Hey

[This is not about getting some girl laid.]

There is a girl (HB7) I know which is living kind of behind a mask.
I know her since about 2-3 years and would consider myself one her closer male friends.
She has a problem with trusting people like you would expect it from a 16yrs old that made some really bad experiences with her ex.
I never ever saw her arguing with people or otherwise emotionally provoked.
She is just that super-nice girl without real emotions.

A few weeks ago I had a serious talk about that with her and it corresponded with what I thought. Which means that there was some event someday that made her very sceptical when it comes to trusting people.
She did not want to tell me what that event was.
Since she did not had a single boyfriend and also no other stuff going on, as long as I know her, I asked her if she thinks that she could still feel love for somebody.
Her answer was "I hope so."

After that talk I felt like I conquered a castle just to stand in front of another inner wall.
I am fine with that but I am also very curious about the personal experiences she made in life.

Now I am asking you how to get her to open that door within the inner wall and let me in.
I don't want her to love me nor I want her to fuck me but I really want to understand whats going on inside her.
The last idea I have is to try to kiss her and jump over that wall by getting intimate but I would not like to pull that string. I would consider her more of "a long term goal".

She will leave to Paris for a year on thursday and will probably visit me on wednesday to say bye. I live 100km from where she lives. I moved away to study a year ago but we have seen quite often when I were home.

Any advice?

She came back for Christmas and we were both in town for family stuff.
We met at a club and it was kind of on. Her girlfriends are always kind of handing her off to me
and we were dancing for a few hours very closely. I am pretty sure she enjoyed it.
She drove a bunch of friends home and then me.
We were standing in front of my house for a few minutes and decided to do something together in the next 2,5 hrs... (It was 7.30 and we both had appointments at 10.00)
We drove to some high tower and tried to watch the raising sun but it was too cloudy.
Then she drove me home and left. (I didn't give her another choice)

After that I had some serious talking with one of her three closest friends...
She told me exactly the same and made a guess what the reason could be.
It was the same guess as the one I made some time ago but it seemed a little to drastic: rape.
The girl I talked to knows her about 2 years longer.

Another friend recently told me that one of our friends tried to get her for some time too.
He also said that I progressed way farer with her than his friend.

I crashed my back-then relation ship by being an asshole to be able to actively pursue her.
I worked long on this and it's starting to pay off. I'm amazed by myself how dedicated I can be.

We recently crossed some borders which basically means we're making out and hanging out a lot.
The problem is still that she is very very secretive about what she thinks and what she wants.
I don't expect this thread to be any helpful in changing that I just wanted to share my story with you.
It's more than 2 years that I'm after her now.

EDIT: I'm writing somewhat of a diary since this first happened (something I wanted to do earlier
when a bunch of weekends in a row were just crazy exciting and full of fun).
I might post certain bits of it here if there is interest. (Wouldn't know why but you never know.)

By talking to her more.

[quote="n2thevoid"]By talking to her more.[/quote]

I'm the person she's talking to more than anyone else (her sister might come close).
While she is the exact opposite I try to be very open about my thinking so she can be
sure that there is no "danger" coming from me. I tell a very consistent story (because it's the truth)
but I can't get her to open up. This might also take a while longer though. It's just a few weeks now.

P is for patience.

Engage her in convo topics that interest her

In vino veritas. In wine there is truth.

Get her some drinks and let her cuddle up to hear your heartbeats. It always works. You don't even have to probe or talk that much. She'll do the talking.

_________________
Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

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