Ethics of sleeping with a girl with a serious boyfriend



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PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2013 4:52 pm 
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Ok, so, last weekend (not this past one, but the one before), my buddy, me, and my buddy's FWB/wingwoman were all out at a local bar.

We're talking to people, making friends, etc, etc

Anyway, at one point, we sit down at a random table with three girls.

I sit next to one girl and we're instantly making a connection. My friends leave, her friends leave, and we start getting closer, and start making out.

She stops and says, "Wait! What are you doing! We can't do this, I have a boyfriend."

At first I just shrugged my shoulders like whatever. Then she's like, "And we just bought a house together!" which sorta made me go "shit."

Anyway, we're still feeling a vibe, we're kissing a bit and being like "No, we can't do this!" but there was like intense chemistry. I almost pulled her to my car. At one point she said, "Well, maybe I can cheat a little..." - then her friend came and yelled at me, and was like, "SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND".

Anyway, me and the girl are texting like immediately after that, she finds me on Facebook, invites me to her birthday party. I go, under the auspices that she is going to hook me up with her single friends so that I'm less wanting to fuck her.

During the evening I'm very alpha and social. One of the cutest girls at the party (who also is dating someone, who I befriended and offered to put in a good word for him at the company I work for) is flirting with me like crazy in front of everyone, including touching me.

It's turning on the first girl, who writes a card for me saying, "You're weird." on it.


So she's CLEARLY super down. Like this girl absolutely is like, "Yes, this is a man and I want to fuck him IMMEDIATELY" - but she's got a serious situation. It seems sorta douchey to fuck her in this case, even if we had strong instant chemistry.

Should I go through with it? Walk away? I wouldn't be trying to get her to leave her boyfriend.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2013 6:33 pm 
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My personal feeling is this is on her - she's completely condoning what you're doing, regardless of how serious she is with this guy.

"Maybe I can cheat a little"???

I'd go for it, personally...


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2013 9:02 pm 
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Clearly... if she is willing to say "I guess I can cheat a little" ....her boyfriend isn't fucking her correctly... So you should :)

I say go for it!


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2013 9:06 pm 
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The way I usually look at these situations is ... if my girlfriend were the girl and she was doing this, would some other guy not take advantage,especially if they don't even know me? Doubtful. So why should I not take advantage?

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2013 9:13 pm 
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Girl's don't need much of an excuse to cheat. Go for it, she encouraged it. It takes two to tango, youre not forcing her to do anything. Reason why she said "wait I have a boyfriend' is classic anti slut defence. If you did fuck her and maybe starting dating her if she dumps her boyfriend, she wouldn't want want you to think "hey, wait a minute, this girl jumped straight into bed with me. What's stopping her from doing the same thing to me now?"

Girl's who are fucked good and hard are less likely to cheat. Fact.


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PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2013 11:30 pm 
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The way I see this particular situation is that the girl is obviously open to cheating. Within one evening, she's willing to kiss a random stranger and strongly hint that she'd cheat on her boyfriend. Now, whilst I'm sure your game is great and you're a good looking guy and all that, her behaviour here suggests to me that she would be open to cheating on her boyfriend with quite a few guys. So if she's likely to cheat anyway, then it may as well be you getting the good times out of it rather than the next half decent looking guy with tight game she meets in a club.

The only time I think it is "wrong" to go after a girl in a long term relationship is if it's something a lot slower where she develops feelings for you over a long time and it is you alone she is falling for. Ie; if you work with someone who has been married 20 years and has got 3 kids, she has never cheated before and doesn't even flirt with other guys, but she has known you for 5 years and she would only even dream of cheating on her husband with you and you alone - then that would be a situation I'd stay away from. But if she's the sort of girl who clearly would cheat with any number of half decent guys she meets in a club, then I personally don't have any scruples about sleeping with her.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 1:19 am 
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Bad Karma.

Easy to do, and it wouldn't be your fault. She's just a cheater and she's going to find some dick SOMEWHERE, so I can understand the perspective that it might be yours.

But think about this:

Years from now, if you have a serious girlfriend and move in together, and she goes out some night to a party...what do you think the odds are that you'll forget about what's happening right now, and not lose your mind with paranoia?

Bad Karma. I've done worse but these things have a way of coming back to you.

I'd turn her down respectfully, so you stay in her good graces.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 1:28 am 
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Fuck karma. Did you trick her into kissing you? Did you make her find you on FB? Did you force anything with her?

If you didn't it's all on her. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Seriously, what do you expect? If it wasn't you it would have been someone else. That's the fact of the matter. It's not on you, man. No bad karma coming your way. If the boyfriend finds out he should be pissed with her and count his blessings he found out she was a cheap slut earlier rather than later(With kids and all that shit). Hell, should have happened before they bought the house!

