This post might be a little long-winded, but please bare with me.

My main question here is: Is it just me, or do other community members need (or should I say "prefer") to go out with a "sarging mentality" in order to sarge?

Details: Last night I went out with another community member, who is also a friend, with the intention of just hanging out. This was made clear before we went out, when I asked him are we just hanging out or sarging, and he said "just hanging out". (Pls keep in mind even though this person is a community member, he's all talk but I've never seen him done any of the stuff he says.)

We went out and saw a bunch of HB's but I was suffering from AA because I was not in "sarging mode". So, I was just chatting with my friend and walking in the streets of The Big Apple, and we happen to stumble upon Union Square - a prime spot for sarging. Out of nowhere he asks me if I wanted to sarge...I don't know why he asked because we already agreed the night was for hanging out and I knew he wasn't going to do anything. With that in mind, I chickened out and said "no". I felt like a pussy afterwards <sigh>. I made a solemn promise to myself that I'll be serious about this whole PUA stuff, and now I chickened out...so angry at myself.

Anyhow, have anyone of you experienced this in the past (i.e. - chickened out from opportunities due to not being in "sarging mode")?

It's also known as being "in state."

It happens because you are dependent on results. When you go out, just go out to talk and socialize. View each interaction simply for the purpose of the experience.