so my ex and i have been apart for almost 9 months now after being together for 4 years, she broke up with me. in the past 8 months weve had a good amount of arguments, but as of about december i pretty much stopped talking to her completely.

The other weekend she came to a party at my fraternitys house and saw me hitting on girls and screamed at me and said i was an asshole and left crying. The next afternoon i called her to tell her that her actions at my party were completely unacceptable and that if she couldnt be mature around me at my parties she should not come. She screamed at me a little and i just hung up.

She texted me yesterday saying she hates how our relationship has been "tainted" by all the fighting and that she thought she could just deal with it but it was really bothering her. i told her if she wanted to get together i would be willing to, and she said yea get together as in a meal to catch up. i agreed to it, but i know she specified "a meal to catch up" because she knows i want to fuck her.

anyways, so we are going to go grab lunch later this week, my question is this, how can i fuck her? how can i escalate when we are sitting across from each other at a table talking about our classes, plans for spring break, summer, etc?

Just to confirm, is she trying to meet up with you to hash out some issues? Or is it just pre-fuck ASD leading to the inevitable?

While this has happened to me in the past, I really regretted, essentially, using this girl for sex. I never felt great AFTER actually sleeping with her...its almost like getting an itch scratched and moving on.

The likely outcome i can see here is that you kind of guilt her into thinking its okay to sleep with each other no-strings-attached. It happens and she's an even bigger pain in your ass.

I'm a girl, and here's my answer:

if you want this drama and this unacceptable behavior to continue, then flirt with her and schmooze and charm her. She'll be putty in your hands. But she'll also keep showing up at your frat's parties (which by the way is ridiculous, why was she even there if you guys are broken up?)

if you like this kind of argumentative, emotional outburst, drama thing, just to get the nookie every now and then, then go for it, but I just think that sleeping with her will prolong things and make her act much worse. It will lead her on too. I know you want to get laid, but why can't you sleep with someone else who doesn't come along with all this stuff? and why did you guys break up, while we're at it?

We broke up basically because she freaked out that she had nothing in her life besides me and it scared her. I am currently regularly getting with 3 different girls. I want to fuck her again because she broke up with me, and because I still have feelings for her and I'm sure we will still have a strong connection.

ok I see. I'm glad you are so honest about it well i guess then if you really want to, go for it, but I think it will be even more messy, and like the other person said, she's gonna be more of a pain in the ass. And to do that, just pay her some attention, because evidentally she doesn't like it when you ignore her. Try to control the situation if you end up meeting up. put a hand on her leg, or do "kino" or whatever its called. Look longingly in her eyes.

so we are going to lunch on thursday, just wanted to bump this to see if i could get a few more responses...

a little more info that might help you answer
-she is, for lack of a better word, prude. she has to get a guy with a lot before shell have sex with him
-she is the epitome of a "good girl" as i said not promiscuous, straight A student, involved on campus etc.
-she said months back she could never have sex with me again after hearing that ive had sex with a bunch of girls after she broke up with me
-she knows i want to fuck her, i have told her this many times in the past

i mean, there has to be SOME interest still if she says our fighting "tainted" our relationship and she doesnt like it being like that, but could she only be sour that the memories are tainted and not want to fuck me again? i feel like this is probably the case, and i want to plow her regardless.

months ago when i was the one asking her to spend time with me again she said yes but only for like a meal and i told her i wanted more than that, she said our relationship wasnt about sex (referring to when we were dating). this is what has got me thinking that she might just miss the emotional connection and maybe not so much wants the sex again.