Let me start off by saying my intent is not a 1 night stand, I am sincerely interested in this otherwise unavailable woman.

We met at work, at first we didn't notice each other heavily but after about a week when I had to switch to a computer near her we started to notice each other.

I'll skip the boring stuff and get to the tell signs that she was/is interested.

1) Looking at, then quickly looking away.
2) sustained eye contact followed by laughing
3) Caught her blushing when I wore a under-shirt that was form fitting for casual Fridays.
4) One day she sowed up to work with a picture of Uncle Sam, as she walked out to go to the washroom I asked her what the picture was for...she winked at me and walked out.

She has a boyfriend but generally avoids calling him her Boyfriend (they've been dating for 2 years).

We have uncanny similarities in our personality.
We think the same way, we like the same things, we enjoy each other's company, talk to each other almost daily, even when we first wake up and have gone out for drinks/the "get to know you better" date.

So recently she's been giving me conflicting information.
For example, she plays dumb when I say lets go out and have some fun and sends a text saying *smirks* and says no.

After the last "get to know you better" date we had, some comments were made and it lead to the "I need to be clear" conversation which I initiated.

This is exactly what I said

"Yeah, I should probably be clear on that subject now. You're spoken for and if you're anything like me you're pretty loyal so I wouldn't presume to get in the way of your relationship. Plus that's one hell of a way to kill a friendship I value."

Her response was something about not liking the term loyal, that she's happy to spend time with me, that we could be good friends, that she thinks I'm funny but she doesn't want to have that kind of tension. Then goes on to say that she's not a fan of workplace relationships even if she was single but that's not entirely a deal breaker.

We then proceed to set up the next "get to know you better" date.

So from my perspective.
1) The fact that she's mentioning that if she was single indicates she's thinking about the option, especially since she's saying it's not necessarily a deal breaker.

2) There's some clear attraction on both sides of the fence, given body language, similarities in personality and the willingness to go out again so soon after having this conversation.

3) The main obstacle is simply the boyfriend.

What I find confusing, however, is some of the mixed messages I've been getting.
She's never once said that she didn't like me in the romantic way but she's used the dreaded "f" word (friends).
The smirk and no comment also sends mixed messages, does this mean she's playing hard to get, the "I like to kiss before I f&*k" game or is she sincere about it?

Then there's our last conversation and her wanting to go out and meet again as well as her comment on how she realized I liked her but was curious how I was going to proceed.

I think there's a chance still but at this point I believe that the best course of action would be to simply play the waiting game...I feel that being overly aggressive would only damage the situation and maximizing her exposure to "what she is missing" is simply the next best step until her current relationship goes on the fritz, which I expect it to given the guy dresses like a fucking pirate, he's a total extrovert while she's a introvert and he's already managed to f^&k up a previous marriage he's had.

What are your thoughts on this? Is my analysis accurate and my strategy sound? Advice would be appreciated as well.

She's also admitted to snooping through my phone before, I don't particularly see that as a bad thing...I view it as she's doing research.

I read most of what you wrote, I think the girl is attracted to you but your making yourself to available. When you mentioned she was looking through your phone its most likely because she wants to see if your talking to other girls, which you should be (don't put everything on a girl who has a bf). Game other girls sometimes in front of her so she sees you have a higher value than just her, this in return will have her coming at you more.

Agreed with the guy above me you must game other girls and stop focusing on this one so much, it seems like (especially with how long this post was) you're coming from a place of scarcity in terms of women. If you have plenty of options you're bound to act in a more desirable way around her since you wouldn't overanalyze everything since there's plenty of other girls out there.

You said ljbf first, putting yourself in the friendzone. She's probably just as confused by your behavior. Find a way to be more congruent next time. Don't make this mistake again. Wait for her relationship to dissolve while you fuck other girls, or tell her you want her.

Thanks for the advice. I don't particularly have problems bringing my A game, I've done the whole stealing girlfriends, turning lesbians and dating models thing before...but this is just different, I didn't give a damn about those other women but in a month and a half this one seems to just add something special to life...yeah it's like being pussy whipped without the pussy...it fucking sucks.

