Thanks for the comment, man. The only questions I have now is should I even respond to her if she contacts me before I'm done with my hard next? And how would I go about getting a meet up and also attitude on the phone or at the meetup.(i.e. be friendly and then flirtatious on the meet up , do what she first fell for? be cold and very unresponsive?). I just don't want to deter from the plan and frame.

Just politely tell her that you need some time and space for yourself at the moment.

Any tips on how I should handle it if she ends up dating someone exclusively? A rebound? Just wait it out? Or continue some interaction after the next?

Id like to know how you're gonna tell her that you need some time, and how well she will receive it. I'd say wait it out, however there is a risk of her loving the rebound lol

Well I know 90% of rebounds don't last lol. I'm just wondering how I'm going to telegraph interest without it being too much or too little. I'm only going to tell her I need space if she hits me up earlier than the month. But at the same time idk if I can leverage that. maybe if she hits me up more than once. What ya think?. But if the month passes then ill just reinitiate a conversation through a phone call (because I'm a man) and have a small interesting talk then I'm going to ask her for lunch or something simple like going to the mall to help me pick something out (that way I can scenery change many times and build many new memories). If she doesn't want to meet up or its too soon then ill say "okay", keep doing what I'm doing, try again a week or two later. If that doesn't work then it's time to move on! But I'm pretty sure it'll work the first time .

P.S. I'm trying to recover my game completely or to a good level before I start talking to her again, I noticed some weak points while talking to some new girls. Relationships definitely make u sacrifice some skills ,huh lol

You created quite good plan for getting her back and all, but you are in wrong mindset, which is completely understandable, because it is impossible to be in right mindset so soon after breakup...

Yes, getting ex back is a game but you have to be truly prepared to play it, and you have to be prepared INSIDE.

And you will be prepared only when you are ready to let her go and when you convince yourself that you relationship is over. Thats why setting 1 month time frame and stuff are mistake. You are ready when you are ready... And as long as you are focused to get her back, you are not ready to get her back... I know it sounds crazy but i m sure that a lot of people here agree with me.

And nope, you dont reinitiate contact... She have to do it, no matter that you are a man... If you initate contact, she gains all the power cuz it simply shows her that you were unable to get over her so she can play you any way she wants...

So you dont have to play game to get her back, but to get over her... And when you reach that point, you have best chance that she will come running after you. I dont know is that possible (due to friend circle you are in) but it would be best for you to completely ignore her life and know about it as little as possible... That way you may not even know about her rebounds or stuff, it will make your life much easier, and will prevent you from doing wrong steps...

If you find out that she is in rebound anyway, you just ignore it... If you try to interfere with it any way, you will just make it stronger.

NC, hard next etc is for you, not for her.

Preach! Deep down I knew this already but it felt more like an "aha!" Moment when I read it in text form. Your completely right, I won't be able to get her back unless I can fully let her go and regain my own frame. Even if I was able to reclaim her I would not be able to keep her because I haven't completely recovered, so what's left to do is for me to work on myself more and work on getting over it.

This will be a hard mental struggle for me especially since I'm a software developer and I'm just sitting in front of a computer ALl day in complete silence. So she constantly turns up in my head. It's getting easier now but I'm gonna try and listen to some inner game stuff to block her out of my thoughts. Any mental tricks to help?

Btw I forgot to mention when I checked her phone there was this guy that always hits her up and he's always complimenting her, she ALWAYS responded with smiley faces( no words though). I didn't think much of it but once she saw my phone and she said how some of my smileys were flirtatious I then said " I didn't care about urs and u had ALOT of smileys!" She responded and said that she didn't even say anything back. But I think this is female flirtation. I found out from mutual friends that she's going out AlOT now! Alot of guys inviting her out and she's taking the offers. I think she's really trying to get over me but at the same time this shows really bad characteristics in my opinion. IT seems like she disguised herself as a good girl this whole time but outside of the relationship she is a total smut. I don't think she sleeping with them but just going out with any body that offers is suspect, isn't it? I'm definitely cutting his one as a loss and reevaluating my evaluation process. Not mention she hardly has girl friends they are all guys. Red flag? Or am I thinking too much ( she was a Tom boy before) she does think sort of like a guy yet dresses like a woman.

*update: drunk venting post lol

They really should change the name of this forum from Pick Up Artist to Guys Who Need Relationship Advice. Jesus.

KDNthesuaveAMOG I seriously wouldn't turn to a forum of guys who suck with women (PUAs excepted) to tell you how to deal with your bleeding heart.

Just end the interaction with her, then figure out how to interact with women, then figure out what you really want in a woman, then learn how to write succinctly, then report back to us.

In all seriousness, the absolute best way to get a woman out of your head is to get another one in there. Probably better advice is to be single for a while and spend your time doing things that you are interested in and get your life to a place where you are happy with it.

