Hi,

So I was seeing this girl for a few months. 2-3 months ago she ended it claiming she was confused (It seems I was the rebound guy - the other guy lives on a different continent, and she was a bit confused, so I believe her). We ended it very well, but I told her we can't be friends and froze her out.

One month ago, I sent one message with something that was genuinely helpful for her to introduce her to someone for a work opportunity, but nothing else. I just thought It would be the right thing to do.

Today I got a message saying "Was in your neighbourhood today. Thought of you. Hope all is well "

a) Is this just friendly, or do you think she is fishing/interested?
b) What is the best response to this?

Thanks
-G

You'd like her to be interested so you're projecting that.

She's not.

I wouldn't reply.

THIS

So you dont think it's rude to say nothing at all?

She initiated after a month of complete silence? Assuming you guys slept together in the past, I would not blow this off completely. It is potentially worth exploring.

I would respond with something simple: "Hey, long time, how've you been?"

There is little to no downside here.

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http://www.joshsway.com -- dating, online dating, fitness, fashion, and more...

I disagree. She's either seeking attention or wants validation that you're still a little into her (which you are or you wouldn't give a shit and wouldn't have posted here).

Replying to her gives her exactly that.

So what? So the girl gets her "validation" worst case? All he has to do is write a text. If you've slept with someone in the past, you can never rule out the possibility of sleeping with her again. Would I get worked over the girl again or put in any effort beyond a no effort meeting (perhaps even double book it?) No, I wouldn't. But the goal is to get laid, not to "not give girls what they want".

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http://www.joshsway.com -- dating, online dating, fitness, fashion, and more...

Hey, whatever -

The chick isn't into him.

You're needlessly being a patsy by replying.

Your life.

shes not into you dude, she only cares about herself. You dont need someone like that in your life.

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Dream as if you'll live forever, Live as if you'll die today - JD

yeah...she was in the neighborhood, but she didnt visit. she decided just to say "hope is all well".
she doesnt give a fuck about you, its just her way to thank you for the favor you did. answer "thanks"
and never text her again.

i personaly would wite back, saying you should have stopped by i was home all day. Show her what a missed opportunity she had. either way you come out a winner.

You message her saying she should've stopped by you come off needy. If anything you'd say that's alright I haven't been home all day anyways.

I'd to the opposite actually. Tell her you weren't home, so it wouldn't have mattered anyway. Naturally, she'll wonder where you were and the ball is rolling...

Sure, these are bread crumbs and yes, she's seeking validation. How does that make her any different from any woman out there? Everything they do is a calculated attempt to garner more of it. The question is: is it worth validating her to get what you want?

It's really that simple. Do you want to have sex with her again? If you can set emotions aside and that's what you really want, then go for it. So long as it isn't your only source of pussy.

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"Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"

I tend to agree w/Dr. Jones. AS LONG AS the OP does not get worked up over this girl again. OP, you should be treating any interaction with this girl as a "free option" The second you are putting in any sort of substantial effort (for example, canceling on another girl to maybe hang out w/this one etc.) it is not worth it per what many posted here that she probably isn't interested. However, I still completely disagree that firing off a text really hurts you in anyway. It takes what, literally 3 seconds to do?

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http://www.joshsway.com -- dating, online dating, fitness, fashion, and more...