Made my move too early and try to fix things up



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stardux
PostPosted: Mon Jul 08, 2013 9:30 pm 
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Hi guys,

Just wanted your opinion on smth: I ended up at a girl's place and made my move probably a little too early before having escalated enough.

We agreed to be just friends and were pretty sincere about it.

Still I'd like your opinion: do you think it's still possible to re-sexualize the relation next times we'll meet and end up being more than friends?
If yes, what would be the best way?

It's gonna be pretty hard as we were serious about this agreement, but I'm sure there's always a way.

Thanks in advance
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RiRi
PostPosted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 1:57 am 
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Not sure about this one.

What makes you think she decided to "just be friends" because you made your move too early?

What are the odds that she just isn't into you?

Here are a few questions:

- Was she attracted to you to begin with?
- How did she react to your advances?
- What were your IOIs that led you to try to escalate?

I think there are a few things to hash out before we can start thinking about changing her frame of mind...how did her mind get there?
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Dj_Red
PostPosted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 5:59 am 
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Personally i HATE getting friend zoned..... however you can use her as a pivot ;) just a thought... but if it were me id tell her something like " im sorry i dont want to be just friends ...i cant pretend that i dont want to take things further with you ... but if your not interested i understand. it was a pleasure meeting you .." simple as that.. and then go find another set ;) HER loss , not yours

I MEAN .. you CAN be friends and MAYBE you can escalate however her frame of mind as she sees you is just a "buddy" or "good friend" .. soo idk

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Mattr1984
PostPosted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 7:17 am 
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Wrong dude, you didn't make the move too early. You got back to her place, no better time. You never go backwards when you make a move. You are either in the same place or forwards, never backwards. She was never going to get with you in the first place.

Harsh but reality sucks. You are friendzoned. The only way to get out is to pick up a bunch of girls in front of her.

Take your hit and move on dude!
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TheFury
PostPosted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 1:28 pm 
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Wrong dude, you didn't make the move too early. You got back to her place, no better time. You never go backwards when you make a move. You are either in the same place or forwards, never backwards. She was never going to get with you in the first place.

Harsh but reality sucks. You are friendzoned. The only way to get out is to pick up a bunch of girls in front of her.

Take your hit and move on dude!
This.

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stardux
PostPosted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 7:47 pm 
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I see a lot of experience in here, you guys really figured out an incredible number of things in spite of the very scarce information provided.

It's clear she wasn't interested enough and it's even clearer my best bet to make her change her mind is to pick some girls in front of her.

Thanks a million for your help!
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Playboi_
PostPosted: Mon Jul 22, 2013 9:29 am 
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Quote:
Personally i HATE getting friend zoned..... however you can use her as a pivot ;) just a thought... but if it were me id tell her something like " im sorry i dont want to be just friends ...i cant pretend that i dont want to take things further with you ... but if your not interested i understand. it was a pleasure meeting you .." simple as that.. and then go find another set ;) HER loss , not yours

I MEAN .. you CAN be friends and MAYBE you can escalate however her frame of mind as she sees you is just a "buddy" or "good friend" .. soo idk
Have to disagree with my man here. Of course you can try again. Reframe buddy. Reframe til you get bored and decide she's lost you. If you go in with the mindset that it was awkward last time, then it will be again this time. Think to yourself, "she must be a scared girl and not know how to accept advances. It's okay, she gets one more shot."

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