Hello I met a girl 3 weeks ago that was divorced recently end of May. She was only married for 1 year and dated the guy for 1 year. She had a matrimonial home which they sold 2 weeks ago. No kids.

This girl is super smart with multiple degrees and 30 years old and of course beautiful. I am 37 successful entrepreneur.

I have gone on 5 dates with her so far. 1st date she came to my home for some wine. ( lives in same condo )

4th date my condo again - we didn't have sex but I am pretty sure I could have but did everything else. Lots of kissing and had her bra off, feeling each other, my shirt was off. Ya i know should have had sex.

Other dates were - bike riding, picnic and a place for a casual dinner.

Ok so long story short. Each time I see her she acts like we are 100% a couple. Lots of kissing and feeling and talking about sex and tension is high and deep conversations and good laughs and fun. But she tells me she is trying not to like anyone. She is dating other guys and tells me this. She goes out of her way to tell me by even walking over to me outside and saying " This is my friend Jason " well now she has been out with Jason twice. She messages me everyday, we message a lot. Everything is playful and exactly like how I have been in relationships.

All her actions say she is totally into me. All her words tell me I am not looking for a relationship, I can't right now, I have been through a lot.

I have another date with her tomorrow. But I am thinking of cancelling. This girl is taking up to much of my mind share. To much so that I can't sleep at night. She is dating other guys ( at least one/ Jason ) which she said is a friend from work. Introduces him to me as a friend and once to my buddy she said the same this is Jason my friend. But I'm sure she is saying the same of me " friend ".

She has gone out of her way to tell me she is dating. But then says, how do I let them down easy? I told her I don't care about your dates and asked why do you feel the need to tell me. She said oh so sorry I won't do that anymore and hasn't since.

I like her a lot. She is perfect. But I can't handle these games. What should I do?

More information.

- I dropped off some sexy booty shorts that I had for a business of mine that trade show booth girls wear for my business. She immediately put them on and showed them off to me. Then later texts me that she was horny and masturbated and burned her muffins and now her face is flush.

- We have talked about what sex we like

- She says to me 3 times " what if I am bad in bed ? "

- She texted me this past Friday night at 2am ( I had a early night so didn't hear it )

- But she goes out on dates with other guys. At least one

- She tells me she's not ready even close for anything serious

- We have gone on dates 2-3 times a week and I see her often as I bump into her a lot as my good friend lives on her same floor.

- we talk everyday text or in person

- no sex yet

- talked to her about my big penis and she is so wanting to see it I can tell but is being good

Feel like some fear of rejection going on here... the fact you had her over your place so many times and still didn't have sex is a problem.. it makes you look insecure in her eyes and you risk getting friendzoned/rejected despite her playing along with your dirty talk. You gotta close asap, that is the best way to make a woman into you and want to see you again.

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http://www.joshsway.com -- dating, online dating, fitness, fashion, and more...

I am not concerned about having sex with her. I am sure that it's next date if the location is right.

What I am concerned about is she's dating other guys and she just got divorced 3 months ago. I don't like to be
with a girl who is actively dating other guys.

It's more work than I am willing to put in the patience and her constant shit tests to see if I am congruent with who I say I am. I feel like I am constantly under the microscope with her and am competing for her when she should be competing for me.

She is teasing the shit out of you dude. She is trying to fuck with you because SHE WANTS YOU TO FUCK HER, but you cant seem to take the hint. Eventually you wont be able to hold yourself back and she will get what she wants.

I usually find if me and the girl haven't had sex by the end of day 3 then it isn't going to happen. Usually (not always) some stuff gets in the way and it screws up.

_________________
http://www.puamethod.com - PUA Method Instructor in Training

http://www.pua.co.uk - The community

hey mate,

somebody is going to have to wake you up. I am sorry, but i am going to go caveman on you, dont take it entirely personally (because many men have done it before you including me).

ok, here comes the first, as a quote:

"Stop being a vagina and fuck her already."

Open your eyes mate. This woman is just out of marriage. Although marriage might only have been for a year, she might have been together with this guy for a longer period. She is free and she is enjoying it. She doesn't care for anything and she wants to enjoy herself. She wants to get fucked over and over again, and good! Memorably fucked. Nothing more, nothing less.

I see guys doing this over and over again. A free, sexual woman, enjoying her time. She looks at you and KABAAM, you fall like freshly washed towel would: soft and fluffy.... COMMON! I should literally walk to your front door and bitchslap you when you open the door.

there is only one way she can more clear about what it is she wants and that would be her totally naked, dripping wet shouting at you that she wants you to fuck her and then leave her alone except if the sex was awesome, then you can come and do it again. But she will never do that, as that would put the stigma of 'slut' on her. You have to understand that, she doesn't want to go 'slutty' far. In her mind, doing the above would make her a slut. And this tears her apart, because she loves sex. She loves a humangous cock and she loves to be ridden like Lucky Luke rides Jolly Jumper. But she will never go as far as telling you that blatently. Because it would make her a slut. Understand this and you many female mannerisms will make sense to you.

Here are the signs again:

- she talks about sex and you big penis
- you touched her titties and she touched yours (hihihi)
- she tells you she is dating other guys
- she shows you... the other guys
- she tells you: i am not looking for somehting serious right now.

