should I tell her or ask her?



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nooneway
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 6:11 pm 
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erm...so hi.

I texted this girl that I've known for a while, and asked her that we should go to this place sometime midweek. She said she can't in the middle of the week (gave me a legit reason) and that she can do any time after. So I said Friday.

But now I want to text her and tell her about a time, and I'm kind of confused. Should I tell her meet me at this time, or should I ask her if x time would suit her?

I don't want it to seem bossy, but I don't want to be the other guy who constantly asks either.

Any ideas would be appreciated.

Thank you :mrgreen:
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Jay (Majik)
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 6:15 pm 
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Quote:
erm...so hi.

I texted this girl that I've known for a while, and asked her that we should go to this place sometime midweek. She said she can't in the middle of the week (gave me a legit reason) and that she can do any time after. So I said Friday.

But now I want to text her and tell her about a time, and I'm kind of confused. Should I tell her meet me at this time, or should I ask her if x time would suit her?

I don't want it to seem bossy, but I don't want to be the other guy who constantly asks either.

Any ideas would be appreciated.

Thank you :mrgreen:
TELL her. Always. Never ask. Be dominant.
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Snarg
PostPosted: Wed May 08, 2013 6:49 pm 
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I understand your concern for seeming too bossy. There's kind of a "polite happy medium" you need to strike.

"Let's meet near X at Y o'clock" is a good way of wording it.
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Shill
PostPosted: Thu May 09, 2013 6:49 am 
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Joined: Wed Mar 31, 2010 12:10 am
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Quote:
erm...so hi.

I texted this girl that I've known for a while, and asked her that we should go to this place sometime midweek. She said she can't in the middle of the week (gave me a legit reason) and that she can do any time after. So I said Friday.

But now I want to text her and tell her about a time, and I'm kind of confused. Should I tell her meet me at this time, or should I ask her if x time would suit her?

I don't want it to seem bossy, but I don't want to be the other guy who constantly asks either.

Any ideas would be appreciated.

Thank you :mrgreen:
Dude, you should've said you'll "give her a call on Friday" to lock it in... Anyway, you should suggest a time and ask her if that time is good for her too. Be courteous, don't boss her around and try to act like some "alpha macho man" who tells her what she's doing. Basically, when making arrangements, do the same as you would with a buddy. You wouldn't tell your friends "meet me at x place at x time" you'd make sure it's convenient for them.

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Nadine
PostPosted: Thu May 09, 2013 7:26 am 
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Quote:
I don't want it to seem bossy, but I don't want to be the other guy who constantly asks either.
There's asking and asking.
Good asking: "Let's say at place X at 8. Does that suit you?"
Bad asking: "What time would you like to meet? No, it doesn't matter for me either! Eehm, 6, 8? I really don't mind, you decide. Any time would be good for me. 8 then? Are you sure? Great, I'll see you at 8".
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Acclaim
PostPosted: Thu May 09, 2013 9:57 am 
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Next time ask her what she has planned during the week as opposed to saying "we should meet at time XXXX"
then ask her out gauged on her response.
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