Alright so, Long story short, In high-school I was a nerd, So i have inferiority complex issues. Much the same as low self esteem and what not, I get needy with girls, Always have. Including my current fiance of 7 years since college. I am now 27 and we have had 5 group sex encounter's with several different friends over the last couple years. I was fortunate enough to grow into some really good looks (I look alot like ryan gosling), I learn how to exercise and turned out very athletic. I have a natural ability to listen and care, So that seems to work really well at this age, That did not back in high-school. I attribute this to my random success at pulling together group sex so easily.

Fiance is perfectly fine with all this and enjoys it. She enjoys girls in the bedroom a great deal. Now the issue is, I tend to get needy over the other girls, Even though i am truly grateful and love my relationship with my fiance very much. My fiance recognizes and understands these problems and supports me in trying to help fix these issues. I have decided the only way to fix my "Clinginess" is to be with more women. This is how I started into PUA tactics. I have read "The Game" as well as Chase Amante's "How to make women chase" I preferred the latter as I dont pick women up in clubs for this type of situation. Usually I am immediatly into mid-game because the pickup comes from just hanging out with friends of friends, Who may become more.

So here is the problem. About 9 month ago we met our mot recent couple. An old male friend of mine from 10 years back, Ran into him and his new girl at a gas station. Got to hanging out and we really kicked it off friend wise. throughout the month flirting with his girl became more and we all 4 ended up having sex 3 different times, We had an amazing blast during the buildup of the night, and I am very articulate in bed and no doubt she had amazing sex those nights. So i guarantee I left an amazing imprint into the mind.

Then I tarted to get needy. Really needy, Such as confessing my feelings and such and that we where closer with them then any other couple ever. Yadda yadda stupid mouth....Several times she acknowledged my feelings and was even very clingy herself for a few month, when i was playing my game right :/

The last 5 months has been me trying to get her back, because I have stayed friends with them, I have to. He is a great friend of mine and always has been. We all 4 get along splendidly sex or not, I cant cut that off. But it's tearing me to pieces. I will detach for a while and cancel on her a couple times to the point where she will try to look good for me. She will want to hang out at least once a week and she initiates the hang outs. Then for some reason I get to comfortable and i start investing justa bit to much. Then bam, Back to not seeing her for 3 weeks and she cancels on me 4 time in a row. But then we are simply friends at this point, So am i taking it to personally when she cancels? Probably, But I know better than to say anything to her. I simply say it alright and proceed to cancel on her until she re-invests. Is this the right way to go?

Any advice anyone could give me, I think I should probably start to Kino her more. Just so you know we all 4 are very close, we have built a strong connection and where friends with benefits for a good 2 months where she got very clingy with me, then i got clingy and screwed it. I am hoping this makes my chances better. Same as getting back an ex that you where clingy with right?

I greatly appreciate the help in advance, This is killing me. I am always worried that if I seem to distant she will disappear.

Sounds like you are pretty messed up relationship-wise to me!

There is nothing wrong with being with many couples, woman, girls etc.

You should either built on a strong connection with the three of you, which means there is room for your neediness and you don't have to play games anymore, because you are in a true intimate relationship. (You don't seem to be in one right now. )

Or you withdraw your real emotions and continue game playing. This way you will never experience true transformation from within.

I don't think being with more woman will truly solve your neediness. You're only covering up the pain, clinging on to many woman so it's not so obvious and you can switch from one to another.

In a real relationship a lot of the PUA wisdom works differently. I suggest you start to explore where your neediness comes from, instead of judging, ignoring and covering it up.

Tiny suggestion: I bet it has something to do with your mother

Enjoy the ride.. !

Most definitely has something to do with my mother. All of my issues would of course come from inside myself. BTW I have taken 7+ years of therapy for my Social Anxiety. In highschool I was put into special education for 5 years in order to try to control my poor behavior.

I was diagnosed with inferiority complex, And yes I would agree it has a large amount to do with my mother. But a larger amount of what i tell myself in my head. But if 7+ years of therapy with trained professionals only got me to a manageable point. Then im not sure what to do about that.

I am aware that a massive amount of things in the PUA community will not work in a relationship, But a large amount of it still does and will. You have to be choosey, Like proper self-confidence will help anywhere, Even in my current relationship with my fiance.

That's one of the bigger reasons I started with PUA was because the techniques of seducation can easily be used to keep a current relationship happy and healthy.

Its your opinion to say im not in a true relationhip, But I disagree entirely. My fiance and I of 7 years have an extremely open (In the sense of communication) relationship. We can work through any problem and pretty much have.

Im not saying you are not in a TRUE relationship.

Im saying you sound very dependent of woman, and that doesn't sound healthy or 'happy-making' to me.

Of course, yes, this is my opinion. You can choose to have any kind of relationship you like of course.

Enjoy the ride!

I see now. you are probably correct in that. So essentially do you feel that I should try to work on self-confidence more than anything else? I am in general needy of women, I always have been. So what would be the answer for breaking that?

Also, Specific to the girl that I am currently attempting to get back. What are your suggestion's? She still seems warm towards me and will go weeks setting up plans for us to hang out, then I invest and she goes cold again. I dont like to think she is stringing me along, Because we have had sex on multiple occasions, So it should be easier to get back out of the friend zone correct, As opposed to having not been with her before?

Sorry, can't offer advice, but sounds like an interesting set up you got there. Nice work/good luck!