She is not playing games with you. She just refuses to tell you in the face that she wants to be torn apart by your big penis. And probably only once. But... if you perform well, great chance that you can go at it again. Perform great and you can shake of comptition at some time.

I must say, i do admit that it is easier to spot as an outsider (so, really, i have been there many times as well, i understand mate), but imagine you as an outsider, looking across the room to your best friend and a woman. What would you say to him if he comes and tells you: maaaaaan, i am so in love with this girl!!

From what i can read, you and her are not on the same frequency. But i am not totally sure if you are being completely honest with yourself. So i suggest you do a bit of soulsearching and think about what it really really is you want with this girl. Do you really want her to be your girlfriend of is it that you truly want to fuck this one multiple times without any obligations... small line, big difference.

So lets wrap this up:

the problem:
- she wants to be free
- she wants to fuck you
- you fall for her
- you think she is playing games but actually she is not.

the solution:
- think what it is you really want: relationship (then let her go) vs a fuckbuddy vs one night stand
- take action so you make your wishes reality. Be a man and go for what you want. If she really is not what you want, then let her be. If you do want her, then go for it. If you want her to be your girlfriend from now on, forget about it, it aint going to happen.
- fuck her anyway.

Hope you are awake now. Again, dont take it entirely personal, because i dont mean it like that, except then for the fact that i am addressing you .

cheerios

PS: beware if you belldoor rings...

_________________
"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you

One thing I've learned...the more sex you have, the more you get attached.
Don't play with her feelings. If you really like her, have sex with her. She'll get attracted at some point.

So yeah...the only solution is sex. Once attached, you can swipe off the competition.

Be a man have sex with her and make it good. Also the same thing she's doing to you, have more options and go out with other girls. Lets her know your not available all the time and you have other options which can only raise your value in her eyes.

raise the buying temperature, she isn't pulling the trigger because you are too predictable and easy, thus your social value is still suspect and so she assumes she has you in the bag. Challenge that assumption and it will likely fall into place. If you keep playing hide the sausage hi-jinx and being like "i'm down for whatever bad behavior you whip up" she has less impetus to seal the deal. Currently you are just her top prospect with no expiration date

Wow LD thanks! No offence taken at all. In fact I really appreciate you taking the time to give such a detailed response.

Alright so what I really want is relationship yes. In the past I would want whatever but I had something tragic happen Dec 2011 where my fiance died in a car crash. ( not looking for sympathy so don't give any ). Since then I only started dating recently with any conviction. I am able to mess around and kiss many girls but have only had sex with 2 girls since she passed. I am building up my " don't care " again since I moved into this hot bed area of Toronto for chicks, it's crazy the amount of girls here. So I am getting close to just going on an all out sex rampage soon. But I haven't put myself over the edge yet.

Here is what I did to this girl... I realized I have been a bit to nice. A bit to predictable and a bit to little a challenge. I have been doing a lot of push pull. But I would say 75% pull and 25% push. I have decided to switch that this weekend to the opposite.

We had a date planned for yesterday. She messages me Sunday morning says how was your night last night?

I said " Top 5 all year " Oh listen something came up for tomorrow and were gonna have to reschedule our date. Don't be mad. "

She said: No problem about tmrw. I'm happy you had a great night! I hope everything is ok.

Then the next night she messages me at 10:36 pm and says Having another awesome night ?

I said: Wonderful.

*** No messages since then. So I am doing a little freeze out right now.

Last week we had two amazing dates where both were very passionate and SHOULD HAVE HAD SEX I KNOW. Then Friday she tells me she just finished masturbating and then Saturday she is on a date with some guy all day. So I was fed up and decided to change things up a bit to make her jealous and guess a bit and make myself a bit unpredictable.

Where to go from here? When do I stop the freeze out ? What type of compliance test should I do ? Should I continue for a full week? Or will she start to forget me? Or should I wait for her to message some more and reach out. I want HER to ask me out on a date and make plans. I want her to work for me.

thoughts?

- I am always going out and do have lots of options.

- I have 2-3 other girls on the go. I go out with a buddy we pick up each night if we are fully wanting to

- I practice in the park talking to girls always ( dog owner in busy dog area )

DETOX75: Did I raise the buying temperature and become more predictable by saying Saturday night was top 5 all year then suddenly blowing her off for our Monday date without explanation?

I am determined to fuck her, I talk to her very dirty. The other day I spanked her two ass cheeks and said to her later damm your ass is to tight I don't even think I'd fit my cock in there. Also told her, next time you come over, wear those booty shorts and no bra, I want easy access and no resistance. I have been very assertive and dominant in the sex talk. But my problem was I was a pussy in the other talk and a wet towel on the floor as she is really everything I want in all categories.

Fear of rejection ends up getting people rejected ....

_________________
http://www.joshsway.com -- dating, online dating, fitness, fashion, and more...

Also she has said to me THREE times.... " What If I am BAD in bed? " Referring to herself.

She told me she likes it more rough and a dominant man in bed.

Is she worried I will expect her to be all fancy

or is she worried I will be bad?

I wouldn't even read into this at all and would have completely ignored it. You had her at your place, keep escalating (keep it respectful obviously).

_________________
http://www.joshsway.com -- dating, online dating, fitness, fashion, and more...