Exactly. But such mindset might only help you get the easy one who was and will be - easy for everyone else - or create this false idea that women who won't let you treat them like targets are somehow not normal. OR, land you a girlfriend who you picked at the bar for ONS, and then you'll have a problem if you actually fall for her.

One can argue that whatever kind of woman you end up with, it all depends on strength of your game, but is it only me who sees a problem with girlfriend's need to be GAMED HARD all the fucking time, in a relationship?

You don't need to game your girlfriend in your relationship. In fact, you must not game your girlfriend. It's stupid. You're not trying to pick her up anymore. You want to be with her, in a deeper way, so trust, comfort, and communication becomes a bigger issue, than when you're just gaming a girl. Also, attraction works a bit differently. She expects sexual, confident, challenging behaviour. As long as you keep that, there's not really going to be a problem with attraction, but as soon as you drop it, the problems will come.

And this is basically the two kinds of problems that a relationship can have.

The first one is that you don't communicate well enough, and you need to work on that. This is insanely common. Hard to spot, but easy to fix with mature behaviour.

The second one is that you let go, and no longer have an attractive agenda. This is somewhat easier to spot(usually the main symptom is lack of sex), but a lot harder to fix.

But as you can see, here we have these problems, but you don't game your girlfriend to fix them. For the first one you simply express your problems and feelings, and mutually figure out a way with compromises how can you make it work. No gaming detected here. In the seconnd one you basically change yourself back to the person, who once seduced her. So it has little to do with gaming her again, it's more about getting your shit together.

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Yeah, but, if you read my post on previous page, you'll see that I have impression like she games me, naturally, even though its her first relationship ever. I gave example of what feels as she's soft nexting me lately when she thinks I'm attacking her(while I'm not and I explained its just talk), though we would find common ground in the end. She claims to feel 'insecure' in such situations.

The other thing is, I feel she requires me to have 40% relationship frame, and 60% alpha frame, despite her claiming she doesn't dig jerks(no woman will be even aware). By this I mean, she jokes a lot, can be witty, doesn't act needy AT ALL, and sometimes messes with my confidence(never stopped commenting "hot celebrities" or hinting what characteristics are sexy without relating them to me directly), and I hate to banter or be paranoid if she tests me. I don't generally believe in "shit tests", they are mechanism in the pick-up, but it all comes down to respect later on and if girlfriend shit tests you after 9 months, then its a question why? Girls who don't want to loose you, don't do that.

Both impressions might be wrong, and this is maybe her personality. I can't know for sure.

And when it comes to sex, its a little bit lacking by my standards, I don't get how can she be satisfied with once a week, despite dialogue where we talked about frequency, something along these lines:
Me: I think sex every day would be too much (Here I lie to test the territory)
Her: (actually changes tone to exciting and says contrary, which I didn't expect)
Her: but it depends on situation and how much private time can be managed for that.

This talk was actually brought by me after I started slowly escalating with my hand down her back, when we were on bed watching TV. After a while she turns around and goes "what the fuck are you doing?".
Me: "well, I'm turned on"
Her: "I see that"

Then I just walked out, ignored her, couldn't hide my irritation, and few hours later I had to speak up when she detected my reaction, and we did have sex, but back then and to this day she claims she didn't get my signal/move (as she's inexperienced with men). Which is hard to believe. I get fucking horny if girlfriend is lying down in shorts in my bed, and I'm not understanding this: don't they? Or she's not purely physically attracted to me, so i have to use contextual escalation properly. I wouldn't say she's just more inhibited
than experienced girls, because she used to just go and want to give me blowjob, in initial RS stage.


And then I'm wondering why we don't have sex always upon private meeting, which isn't to often, I'm busy during week, she got used to 1 or 2 intimate dates per week. Or when I bring some sexual ideas, she'll respond great, but still leave me to bring or insist into reality.

I know sex comes down a bit in longer relationship, but it all gets to me more WHEN I THINK ABOUT HER FIRST SEXUAL EXPERIENCE in PAST. So, again, it does matter.

