| As a man who recently has been at the receiving end of this situation or as you colorfully put it "beta faggot", I cannot throw my two cents objectively detaching emotions from my statement. I will therefore do not say anything in that regard. What I can tell you is this:
1. Not unlike other known 200,000 species of mammals, humans are not sexually monogamous. Evolution has compelled us to become socially monogamous, but it really stops there, i.e., if you don't go for it, someone else will, so it all comes down to your "moral code" and the fact that whether or not you "mind" if something similar happens to you, and chances are it will. Don't fool yourself. I am a hell hound when it comes to sex, and I went the whole nine yards for my relationship, yet it still happened. You can't fight biology, not to mention her patterns and lack of self control (dry-humping or what have you).
2. As Odyn mentioned, you may have acted rashly and jumped the gun. Never loose your composure in front of girls. Apropos, it seems that this girl is playing you, and the messenger (read co-worker) is in cahoots with her conveniently conveying messages to you at the right time. You played right into her hands by losing your temper and by extension your game. She is throwing a bone after the argument to keep you around so she could have "options". Should she decide to dump the guy, you will be there to fill the void (pun intended). So if you want to play this game, know that you underestimated your opponent. My suggestion as Odyn put it, is to act like nothing happened. She probably has others like you around though so don't oversell it, or else you're history.
Best of luck
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CHAT