Gf and I have been together for over a year. Around January I left home and went travelling with her for almost 3 months, across asia.

We were pretty in love. She's a great girl, does everything to please me, etc. But sometimes she's unintentionally bad. By that I mean, for example, she has a problem keeping perspective. So say if she's browsing photos on facebook she'd be really into it, and if we had to leave to go somewhere i'd ask her if she's ready and she'd say "i'm coming" or "yes, 5 minutes", but end up taking 25 minutes. It's not intentional because her nature is that she just gets absorbed into whatever she does, but it makes me angry and i've discussed this with her. But she's continued to do it.

Anyway, we had flights booked to go to another country and the night before she was looking at photos. She was just really absorbed and I went to bed at 2am next to her (she was in bed). When i woke up at 4am she was still there, typing stuff on facebook and generally making noise. I told her to go to sleep and she tried, but couldn't, and got back on her laptop. Then she found out that a family member was sick and started crying (not her fault obviously). She finished up at 6am, still not able to go to sleep, and kept typing and making enough noise to keep me awake until about 9am when I really cracked it at her and told her to stop and stay silent.

That day I broke it off with her and cancelled our flights, and booked a flight home. She continued to travel (she doesn't live in my country at the moment).

Did I overreact? She said she was stressed and didn't realise she was annoying me and I should've mentioned it earlier. I probably should have, but it doesn't excuse the behavior. She apologised to me the moment i woke up, but i told her it's not ok just to apologise every time after she does something wrong. She needs to make an effort to stop doing some of the things she does.

Anyway, I'm back home now and she's gonna visit me soon. I'm not sure what to do. I really love her and all but the relationship is getting rather serious and i'm not sure i want to commit to a girl who unintentionally keeps pissing me off. It's never anything major but after a while it really builds up and comes out all messy. Is it unhealthy that I'm with her expecting her to change?

Should I talk to her and offer another shot? or should i just forget and let her go? in all other ways she's fantastic. smart, active, driven, independent, etc.

That seems like an overreaction to me. You booked a flight home and broke up with her because she stayed up all night typing after hearing some upsetting news?

It's the kind of thing, that if a female friend told me a guy dumped her over, I would be incredulous. She obviously has a lot of ingrained habits, and it is fucking annoying when a girl is always late, or always takes too long to get ready. But in my opinion they're fairly minor, and to keep persecuting her for it would just make a mountain out of a mole hill and lead to perpetual arguing and a break up. But then if you simply cannot accept her habits, then leave. Trying to change someone, even for relatively minor foibles doesn't work in my experience. By all means communicate to them how it makes you feel, but don't force your rules upon them unless you want to lose them.

Yeah, its annoying, but you are never going to meet a girl who never does anything that annoys you.

hmmmm so what would be the move? should i be a little beta and contact her and try to talk? or should i just alpha and let her come to me when she's back? this sounds like one of those exceptions when you actually have to apologise...

If she's down to see you and she's apologetic, then apologise to her as well and explain that you just lost your temper etc. There is nothing beta about apologising sometimes.