Fact is some people will cheat and some people won't. I don't buy this "An MPUA will fuck your girlfriend no matter what!" because it's bullshit. An MPUA or a PUA or any guy lucky enough can fuck someones girlfriend if she's just a slapper in general or allows herself to be put in those positions. Fact is most women who are out and dressed up want attention and will get carried away, they like that lifestyle and that's why they go out as often as they do. For the women who either never go out or only go out to nightclubs every now and then to be with friends they're the types who you won't fuck if they have boyfriends.

It's totally on the chick.

1. Told you she had a boyfriend AFTER you kissed her.
2. Said "Maybe I can cheat a "little" AFTER you kissed her and were about to do shit with her in her car... Yeah... She was really a trustworthy girlfriend to begin with.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 1:35 am 
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Fuck karma. Did you trick her into kissing you? Did you make her find you on FB? Did you force anything with her?

If you didn't it's all on her. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Seriously, what do you expect? If it wasn't you it would have been someone else. That's the fact of the matter. It's not on you, man. No bad karma coming your way. If the boyfriend finds out he should be pissed with her and count his blessings he found out she was a cheap slut earlier rather than later(With kids and all that shit). Hell, should have happened before they bought the house!

Fact is some people will cheat and some people won't. I don't buy this "An MPUA will fuck your girlfriend no matter what!" because it's bullshit. An MPUA or a PUA or any guy lucky enough can fuck someones girlfriend if she's just a slapper in general or allows herself to be put in those positions. Fact is most women who are out and dressed up want attention and will get carried away, they like that lifestyle and that's why they go out as often as they do. For the women who either never go out or only go out to nightclubs every now and then to be with friends they're the types who you won't fuck if they have boyfriends.

It's totally on the chick.

1. Told you she had a boyfriend AFTER you kissed her.
2. Said "Maybe I can cheat a "little" AFTER you kissed her and were about to do shit with her in her car... Yeah... She was really a trustworthy girlfriend to begin with.
Wrong. Just as Karma eternally haunts all the cheating slutbags, who ten years later find themselves wondering Where Did All The Good Men Go, it will just as surely come back to bite you later. That's how it works.

It doesn't matter if she's coming on to you. Show some self-control and respect for the guy she's cheating on, and maybe some guy won't fuck your girlfriend later in turn.

You can blame her for being a cheating slut all you want, but you can't blame her for putting your dick in her. That's YOUR choice.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 1:42 am 
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Quote:
Quote:
Fuck karma. Did you trick her into kissing you? Did you make her find you on FB? Did you force anything with her?

If you didn't it's all on her. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Seriously, what do you expect? If it wasn't you it would have been someone else. That's the fact of the matter. It's not on you, man. No bad karma coming your way. If the boyfriend finds out he should be pissed with her and count his blessings he found out she was a cheap slut earlier rather than later(With kids and all that shit). Hell, should have happened before they bought the house!

Fact is some people will cheat and some people won't. I don't buy this "An MPUA will fuck your girlfriend no matter what!" because it's bullshit. An MPUA or a PUA or any guy lucky enough can fuck someones girlfriend if she's just a slapper in general or allows herself to be put in those positions. Fact is most women who are out and dressed up want attention and will get carried away, they like that lifestyle and that's why they go out as often as they do. For the women who either never go out or only go out to nightclubs every now and then to be with friends they're the types who you won't fuck if they have boyfriends.

It's totally on the chick.

1. Told you she had a boyfriend AFTER you kissed her.
2. Said "Maybe I can cheat a "little" AFTER you kissed her and were about to do shit with her in her car... Yeah... She was really a trustworthy girlfriend to begin with.
Wrong. Just as Karma eternally haunts all the cheating slutbags, who ten years later find themselves wondering Where Did All The Good Men Go, it will just as surely come back to bite you later. That's how it works.

It doesn't matter if she's coming on to you. Show some self-control and respect for the guy she's cheating on, and maybe some guy won't fuck your girlfriend later in turn.

You can blame her for being a cheating slut all you want, but you can't blame her for putting your dick in her. That's YOUR choice.
Karma isn't fact, it's all up in the air bullshit. I could say I stepped on a roach yesterday but banged my toe today, "that's karma" but the fact is I stood on a roach and carelessly banged my toe either while drunk or purely by accident, nonetheless, completely my own fault and not mystical powers guiding me.

Karma is generally a healthy perception of things: Treat people with love and respect and they too shall treat you the same. Give and receive. Sure, in social dynamics it pays off in some aspects of life but to get deep down and apply it as mystical force is absurd and far fetched. You would have to believe in magic.

Guy chooses to fuck a slut. Guy eventually gets with a slut who cheats on him. Karma or just an event that was bound to happen?


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 1:44 am 
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Fuck karma. Did you trick her into kissing you? Did you make her find you on FB? Did you force anything with her?

