A simple pick up:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51V1VMkuyx0

Yesterday was an epic night.

I had a party because it was the birthday of two of my co workers. Place was crowded with people, a really small place, and after having some drinks we started dancing.

I had a couple of girls around me, that I knew wanted something from me =)
A couple I had no interest in, I knew I could pull one to her place but I don`t really like her.

And then, in the middle of the dancefloor when I`m having such fun, a buddy points out to me that a girl is totally checking me out. I look at her, strong eye contact, smile, my friend was right.

I play hard to get, dance around her, barely touching her with my hands while dancing next to her but not with her. Then I take out dancing tons of coworkers, I wanted to keep having fun and not putting my ego on the line.

After going out to have some fresh air, a girl suddenly hits me with this line: You came here with a frowning face, you were in a bad mood weren`t you?

This girl was checking me out too, and she is a friend of one of the two having their birthday; but I didn`t knew her and she was calling my attention.

My reply: Oh yeah, but have you checked out the tons of fun people is having inside there? I was right in the middle of it until now

She smiles and says something among the lines of ok, and I head back inside; to dance again around this girl that was checking me out.

This other girl that was outside came inside and danced near to me, her friend makes eyes to me that I should take her to dance, so I repeat my little dance of barely touching her. Both this girls were responding really well, like the wanted me to grab her hands for a spin.

Then I see that first girl and I go in, I realized I was just affraid of putting my ego on the line; and I thought: fuck that.

Hand on her lower back, I ask her if she wants to give me her phone number and we get in touch later. She asks me: later? So I say: Yeah, so we can see each other again. What`s your name?
Valentina.
As we kept talkinng, eye contact was stronger and I was getting really close to this girls, I look at her lips and I knew she wanted me to kiss her. So I went in for the kiss after saying my name.

Rejected.

She moved her face to a side but barely, now that I think about it, with a little bit more time and just being a little more persistant I would have got that kiss and probably a lay.

For years now I`ve been scared about closing and even dancing with girls, because in my mind dancing leads to nowhere. Turns out I am wrong, it`s physicall escalation, something that I should learn if I want to get were I say I do.

So for the next time, just open with: You can`t espect to see me like that and not dance with me. And just pull her for a dance and chill, give the interaction time and it will develop.

Attraction is already there, I don`t have to do anything other than just being around that girl touching and whispering in her ear. After that a k close and I know my way to bed after k closing.

Why am I SO fucking SCARED about kiss closing? Why the fuck am I so naive about something that`s actually natural to happen.

And most of all: If some girls are showing lots of interest in me, shouldn`t I be closing every single one of them? Even the ones that I baraley like?

Stop thinking you can have the beauty Bond, you have nothing on your hands happening for you. Change that, then we`ll talk about the beautys.

Last tuesday I was at my place chillin, when I get a text from this cutie at work to go have some drinks to a bar near my flat. A friend of her just became a psychologyst and she was having a party.

Turned out to be a really small party, but we managed to get drunk lol.

About this cutie: She runs some game, wich means she`s already got a coworker eating from her palm; and in no time I could be no exception.

Nothing went down other than a couple of strong hugs and light kino with her, she just broke up with her boyfriend and she wants some validation outta guys chasing her.

This is why I decided to stop focusing so much on this particular girl. She`s playing me, and she`s winning.

So time to make a couple of adjustments.

After asking her for a couple of hugs she gave me, I realised why the fuck do I verbalize my intent? Why am I ASKING for shit?

This reminded me about kasabi`s old advice on stop traeting my life as if it were a fast food restaurant: I want a hug. I want a kiss. I wanna fuck.

This is NOT the best game I could run. This is a really poor concept of game, if not game at all.

What I never wrote in here is that I accept now that I run what I think is "game" around women, and it`s really poor and lacking of inner game and skills.

Basically after building some comfort I would ask the girl to kiss me, or I would do the mystery`s routine on: you were thinking about kiss me right? If she says maybe or I don`t know: wanna find out?

I ONCE kiss closed with this.

Just ONCE.

I`m not here for one result in a little while. I`m here for game, I`m here for all the pussy that comes with it. So in that scenario; I need to apply myself NOT to verbalizing my intent never again.

If a kiss close happens, never talk about it before.
If a lay happens, don`t you dare saying let`s go to my place, or get in the cab with me, let`s head to somewhere else.

Why would I pressure the girl so much? No need for her to hear that kind of stuff, nor for me to be tense about it.

So as easy as it may sound for you, this change in my night outs to me means a lot of work. Because I`ve been doing this thing of verbalising my intentions for my whole life. The few girls that ended up with me heard it and I thought it worked! But that was bullshit, they just put up with that in order to fuck me.

Women from my past basically fucked me, only a few things I did well in those interactions. Tons of my doing was bullshit.

Please share any thoughts on how to change a life long habit that`s ruining my your game.

Hey man I read some of your posts. Seems like you have been having some specific problems. For one I highly recommend reading Mark Manson's book Models.

Before you dive into PUA, you have to have an ultimate goal of what you are striving for. All of your intentions will point towards this goal. If your goal is to get the most pussy possible, the girls you interact with will subconsciously see this subtext because you will put out that vibe. That is fine if you meet girls who also want to get as much dick as possible, but if you are looking for more meaningful connections it won't work.

