Hi, been doing it all wrong for years! 27 and virgin



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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2013 1:44 pm 
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Joined: Wed Feb 27, 2013 12:26 pm
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Hi, I'm 27 and a virgin. I live in Belgium. My goal is not to fuck every girl I meet but find one I like and hang on to that one. I've been reading PUA books and forums for almost a year now. I quickly concluded I was doing basically everything wrong.
So I've been trying to apply theory to practice on my own and I'm learning I've been talking to girls more, even went to the beach this summer and walking along the waterline I approached all the girls I liked and just started a conversation. But I'm not getting results. I apologise for any mistakes in this story, I'm not a native English speaker.

Right now there's this girl I'm trying to figure out that I know from a youth organisation since this summer and she always wants to hang out with me on camps, gatherings and such. We always have a great time. This summer I wasn't too interested in her since she's 18 and I'm 27, she had a boyfriend and I was dating another girl at the time. But things went nowhere with that other one and I always kept her in mind.
I didn't see her for months (we sporadically messaged each other but not often) but on feb 1st there was a newyearsreception of our organization and she asked me if I wanted to travel there together. Which was awkward because it basically doubled my travel time. Still I felt I couldn't pass on the opportunity. At the time I thought there might be something more. I already asked her in the summer if her boyfriend was the one for her and she did not seem convinced.
That evening I failed to make much progress. In the car on the way there I only managed some fluff talk and at the reception neither of us was comfortable being around each other it seemed. I felt that pretty much immediately and spent most of my time talking and having fun with other girls. I'm sure she noticed this too and she wanted to leave early, saying she was tired and therefore not having a good time. So I dropped her off at her parent's and went home.
A couple days later we were messaging and I mentioned it was too bad we wouldn't see each other for a while. I was ready to give up but after a 10 min silence she suggested we got together next sunday for lunch. (Food seems to be one of her passions.) This would occur whilst her boyfriend was at work in a restaurant. She even suggested we go eat there, so he wouldn't be jealous (apparently she told him about me, and she mentioned he was afraid she'd fall in love with me), but changed her mind quickly and decided it was better to go elsewhere.
So we went to eat a her favourite place in town and afterwards to some other place for dessert (she even had 2 desserts - which was hilarious to witness because she's actually real skinny).
I asked her again if her boyfriend was the right guy for her, if he completely fullfilled her and such. This time her answer was more hesitant. She did seem to understand why I asked the question and based her answer upon that. She said right now he was the one for her, but she couldn't predict what was going to happen in the future and that could change. So at that time I didn't know how to proceed and I decided to end the date right there and went home.
Since we live rather far apart, we keep in touch by online messaging. She has a pretty good idea what I'm after right now and it scares her I think, because she might be afraid what her friends will think of her. I tried the 'Our World' routine but it didn't work, I think because she's not the type for it, too smart and she claims she does what she wants all the time. Right now, I don't know what to do anymore, but I'd hate to give up too.

What do you think about this? Which mistakes did I make? Can I still proceed with a chance of success and if so how? It could be some months before I see her again, when we go on weekend with our group.

Thanks for reading.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2013 12:09 am 
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Joined: Thu Nov 22, 2012 12:36 am
Posts: 135
try comfort more since you said it was awkward.
and talk less about her bf it makes you seem desperate to want to her to break up.
Do something fun and creative like drawing on walls using chalk its fun :)

dont care about her bf dont treat her like she has a bf and soon she wont have a bf ;)

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http://poypickup.tumblr.com/


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2013 12:35 pm 
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Joined: Wed Feb 27, 2013 12:26 pm
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Thanks officialpoypoy, you make some good points! I will use them as best I can.
Quote:
try comfort more since you said it was awkward.
Yeah it looked like we were a couple since we arrived together and that was weird. Could you explain a bit more what you mean by 'try comfort more'? I think this might indeed be the way to go. One thing she likes about her bf is that she doesn't have to be mature all the time and can be 'like a child'. So she might be looking for comfort in that sense too.
Quote:
Do something fun and creative like drawing on walls using chalk its fun
I like that idea actually, taking some chalk next time :)


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