Anyhow gaming women in front of her could backfire given her personality, with her subtlety seems to work better so to that end I was thinking of using micro escalations on women in front of her but not actually having them lead anywhere that would hurt her for 2 reasons, 1) if I hurt her I'd feel like a piece of fried dog shit and 2) if I hurt her like that or if she caught on, she'd lose respect for me and probably walk out (and there goes any chance I had)

I don't think I'm actually over thinking it though, I'm just the kind of guy who forms strategies and generally dictates how interaction goes...I blame working for a cell phone company (having to charm people into not being pissed off 5 days a week) and me being a Gemini (if you believe that sort of thing).

So layer on the advice! I'll keep updating this thread with anything worth sharing or when I need more advice.

Your missing the point stop getting oneitis over this one girl, when she is the center of your world SHE HAS ALL THE POWER, stop chasing after her make her come after you and game some other girls so your not only focused on this girl or you'll start to obsess about her which isn't good for gaming

Yep last message was right on. Sounds like you like this girl so much that you don't want to fuck her. I generally employ the build up her BF like a house of cards and watch them crumble deal. You can't care too much, but if she brings him up always choose his side.

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Cogito ergo sum

I'd do her in ways that would make the karma sutra blush but that's besides the point, lol. What do other people think of this approach? Build up her boyfriend like a stack of cards just to see it topple? Seems like it could work but it also seems like relying on him to totally fuck up. (I also know he's totally threatened by me and a bit of a beta male where I'm a lone-wolf alpha type, last time I went out with his girl he tried pawning the "she only though I was okay" on me while she constantly tells me how much fun she had.)

We're going out for her b-day on thurs after work. I told her she chooses where since last time I chose. What tricks should I pull to draw us closer?

Also, today I tried the typical look then look away move on her, she gave me a distinct "feels bad and awkward" moment...I'm hoping that's progress.

^It's not besides the point, it is the point. You say you are a Lone-wolf Alpha. Well what is congruent with that approach?: Game this girl like she's a little princess, or game this girl like she's like any other slut who's had a mouthful of cum? You keep talking about her like she's special and that is fucking up your game. You've got to be willing to loose her if you want to get her, but I don't think you have the balls when it comes to this chick. Also the look and look away "move" only works when you first open a girl, you can't run game like that after day one.

_________________
Cogito ergo sum

What's congruent with the approach is drop subtle hints now and then, maximize exposure without seeming needy or overly clingy, let her establish contact and suggest meeting up at least half the time and when the time is right use micro escalation on her while keeping the conversation non-sexual.

The idea is to get her thinking of me in the way she's become used to think of her boyfriend and to sexualize our interactions on a sub-conscious level.

So far my general strategy has been this.

*let her wonder
*let her get to know me
*let her show interest
*ask her out
*let her set the date
*admit I like her in a non-threatening way
*let her set up the next date
from here in is where I'm stumped...by now if I played the game how I normally do I would have slept with her/fooled around, she would have felt guilty and she'd eventually start to avoid me out of sheer guilt for cheating.

This weekend is her b-day, we have plans to go out Thursday (if her fever is gone, she was really, really sick today). This date what should I do to increase her interest in me? We already know each other fairly well so I could either.

1) delve into the stuff we don't normally share (thinking of making it a drinking game)
2) try some basic micro escalation and react accordingly (if we're at a bar where its too loud to talk and we can only dance inside or talk into eachother's ear).
3) keep doing what I've been doing, which is starting to lose effect (I need to switch up my game plan to something that'll keep her interested.)

Keep in mind she's far from stupid and can read me fairly easily (we don't even have to talk half the time to communicate any emotions...and we're both fairly deadpan and hard to read) so I can't be too overt.

Sounds like you are onto something. Keep doing your thing. Don't let her throw you off your game. You are close. Hang in there. Push it. Don't let go. Ride this out till you make it.

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What you sow is what you reap

Well had another successful date, as far as I can tell it's just a matter of time. We mix like water and water while her boyfriend and her mix like watered down oil and water (sort of but not entirely). Personally I think its just a matter of time before it happens at the rate we're going.