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So over the weekend I hit it off with a cute bartender, got her number and we have been texting frequently since then. Just last night she said she was bored at work and hinted that I should stop by and I did. Met a few friends and had some drinks then me and her found a little corner to talk, this is where I blew it. Initially I kept the focus on her but then started talking about myself and then, stupidly, I began talking about my bad childhood with no father, an abusive mother and how I was molested by my grandfather. She kept looking down and fidgeting the whole time I was talking so I think I revealed way to much and made her uncomfortable. After that I told how I was in and out of jail a lot but that I've changed my ways. Soon they were getting ready to close so I said goodnight and told her we should plan for a lunch date she said ok. Is there any way I can salvage this on the lunch date?
Get her talking about her childhood and LISTEN.
Show her that you aren't someone who is looking for self pity and whining to her about it. But more someone who is willing to open up and express yourself. And by listening to her, it will allow her to realize that you are curious about getting to know her as a person. Everyone has a past. There is no reason to be ashamed of it. If you are on a path to become the best man that you could possibly become, your rough past will actually make you appear to be a strong person. Alot of guys have a problem showing a girl any vulnerability... personally, I think its necessary (maybe not to that extreme but you didn't really ruin anything from what I can see) to express that you are a HUMAN BEING and not some player.