Hey I got that situation recently where I texted my ex (she left for some other dude) as I had a feeling she didn't feel well (health) and I wanted to know whether she's OK.

I just put a simple:

me: Hey, is everything alright? How are you feeling?
her: Hi, everything is ok. How are you? (i got a feeling like she doesn't care at all...)
me: I got a hunch and a weird dreams recently.
her: Do you worry about dreams? (I just got that like a shit test...)
me: do you think that its not worth it? (I put that one as a reframe/ I didn't want to go into her loop/ I felt she doesn't care and uses the power of that / I tried to drag her into my loop.)

... she didn't reply

I didn't want to talk about believing in dreams. I just wanted to ask how she feels. Thought if she replies to that I will put something like "It's not about dreams. I was just really worried and wanted to ask how are you?"


What is the difference between frame control, using loops and being defensive?
Maybe I used it in the wrong situation?
Was all that because I wasn't genuine and I didn't want to feel weak? That I wanted to gain some control?

Uh. Seriously?

Never mind frame control, loops, and being defensive.

This cunt left you for another guy. And you are checking on her fucking health? Look at my signature. And read it ten times.

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Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.