Hi, I am...a female. A 31 year old female, that have seen guys suffer silently in clubs, bars, libraries, etc. unable to cross the threshold of insecurity and shyness. When I first found this site I was a little appalled, but then I saw that most posts are by guys who post in silent desperation, hoping to get answers from complete strangers on how to turn their lives around because nothing else has worked. So, as a female, I thought "who could give better answers on questions about girlfriends and friends than women themselves??" So, ask away if you have any questions regarding anything on this thread. )

I'll bite. I know nothing of how to talk to a girl. Teach me something please.

Well, it all depends on what type of girls you are interested in, the reason for talking to her, and what scares you about talking to girls?

Interesting... How about actions in this event

Meet at chick in a bar/ club. Seems like a nice normal girl, conversation is good. Not to easy or eager to jump in the sack.
Best route to getting a Kclose

It depends on why she is talking to you. Maybe she is just being nice, if you started talking first. Or maybe she is interested in you. Try to avoid talking about yourself, and see if she asks questions. If she does, she is interested. The best is to use sarcastic humor, as sarcasm is a sign of intellect, and girls like that like intellect and wit. Ask her questions, but not a lot. Make some funny observations about the surroundings, and try to keep a relaxing SPAM. If she plays with her hair, or is fidgety, that means she likes you. Try to physically touch her, but not in a creepy "Scary Movie" kinda touch, where the guy touches that chick with his little hand, but as in if she says something funny, reach out and push her shoulder a little, like "you're bad". Or rub your knee on hers "by accident" under the table, but don't acknowledge it like "oh, my bad", just let it be natural.

I'll bite.

Posted this thread about an hour ago, will paraphrase.

Seeing my ex tomorrow night (was more of a fling than anything. only lasted a week). She's coming over to my house (i mentioned drinking last week).

Last time she came over I had 0 game. Looking back my younger brother would've done better than me.

I think I have a better idea of what to do this time. Any advice can be appreciated.

If she is an ex, have you discussed the terms you are on now? Just a friend? Or "we'll see what happens?" Or "we need some time apart?" It COULD be the case where there is nothing you can do about getting the game. You have mentioned drinking, but so what? People dont just drink to get trashed and have drunk sex, maybe she is just bored and wants to come over in a non sexual way? Whatever it is, dont try to start anything unless you see the signals, like her coming in physical contact with you, or smiling suggestively, etc. If you didnt have game last time, that means that she knows that you dont mind not getting game, and invite her over, so you COULD be friendzoned. But, I am not saying that thats for sure. Try watching a movie with her while drinking, preferably a scary one

Talia, how do you feel about guys that use Cocky & Funny attitudes to pick up women?

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It depends on how much cockiness is involved. If a guy is cocky on a self-obsessed selfish kinda side, which only pays attention to himself, then no amount of funny would help it, in my case. I prefer sarcastic-cocky, but to an extent. If that continues with no attempt to get somewhere, then thats a no no. Cocky can also be a synonym for sarcastic, which women usually enjoy. The best combination is about 30% cocky, 50% humorous, and 20% romantic. But, like I said, some damaged chicks like to be ignored and put down all together, so go figure. I am only replying to my own preferences.

Have already hooked up before since breakup.

Thanks for the advice.

Cheers

Then all I can say is that maybe she wasnt in the mood, or it wasnt a "hook" kinda night. Yeah, def a horror movie and some alcohol, lol. Good luck

The worst type of advise a dude can get is from women(though talia well intended), the reason is that women do not seduce or pick up women on a constant basis or at all, unless bi and lesbian, and even those are not the same cause it comes under the radar. Women do not even understand themselves if you press them what really attracted them to a dude. Anyways, a fish can not tell a fisherman how to fish them... Nothing against Talia she is well intended. But for you guys out there, DO NOT GET ADVISE FROM WOMEN, that is why the community is here, most guys took advise from mothers, sisters, female friends "just be nice"..

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Uhm, no, I can definitely tell you what attracted me to my guy, besides his looks: super intelligence, wit, and sarcasm. Also, I don't give "just be nice"advise if you are looking for some skanks. I dont like them myself, so go ahead and deceive them ,I dont care. I have given guys advise on how to "lure" in a chick just to bang her. no skin off my back. I don't have that "woman have to bond together" issue, so I am not going to tell you to be kind and sweet to a girl that you only want to use as a f buddy for an hour. However, some guys are looking for a relationship, and if you will start off a relationship with a lie, you are not going to be successful in a long run.

Hey, Talia. What a great thread! I've always believed that in order for you to get deeply emerged into the mind of women in general, you must return to the Source. That's why in the beginning of my journey I just talked to absolutely every girl and woman I could - open, build a little comfort, ask them to help me out as I'm conducting a qualitative research on the subject. That's where I got the best insights and ideas from.
I've realized that there's not an archetype of masculinity or manliness that all women relate to.
I've also realized that if there's one thing that truly matters when sarging, its plasticity.

It's great that you know what turns you on in a man. However, some girls are unresponsive to sarcasm and humour. Others get beaten down if you're way more sexual than they are. Still, there are those who have their bitch shield so high up their asses that you have to treat them like absolute crap in order for them to respond well.
Thus, in order to be successful, you either have to choose an exact type of women you'd like to be with, or you have to be mega flexible in your approach so that you rarely, if ever, get rejected.

What's your opinion on what I've just written?

Also, whats your take on conveying sexuality? You know, the beastly kind. I've found that most girls let go and want you to dominate them after being teased mercilessly in bed for a long time (and my style involves a long time (several hours) before getting to that point).
Do you think its a good idea to show it explicitly in some of the previous stages? Actually, what do you think is more important - showing you're comfortable talking about it and that you're confident about it, or showing that you're a raging bull waiting to rupture your next target? Again, some girls love the latter, others feel a bit weird and incompetent.

Thanks and have a great remainder of the weekend

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