Hello,

this is my first post

I met this girl recently in college. I noticed her before (she's very pretty) but never spoke to her. We have one course we both follow, and I always sit next to her and make exercises with her. She seems really great, but I'm not really sure what she thinks about me. I invited her a couple of times for things directly after class (things like getting a coffee), she usually agrees to go, and we have a nice conversation going, but none of us is really flirting (and besides, she never asks me do something together). I'm a bit of a shy guy, and not used to (nor good at) flirting. The only times I flirt is when I go out (and that's probably because of the alcohol...).

Anyway, I want to take a chance with this girl, but I have no idea how to escalate or how to show I'm relation material. To make things worse, I'm going to study abroad for a half year in about a month.

I don't know what to do, any advice is welcome.

You have to make it crystal clear to her what your intentions are. Use verbal cues, as well as nonverbal cues. Tell her you're interested, escalate by kino. Right now, you're playing the part of a platonic friend.

Next time you get coffee, sit next to her instead of sitting across the table from her. 1) This gets you closer to her, making it easy to escalate kino, and 2) The table doesn't serve as a barrier.

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I actually sat right next to her when we did get coffee, but I didn't escalate much. I did gave her a hug at the end, but it felt kinda awkward. Hugging and making physical contact isn't hard when I've drunk a few, but with someone I like it's hard.

Maintain good eye contact when you talk to her. Look away or look distracted when she says something. Just touch her on her arm, hip, or face and say something like,

"You're a dork!"
or
"Ah, whatever."

Try to be comfortable about it. In all likelihood right now she might not be that into you. You haven't been signaling to her that you're interested romantically. Just try flirting and see where it goes.

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-Slavoj Zizek

This sounds like friendzone to me. Because you always sit next to her and make exercises together that complicates things in terms of escalating. You can do two things:

(i) Since you've established some regular contact you can arrange a "date" **on the day** and just make it an experience for her (i.e. move locations and do cool stuff). I don't think it would work to ask her for out for a date since she'll probably think of you as "just a friend". She needs to see you in a different light.

(ii) If you're really serious about her, retreat. Be the slightly uninterested bad boy who uses her for his exercises. It's funny how chicks will never really blame you for using them in that sense, it will just make them see you as a dominant person who is in the lead. You have a great exchange coming up, which will make you interesting when you come back. Have some juicy stories ready when you come back from your time abroad and this will give you a temporary alpha position. Use this with her to create attraction.

Thing is, I'm not sure if we'll see eachother again after the exchange. I know her for about a month when I go abroad, then I'm studying there for six months, and when I go back I'm finished with my study. Hard to say if we'll keep in contact...

whoa, you barely know her! how can you already decide you want a relationship with her? slow down man.

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Well, I explained the situation in the OP, I just met her, but the contact is good (but there's little or no sexual tension). I personally think it would be weirder if I've known the girl for years and then start chasing her.

As for staying in contact, I made really good friends on uni, which I didn't speak to for years after they left the uni. So me wondering if we'd stay in touch doesn't say that much.