a matter of recalibrating to a more demanding series of shit-tests....I'm just trying not to pursue without clear, clear interest.

An alpha male would assume interest!

She's on a date with you, she likes you, she's just not opening the faucet up 100% from day one. If you're used to it being easy then I say welcome this challenge as it'll help you grow.

_________________
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
- Mark Twain