Lmao dude I was totally drunk when I wrote that. However, they were my true amplified feelings and I'd rather post it up here than drunk text her lol. I've come to realize that I was being betaized in the relationship this thread below helped me out. Never again, lesson well learned.

http://www.personalpowermeditation.com/ ... n-process/

Here's an update, she texted me today, "Happy Easter to you and your family Kedian (with a few emojis)." I'm still straight on my NC.

Well we texted a bit and she told me she's going celibate until she gets married or whatnot because we had an abortion at the beginning of the relationship. Everything is going Kool so far and I'm just going at this on a friend level basis...

Well guys after all these days, everything has come to a conclusion. We exchanged a couple of texts after i thanked her for a happy easter and after a regular fun conversation I then asked her, out of respect, to just tell me what was her view point and if it was affected by anyone. Ive seriously decided to go my own path but here are the final exchanges:

This is her last text "It was honestly no one. No one convinced me because at that time, I wasn't talking to anyone. Not you, not my friends, no one at all. It was a lonely week of self reflection. I thought about the past, looked at my present, and imagined my future. I had realized that I'm not happy with where I am in life right now. Growing up, I imagined my life differently at 23. And then I thought about what is stoping me from being where I want to be. I couldn't figure it out.. But what I had realized is that I was beginning to care about my future (career & education) more than I cared about seeing you and talking to you. It was starting to cloud my thoughts and i realized that I'm becoming so emotionally attached with school and teaching, that it was taking away my thought of you. It wasnt fair to you. I came to the conclusion that I can't focus on both things at the same time. I had to unfortunately remove one from my life. I needed the school and the teaching. You were more of a want. Someone I wanted to be with rather than someone I needed to be with. I also then thought about our relationship and that's when it hit me and I just saw it going down Jill for many reasons. It was a decision I had to make but didnt want to go through it. It was the hardest thing I had to do. But I still feel like it's what's best for the both of us. I need to be single to focus on my priorities and I can't ask you to wait for me because that's not fair to you. You deserve to be happy with someone that can provide you with all of the things I can't at this time. You want to go out with your friends that party, you deserve a girl that wants to do the same or wants you to do that as well. I'm not that girl. I have up on my partying days. I want a man that doesn't go clubbing or to bars. You have a high sex drive, I don't have that anymore. You deserve a girl that is as spontaneous as you. I'm not her.

Long story short, I've realized that I'm changing as in maturing. I don't feel like I'm in college anymore. I want a husband. I want a family. I want children and you're not ready for that. I don't want to change you. I want you to stay true to who you are. I can't change for you because I like the way I am. So this is why I feel that it's best we've gone our seperate ways. I care about you more than you can imagine. Words can't describe how much I miss you, but I don't miss being with you. I want you in my life as a friend. Because you are a wonderful person. You're just not the one I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. Please don't take any of this in a negative way. I'm trying my best to be as completely honest with you. I hope you can understand.."


And this was my last one, "Thank you for being completely honest with me. It did bring back some hurtful emotions but I appreciate this convo between us much more and it relaxes me. This is what I still want to keep between us I still want to be able to invite you places, I still want u to hang with my me and friends, I still want u to tell me about ur shitty days lol, maybe even some secrets about urself, I still want you to be happy and find someone and not have to worry about me. I agree with what you say, and I think I am maturing and that's why i am definitely not ready for a family, I'm not ready to marry, I'm not ready to settle. Right now I am at my lowest point as an adult and the only way I see myself committing to anything is when I am in my peek. I can already see this a year from now, maybe even a few more years from now. I'm still becoming my best self and that is why I'm working harder now, I'm back in the Mma gym, I'm studying, I'm dating more now, I'm widdening my social circle, im handling my professional life better and I'm just reaching for my best self. I'm sure your doing the same."


And my second text right after, " I really did enjoy the relationship but the way I see it is that my life is like a path or a road, it is only going in one direction and there is no end to it. I can only see the road continuing beyond the horizon. Now what makes this road more amplified is when you can share it with someone else. When you joined me, the road widened and became much more fulfilling and easier to travel. It was AMAZING. However there are times when things change and we hit a fork in the road. This is where you took a new direction and we split ways. Yes it hurts and I will miss you but it's something that can't be helped. My road will continue on the same path.. And who knows, maybe one day you'll be at the the lane merger or intersection... But for now at-least we can separately view each other's roads from across and afar, I can see your smile and you can see mine... Now lets just make sure that regardless of the path we take we don't sever that view from each other... Always Stay in touch."

I know its long but i wanted to keep it as raw and unedited as possible.My gratitude goes out to you Guys for support and every thing. But I'm truly at peace with this and I'm currently sarging all over. If anything guys, give feedback so to avoid mess ups in future relationships. But I think this one ended well.

Always contiue on your path to become a better you.

Thanks for sharing KDNthesuaveAMOG. From man to man, your messages to her show a good deal of neediness and insecurity. I hope you work on your game and can get to that ever coveted AMOG position.

Keep playing, keep posting.

- Just do whatever you like to do. Continue what you have started, but if she really make final decision and all your hard work, will go for nothing, you have to respect that and move on. You have no choice but accept her decision.