I also suggest treating PUA as a process of overall self improvement. Read more books, work out more, listen to different kinds of music. The only nightly goal you should have when you go out is to have the best time possible. Getting laid is a nice side effect of this process. Seeking out pussy is a paradox. The harder you try the harder it will be to get it. When you stop desperately doing whatever it takes to get it, girls will start to be drawn to you just being an interesting and social guy.

If you have any specific questions about sticking points hit me up.

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Game doesn't exist.

Hey bond, I was thinking over what you've just written. You and I both like what Kasabi has to say, and what I've got from it seems to be: you never ask for anything, you never TELL. You do, and you act out. I think when you ask for something it shows uncertainty and you're looking for acceptance in acting out your own thoughts, essentially asking "I want to do this, is this ok?". At least that's how I see it. Hell when you cold approach a woman in a bar, she knows you're there to try and kiss and to try and fuck her eventually.

I think this whole pick-up malarky is all about being fun and having a good time. How can you elicit a positive emotional response from that girl, how can you make her smile and have a good time with you (what are your strengths?)? Forget about kissing, forget about sex, it becomes natural when you make her smile and you make her laugh first, those things become part of the process.... Ironically the only way to get better at those things is going for the kiss and trying to pursue sex.

Of course getting yourself together internally and creating specific goals to progress yourself whether that's education/career, finances, fitness; they will all certainly help. Being specific = knowing yourself deep down.

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My Journal is thoughts on life game and approaches: artful-roger-journal-vt148980.html

This applyies like hell: toke me one night to repeat the entire process.
After a beer chilling with my friends at a bar yesterday, I noticed a cutie sitting by herself with a bored face checking us out. At one point I thought she was checking me, so I decided to go in.

And what are the words outta my mouth? How are you? I noticed you from back there and thought you were a cutie. Wanna give me your cell number so we can arrange a meeting?
Girl: I have a boyfriend.

Classic bullshit, but I toke it.

Of course, this was my first set, I don`t expect to be brad pitt on my first set; but hell I`m sure I can come up with something better than that.

Personally I think you went for the close too early there Bond, how did you know you even liked her? Looks aside she could have been a complete asshole, give her 20 minutes of your time to see if she's actually worth seeing again. Remember what Kasabi said; stop living your life like you're in a fast food restaurant.

On a side note, it's good that you opened and you weren't scared to be rejected in front of friends. Your opener could've worked if you ditched the "give me your number part" at least until later on. But. . . also give yourself the time to reconsider your actions, what other opener could you have used which would have got you a conversation, you know something non-intrusive but shows interest. Use your journal constructively, give yourself pointers or what you could have done better.

_________________
My Journal is thoughts on life game and approaches: artful-roger-journal-vt148980.html

About damn time I made another entry here.

How you all doing? Fine? Excellent, now we can move on =)

Well, I had a few things running in my life and I won`t bore you with details; just that you should know I`m having some good conversations with a girl at my class, that ended up with something among the lines: we should go out for a beer and talk.

I won`t get much into that until I did it, because there`s no point on masturbate mentally about it. She seems interested, I seem interested. That`s all we have for now.

On the other hand, I just came back from a nice date with a girl I already knew.

Things you need to know about her:
1. I already fucked her like 2 years ago
2. We met about two months ago, came to my place, wouldn`t even let me kiss her.
3. I told her to fuck off after that.

With all being said, I managed to convince her after meeting at mcdonalds to show me some excercises about a specific exam I had at law school (she`s already a lawyer), I convinced her to meet some other time, that I had a great one having breakfast with her; we should repeat.

She agreed and today it was awesome. I was paying more attention to her than to me, this is a huge one. Stop going out being so self aware, pay more attention to her, the highlights she gives you.

We ended up talking about the shitty sex we had back then, the shitty conversations we had; and in general ended up laughing about it all. She told me she likes our dynamic simply because she can say to me whatever is on her mind, no need for with hold anything, made fun about it.

Hard kino, hugs, kiss on cheeks, little bite on the neck both from me and her, but no kiss.

Now I understand she`s "taking it slow", or at least this is her concept of taking it slow. We are meeting again on thursday.

Goals:

1. Kino scalate more heavy with the girl in class, I need to arrange a meeting with her asap; possibly tomorrow night at the Sain Patrick`s party.
2. Kiss close this girl from 2 years ago and scalate asap towards sex. I know she wants it, but she`s never going to tell me. So I have to figure out logistics in order to bring her back to my place after the k-close and lay her on my bed. Simple as that.
3. More important than these two girls, is to keep on practicing this in my life. I gave little to no time to women in my life. I had apathy trying to convince myself that I didn`t care. BULLSHIT, I do and a lot. So get this part handled, go out more with girls. Expand my social circle. Lawschool is the perfect place for that.
4. Been reading Models by Mark Manson, and today I finally could try out the expose yourself out there part, I was vulnerable talking about how shitty I was in bed, about some negs the girl gave me to see if I reacted poorly.
By being vulnerable I`m showing more inner strenght than I ever did, so this is the path. Point being: to practice more self exposure, being more like myself. Today this gave me a nanosecond in wich the girl almost kissed me, bitting her lips not to.

Life is good gentlemen, go out and enjoy it as hard as you can.