If you didn't it's all on her. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Seriously, what do you expect? If it wasn't you it would have been someone else. That's the fact of the matter. It's not on you, man. No bad karma coming your way. If the boyfriend finds out he should be pissed with her and count his blessings he found out she was a cheap slut earlier rather than later(With kids and all that shit). Hell, should have happened before they bought the house!

Fact is some people will cheat and some people won't. I don't buy this "An MPUA will fuck your girlfriend no matter what!" because it's bullshit. An MPUA or a PUA or any guy lucky enough can fuck someones girlfriend if she's just a slapper in general or allows herself to be put in those positions. Fact is most women who are out and dressed up want attention and will get carried away, they like that lifestyle and that's why they go out as often as they do. For the women who either never go out or only go out to nightclubs every now and then to be with friends they're the types who you won't fuck if they have boyfriends.

It's totally on the chick.

1. Told you she had a boyfriend AFTER you kissed her.
2. Said "Maybe I can cheat a "little" AFTER you kissed her and were about to do shit with her in her car... Yeah... She was really a trustworthy girlfriend to begin with.
Wrong. Just as Karma eternally haunts all the cheating slutbags, who ten years later find themselves wondering Where Did All The Good Men Go, it will just as surely come back to bite you later. That's how it works.

It doesn't matter if she's coming on to you. Show some self-control and respect for the guy she's cheating on, and maybe some guy won't fuck your girlfriend later in turn.

You can blame her for being a cheating slut all you want, but you can't blame her for putting your dick in her. That's YOUR choice.
Karma isn't fact, it's all up in the air bullshit. I could say I stepped on a roach yesterday but banged my toe today, "that's karma" but the fact is I stood on a roach and carelessly banged my toe either while drunk or purely by accident, nonetheless, completely my own fault and not mystical powers guiding me.

Karma is generally a healthy perception of things: Treat people with love and respect and they too shall treat you the same. Give and receive. Sure, in social dynamics it pays off in some aspects of life but to get deep down and apply it to mystical things is absurd and far fetched. You would have to believe in magic.

Guy chooses to fuck a slut. Guy eventually gets with a slut who cheats on him. Karma or just an event that was bound to happen?
You can't ever know whether something is bound to happen, so why risk getting hurt later just for some pussy? It's dumb. It makes more sense to me to treat people the way you want to be treated. You don't want a girl to cheat on you someday? Then don't fuck other guys' girlfriends. Simple really.

And even if your girl never cheats on you, you'll ALWAYS expect her to or wonder when it's going to happen, because you will have taken part in the very act you fear.

Make your own choice, I've made mine.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 1:52 am 
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You can't ever know whether something is bound to happen, so why risk getting hurt later just for some pussy? It's dumb. It makes more sense to me to treat people the way you want to be treated. You don't want a girl to cheat on you someday? Then don't fuck other guys' girlfriends. Simple really.

And even if your girl never cheats on you, you'll ALWAYS expect her to or wonder when it's going to happen, because you will have taken part in the very act you fear.

Make your own choice, I've made mine.
If you don't want a girl to cheat on you make sure you don't get with a girl who will cheat on you. Don't jump into a relationship with anyone just because it seems like the thing to do. Keep an eye out for the tell tale signs of a girl who could potentially allow herself to be in compromising situations(#1 big issue) and the even bigger tell tale signs of her being an absolute mess when she's out and what she's like in general. It's simple dude and it's not karma.

A lot of guys will get into relationships even though there are red flags and sometimes even sirens blaring. Why? Because the girl is hot and as needy as we naturally are she will fill that neediness to an extent. Our emotions will override our logic. We do it all the time and we've only ourselves to blame. A woman won't just randomly cheat on you because Karma made her do it. She'll cheat on you if she's a cheater in general and you got with her choosing to ignore the warning signs.

The only reason you have to fear your girlfriend cheating on you is if you think she's that kind of person anyway or you're an AFC who thinks so lowly of himself that he's lucky to be getting pussy, let alone the pussy he has. If you're content with yourself and you chose right you've nothing to worry about. If you do worry about it you're just paranoid and if you're paranoid you're not content with yourself and you will drive her away.

Ever hear of self fulfilling prophecy? You fear something the most and keep on guard for it, expecting it to happen until it happens. You essentially force the situation through your own actions. Fearful your girlfriend will cheat on you or break up with you? You'll force it out subtly.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 4:26 am 
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Do you really need our advice, or just want to brag about it? Either you are ok with it, or you aren't. Do you really need other people's opinions to decide what you should do or not? If you have to ask, you obviously aren't that ok with it...


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 10:49 am 
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Meh.... she's not married so who cares? Let him worry about the house.... and if he put her name on the house then he's just a dumbass. Not your problem. She's gonna suck on somebody elses penis anyway so why not yours?

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 4:58 pm 
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This is immoral.

When a girl wants a good fuck, give it to her. It's good for your karma, unless you know her boyfriend personally. As PUAs, we should keep our values, principles and morality intact.

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