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PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2013 9:39 pm 
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Joined: Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:22 am
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Hey guys, I honestly need your opinions on this matter here, and no disrespect but the more experienced the better.

Been in the game for a little while now, and before this turns into a fucking oneitis tale please hear this out. I know the how the game works and I know that if you care too much about a girl you will probably not get her, etc.

So I met this one girl last year in the Summer. I picked her up at a bar and it was on quite quickly. All in all we went on 5 dates together, and I almost got into her pants but didn't manage to in the end. She's an extremely honest girl who values herself, but she is also completely attracted to me and we have probably the best chemistry I have ever had with anyone in my entire fucking life. I don't know if this has happened to anyone here, maybe it's happened multiple times to some people, but she and I get along like no one's business and we're both attracted to each other.

Last year the problem was I was going to London, and she didn't want to have sex because she didn't want to get hurt, etc. And she was clear that we were not having sex. After the final date I said to her in person that we should probably break it off because I am a sexual person. I wanted to be the one to break it off to remain in my own frame, since this was really not going anywhere.

Anyway we kept in touch for almost a year purely via text as I was in London and she in Vienna. In the meantime I had two other girls. However something fucked up happened, and I realized that she and I had such an incredible connection, bla bla...Yeah.

Anyway, today we met up again for the first time in almost a year, and immediately it was that great chemistry and connection again. After a year it relit a spark, and we were very touchy feely, no kissing, but more touchy feely than friends. We had an awesome hangout, I make her laugh and she just makes me feel truly at peace. It's weird.

Anyway, the hangout/date finishes and we go separate ways, and man do I instantly feel a loss. Now you guys know I preach an abundance mentality and always say it will go away if you get other girls, but even after a fucking year I feel the same way with her. And now I'm thinking the only way to close this emptiness I feel when I'm not with her is to either get a definite yes or no. In order to move on with my life I have to get closure. And I turn to you guys to help me out with this situation. I am being completely honest here, you guys can call me out on being a pussy or having oneitis or whatever, but I'm really turning to you with what seems to be a very personal issue here in my life, one of incompletion.

So I decided I'm going for her, because there is at least a chance of me getting her whilst there also being a chance of not getting her.

I believe the main problem for her is she somehow doesn't see a future with us together. She doesn't trust that I will stick around, since I live in London and she here in Vienna, and to be honest I don't know her thoughts about Long Distance. She would be the only one I would ever do it for. I don't know how to play it from here, if at all, but remember I really do need closure in my life here. I feel I need to somehow make my thoughts about a future or long distance indirectly clear to her. To gain her trust in this area.

I am not about to go AFC on her since I know the game well enough not to do that. But I do need to somehow make it clear that I like her and would not mind being with her even over the distance, that I would actually stick around and not play her, but of course I know that abundance is an attractive trait in a man, and not idolizing her is something that has to be done.

Again, any help is appreciated. Look, call me out on whatever shit, really, I'm just being honest here and looking for some advice. Thanks guys.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2013 10:24 pm 
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Joined: Wed Dec 28, 2011 1:00 am
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One-itis is sadly an easy way out to explain these type of situations, it's a word more used then a whore.
PUA in my eyes was meant for more sexual purpose. In this case you have found yourself LT material that offers more then the usual woman can give you. It's normal that you build this connection and if it would be taboo, then this world had no meaning to it.

What i strongly advise you to do, is bring this fact up to her, if you say the chemistry is right, then there's no harm in being honest at all. If it's meant to be, now is the time. The matter of her not believing you, shouldn't be a hindrance, i think words cannot comfort her, and that you shouldn't try to. Your best bet is to comfort her by actions, give her the choice to trust you. Make it clear why you want this relationship, and let the rest be decided by your actions.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 19, 2013 12:17 am 
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Joined: Mon Dec 05, 2011 10:13 pm
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Location: Milano
Hey dude, long time no speak. If I was you, I wouldn't keep this hanging around and in the future having regrets of what it could have been. If you feel that this girl is super special to you and you get along with her a lot I would go for closure. However she acts towards this is going to be good for you, and if she doesn't see anything serious happening between you two then you can at least know that you tried.
Long distance can work if you visit her and she visits you from time to time.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 19, 2013 12:20 am 
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Go for it bro. Closure is where it's at. If it work out then great...if it doesn't at you don't have any regrets.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 26, 2013 7:31 am 
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Joined: Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:22 am
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Location: London
What a roller coaster it's been! Thanks for all the help guys. She came over last night and we had sex. Where this will go from here I truly do not know, but she seems to like me and always talks about future hangouts (she's going to London, and I'll be going there for a week, too). Last time she even talked about me visiting her in Slovakia. If this actually does go somewhere it would be my first real relationship with a girl that I like quite a bit.

As contradicting as this may sound right now, for some reason after sex, and still now, I felt a little more distant towards her. Maybe because I didn't come (she came multiple times I think). I was extremely tired running on 4 hours of sleep, and well, broke my dry spell so the little guy down there had some getting used to do. Next time I see her if we have sex I'll focus on my own enjoyment more, since this time I really focused on making her feel good, which might have not been the best idea, but I was quite nervous throughout the whole thing, or at least outcome dependent.

Anyway, thanks guys for pushing me to pursue her, and I'll keep you updated on how it goes.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 26, 2013 9:01 pm 
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Good job bro I'm glad you finally got there with her. However i hope the distant feeling isn't caused from you finally hitting that and not being interested anymore. But now i feel you two should keep things casual until she brings up the issue of "what are we". Also I hope you can work out that long distance thing that can be kinda rough sometimes. Good luck!

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