Hello fellas

Did post this in another thread but suppose it works better here.

Met a girl who is a few years younger than me. She is 18 and I am 23. Played the game, cocky/funny, never needy etc. Started off texting alot but finally got her on a date after a few months and did the business. Fell for her, made some rookie mistakes such as showing jealousy and even got her a present for when she passed a course she was on. Idiot I know! All of a sudden, she lost interest and wouldn't commit to another date, then she went hot saying she wanted to see me and now she is back to cold and said she wants to be friends.

I have played it cool and not text etc and she sent me a message saying;

'Your giftcard present has just paid for a beautiful pair of shoes. Thanks xx'

How would you respond to this guys and what should be my next move?

Any help would be majorly appreciated!

Don't beat yourself up for giving her a gift, if it was genuine at the time then you did no wrong. You're reflecting on it now as a mistake/with regret because you're hungup on her still and it didn't go down as you'd wanted.

She's thanking you for the gift, I wouldn't read much into it. Simply tell her you're welcome, and if she keeps talking its possible she was using that to re-ngage you, if not then she's likely just being polite.

this.

Great points!

I'd just respond with "Ok".

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Reply : " Your welcome Jenny/Jane/Michelle"

Goal: Act like it wasn't for her.
Why ? : Women are possessive, if she gets a hint of another women in your life she will get fired up.

Oh for the name, its best if you use the name of a woman that you both know, maybe an old girlfriend even. After you send that message, don't respond to her for a day (24 hours). Enough time for her to call her friends and gossip about you.

The next day, you can laugh it off as a joke. Worked for me the last time, hope it works for you.
Cheers,

Horrible advice. Assuming the worst from people is a sure fire way of creating dysfunctional relationships.

n2thevoid:

Do you part-time as a marriage Councillor ?

This guy is being played, he needs to man up. Your response of " okay" will put him in the "nice guy dumpster".

Teasing is what gets a guy laid.

only a low self esteem girl will tolerate shit like that ^. That just seems assholish. I would personally text her instead the classic "Who is this"? with a smiley face and then said you are welcome. It creates attraction and politely says welcome at the same time .

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Actually I do couples counseling through using various approaches including Emotion Focused Therapy, as well as work with individuals. Funny you should ask.

She did something good, you rewarded her, this is not AFC. Although don't go overboard with gifts obviously.
She thanks you, you say "You are welcome". Simple. Mr Assertive-s advice is the same but in a funny way, I like it

Instead of duking this out over words. Let's put out a standing challenge.

If you go with the okay text response ( which i presume you have already done ). Report back to this thread in one week ( after one week that gift is old) and tell us how far you have gotten with the "ok" response.

If being the nice guys brings you back this girl, kudos to you. If it doesn't and your still in the nice guy dumpster, then say so. That should settle this matter once in for all.

i dont think anybody here thinks "youre welcome" is like some super response thats gonna get him laid or anything. the point of that response is simply that you don't wanna chase her or put effort in. his mistake the first time around was chasing too much and being too needy/afc.

his response not only allows him to play it cool, but in the event that she is just being friendly, it doesnt really lower his value much more in her eyes (and it may even raise it). and also, if she is interested in him its not like shes just gonna give up after he gives her one short text message response. theres no harm in leaving the ball in her court and making her chase/work a little for him if she wants his attention back.

dont get me wrong, i like your response a lot and id definitely use it sometime, but i dont think this is the right place for it. i think that a lot of times on this forum guys try way too hard to always have some kind of cocky/funny response to every single thing a girl says or texts to them when its best to just sprinkle that stuff in much more sparingly.