Women are going to test you until the end of your life or your relationship. I have never come across a girlfriend, who regardless of the time passed, didn't throw in some shit tests from time to time. This is a mechanism to proove you're still the guy whom she once fell in love with. Her talking about hot actors can not even be considered a shit test, as long as you don't think it is.
So that means she's an independent woman who's confident in her reality and I just don't understand why that bothers you...
^This is not normal. I only meet with my girlfriend on weekends and even then, if I'd have to put an avarage I'd say 4 times out of 5 days we spend together at least. This clearly shows that you have attraction issues. And it is mainly because of this:
Wrong answer, and wrong behaviour you're doing here. She didn't quite reject you, and you behaved like she did. Also, you were saying "I'm turned on" when the mood was not appropriate for it. I see this issue all the time. Guys complain about their girls are "not in the mood" so much, but they fail to realize, that if they don't GET her in the mood, then sooner or later, it won't just happen naturally. You need to keep the sex exciting for her, and just rubbing her back is not going to do it. Have you actually tried, for example, to get home, drop your stuff in the door-way, grab her, put her against the wall and just do her? Try it, and do it without a second of hesitation and see if she rejects that... I fucking doubt it. Also, I'd say she's just plain stupid if she won't get the hint from that, lol. And as I read more... there's just proof in what you have written:
Yeah, in the initial RS stage. Because back then everything was exciting for her about you, but now you need to bring some variety into the bedroom.
It does, but not to once a week. That's like "married for 10 years" stage.
Have you actually told her how good it would feel for you, and how badly these things would turn you on, or just that you'd like them? Because, if you're just bringing up ideas, you won't get her motivated as long as she isn't convinced that this is something that she should be doing as a good girlfriend. Because good girlfriends make their partner happy, even the most anti-social, never had a boyfriend girl, with the exception of sadists, sociopaths and other personality disorders, WILL know that's a good girlfriend's job. So if say, you tell your girlfriend something like this:

"Baby you know I was having a dream last night and it was so intense. I got home, and without a word you grabbed my hair, started kissing me, and...(start some explicit details here, but leave out some for curiousity reasons) And it turned me on to the point that I had to wash my sheets because I sweated so much last night. I would really love if you made this dream come true from time to time, out of surprise"

She probably won't do it the next time you meet, to really make you surprised(at least, that's what my girlfriends all did. they waited till the 3rd-5th meeting with it), but as long as your frame on the LOVER-PROVIDER scale has not crossed the border(meaning you're more like a provider than a lover), she should approve, and do it for you.

Learn to properly communicate your needs with your girlfriend.

"I'd like this, I wouldn't like that"--->not good

"This would make me feel good, that would make me feel bad"--->acceptable

"This would make me feel this way, that would make me feel that way"-->good

Peace,

In$tinct

_________________
"Bros before hoes"

Relationship guide: extended-relationship-guide-vt170687.html

http://wayoftheplayer.com/become-a-player/instinct

Stphen B, please just make a thread with your gf problems (attraction issues, her past, sex life etc) instead of hijacking the OPs thread. The OP couldnt get past something about his gf, left the relationship and moved on. He didn't take whatever he could get and then come here to pop into other threads to vent his issues from trying to save a bad relationship. You obviously have alot of issues with your gf internally; you write alot about your situation. If a relationship is so complicated and has you thinking so much, its not worth it. You refuse to just accept that. At least make a thread where you can talk about your situation in one place if you're not just trolling or something.

Done.

I don't see what the big deal is... a girl's sexual past is not a reason to leave her... might be a good reason not to go out with her in the first place. In the future, you might want to get that information before having sex with her.

When you're bedding down and about to have sex for the first time, you just ask her about her sexual past, you know, how many guys she's slept with, if she's ever cheated on anyone, if she's been in any threesomes, etc. It's really pretty basic stuff....

This is probably the DUMBEST thing I've seen posted on this thread. You can screen the girl but to come out and ask her how many guys she's been with...? Sounds pretty insecure.

I don't understand why people are still even commenting on this thread. OP, you've got a girl who's a freak. She likes to fuck and get fucked. Either take it or leave it. If you want a girl who's a freak and is going to be cool with threesomes and shit if/when you decide that is something you want... there's your girl. If not, then leave.

Like I originally said...

If you want a girl who's a FREAK, you've got to accept the fact that you aren't the only guy she's ever gotten freaky for.

The guy took charge, didn't want it on his head so he dumped her. Good for him. Can we close this?

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Sluts: Great fuckbuddies. Threesome potential. More likely to be down with open relationships.

Also: Terrible monogamy candidates. Awful girlfriends and even worse wives. Cheating and "not feeling fulfilled in the relationship" is nearly 100% guaranteed down the line.

This is not "slut-shaming," it's reason.

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Okay dude. Heres the first issue. Youre acting like she did something wrong. She didnt. She experimented sexually and she may have made some mistakes but whatever... who doesnt. The alpha thing to do would have been to stop her and say. 'You dont have to tell me about your past babe. It doesnt matter.' Because honestly... it doesnt. If she cheats you leave. Thats it. The issue here is that you think you're better than that. My gf had a devils threesome when she was like 14 or something. Do I care? No. It came up by mistake I was talking about 3 somes and she thought I knew. I told her to not worry about it. That I didnt need to know... because I dont. If youre not okay with it leave but dont sit here and call her a slut. If youre alpha and you wanna game hot girls expect some to have a history. A real alpha knows that his girl wony ever cheat because she wont find better. No matter what her past I know that if I run tight game my gf will not cheat. Be confident. You're spending all this time freaking out about something that happened over 6 years ago? Seriously man? You probably should leave cause she will cheat on you when you act that beta. Or just leave. And any other girl youre with now youre gonna worry about their past. If you wanna be successful with women you have to accept the philosphy thay the past is completely irrelevant.

Hijo