Bah friend zone, comfort or just LMR? What the hell.



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PostPosted: Sun Jun 30, 2013 1:44 am 
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Joined: Sun Jun 16, 2013 3:52 am
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Basically I've been friends with this girl for a few years, but we haven't been buddy buddy friends and if I was to go down a check list of things you do to get put in the friend zone I have done none of them, and she doesn't act like she's friend zoned me.

Now, onto this part. She flirts and flirts with me, but when I went int for the kiss, I got the dreaded cheek turn. (never flirts verbally, she always backs off on the verbal stuff but I think that could just be how she is)

Now, some background info. We we're laying together in bed with our legs across each other fooling around, heavy tickling and stuff like that. I threw a few things down her shirt, she threw some things down my pants, and I figured it was on. I even slapped her ass a few times, and she didnt seem to have a problem with it. I have touched every part of her body and can touch pretty much anything on her face, I even worked my hands through her hair and it didn't bother her. I figured this would have been the deal breaker if it wasn't ok to kiss her.

So I went in for the kiss and then she turned her head and went "unuh" and then was it. She stayed where she was so she didnt back off and acted like nothing happened and kept going with the flirting etc etc. I also saw a "It was weird" text she sent to a friend about it (After that, I was thinking boom, friend zone). I kept fooling around for a little and then did a mini freeze out (which was probably the wrong thing to do), which drove her nuts. Everything died down after that.

She then kicked me out to go somewhere (which i doubt she actually had to go somewhere) and turned the cheek again on an attempted goodbye kiss. She went for the hug though, I didn't initiate.

Now, I've heard of cases where girls turn the cheek 6, 7 times and give in on the 8th (thats probably and extreme case but still). Stop talking to her and wait for her to initiate? Or keep pushing? That is the question.


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:06 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jun 24, 2009 6:43 am
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Why would a freeze out work? The girl's already conflicted about sex and you stopped the arousing stuff that made her want to give in. It doesn't make any sense. Sorry, I'm just on a crusade to end that piece of horse shit advice. I think if you have to try to kiss her 8 times before you break her down and she gives in, you're in a bad place, I've never had to do that. Look, if you're getting the vibe that she's sexually interested in you and she's shutting you down, you are allowed to just flat out ask her what's up. You're getting conflicting messages kind of. Just be prepared for her to say she doesn't think of you that way and don't try to change her mind by arguing. Logic won't work, accept you're in the friend zone. Maybe it will be something totally different though. You've been friends for years, feel free to you know, communicate with her.

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:19 pm 
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Joined: Sun Nov 02, 2008 3:46 pm
Posts: 340
Location: Spain
This sounds almost IDENTICAL to the "situation" I currently find myself in!

I basically got friend-zoned. So I told the girl in question that I already have enough girl-friends and don't need another one. She was surprised and disappointed by my decision to freeze her out, as she basically wanted to have her cake and eat it, which I wasn't ok with!

But I then went AFC and "reneged" on the freeze-out, and have since re-initiated contact with her. This may ultimately prove to be an error on my part, but fuck it! I'm just gonna be "mates" with her, initiate contact occasionally but not often, and then see if I can game her again further down the line! I'm not that bothered whatever happens, so I guess I'll just see how it turns out!

Good luck!


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